


Shepard's Beginning to an End

by Aroomie



Category: Mass Effect Trilogy
Genre: Awkward Garrus Vakarian, Character Death, Eventual Romance, Eventual Smut, F/M, I Don't Even Know, I'm Bad At Tagging, Interspecies Awkwardness, Interspecies Relationship(s), Interspecies Romance, Interspecies Sex, Jealous Garrus Vakarian, Other Additional Tags to Be Added, Paragon Shepard (Mass Effect), Protectiveness, Psychological Trauma, Resurrection, Romance, Swearing, Temporary Character Death, Threats, Threats of Violence, Trauma, Violence, Well... Mostly
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2017-12-02
Updated: 2018-08-31
Packaged: 2019-02-09 09:49:31
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 26
Words: 54,971
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/12885303
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Aroomie/pseuds/Aroomie
Summary: "Fairy tales don't just fall into your lap. You take hold of them and hold tightly, never letting go."~Elizabeth Shepard, Colonist, Survivor.(If you are here for smut: Chapter 7 and pending.)





	1. Crashed

**Author's Note:**

> I had written this story once before on another page, but going back and fixing it there would be my nightmare come to life... So... Here it is, new and better~!
> 
> The rating is for future chapters.

The Capitan stared at the list of people assigned to the ship, his glossy orbs staring blankly at the data pad. He reached over for the mug of coffee he had siting on his desk, when his eyes caught on an interesting name. He quickly took a sip of the hot beverage and sat forward, clicking on the name.

Name: Shepard, Elizabeth.  
Age: 23  
Sex: Female  
Blood Type: O-  
Recommendation: Captain David, Anderson.

The Captain's eye brow raised high, his interest peeked as he began to look more into Shepard’s file.

~~~ Crew Quarters ~~~

Shepard moved in as fast as she could, the element of surprise was to be hers. When the door to the room opened she froze, the sound of light snoring coming from her goal, she smiled to herself and moved in, her feet making only the slightest sounds when she snuck over to the bed. As she reached it, the sight of her teammate sleeping made her want to laugh he looked so at peace… too bad she's going to ruin it. As Shepard lifted her arms above her head her teammate turned and grabbed her waist, pulling her over his bed and on to the other side beside him. Shepard squealed at the sudden motion and started to laugh when she lay still on the bed.

"Fuck man. Why is it that I can never get you?"  
Shepard looked over at her teammate as he stopped laughing and gave her an evil childish smile.

"Because I can see the future. Wooo-Ooooo."  
Shepard gave him a funny look and started to laugh as he wiggles his fingers in her face as he tried his best imitation of a ghosts moaning. When they were done being child’s Shepard let him get dressed and they started to make their way to the bridge.

"Come on Kurtis, how is it that you always know when I’m going to try to do something?"

"I don’t know… guess you're getting predictable."  
Shepard looked at him and her eye brows furrowed, the skin bunching together in the middle, she hated being predictable.

~~~ The Bridge ~~~

When the door opened the two were greeted by people running around and sitting at computers decrypting and exchanging messages with HQ and other various locations. The captain was hunched over a table with star charts, the data pads overlapping one another. When a young man sitting at one of the computers saw Shepard and Kurtis walk in he stood up and ran over to the Captain who shortly nodded after he finished whispering in his ear.

"Shepard, Kurtis, would you please join me up here."  
The two straightened as their captain called out to them and ran over.

"Shepard, you oversee this next one, I hear you are highly recommended for it. We have just recently received information telling of a habitable planet in the Hades Gamma, I want you to compose a team of 10, get down there and find out if this Intel is correct, report back within 24 hours."

Shepard and Kurtis saluted their captain and left the bridge to go collect gear and men. They were silent on their way to the armory, both lost in thought and preparing themselves for the task at hand.

~~~ The Armory ~~~

The team was made of 4 turian, 2 salarian, and 4 humans, including Shepard and Kurtis. The Alliance began flying missions with a mix of species on board, helping for a better balance of alliances between species. 

"I don't like this, not one bit…"  
The young corporal crossed his arms as he finished holstering the weapon on his thigh.

"What don't you like Steve? This mission or taking orders from a girl?"  
The young human made a face as he turned over and looked at the Turian whom spoke.

“Both.”  
The turian turned, his mandibles flaring in what one could only assume was a grin, and began walking round the room with his hand on a hip and the other in the air.

"I’m your officer for this evening, I would like to let you know that I’ll be judging your performance while I sit over there fixing my nails and hair OK?"  
The turians of the squad started laughing, their understanding of the female role in human military greatly misunderstood, while the others simply smirked.

“I am so glad I can provide amusement for our Turian companions.”  
Everyone turned towards the voice and the laughing turians shut their mouths tightly at the sight of the squad leader. As she stalked inside the room, everyone stopped their preparations to watch, her posture straight as an arrow and professional. The piercing gaze of her emerald orbs sending shivers up their spines as she looked at every one of them individually, stray strands of crimson hair from the tight bun on top her head framed her face, and the prominent scar that lined her jaw was proof that she was not someone who appreciated the type of joke held within the locker room. 

“I believe that Turians are new to this ship, correct?”  
She stood tall in front of the turian who had mocked her, his seven-foot stature almost shrinking to a mere 7 inches under her gaze.

“Y-yes Ma’am…”  
She hummed softly at his answer.

“Well, I believe that you are not making the correct impression by starting off your time mocking your squad leader, hmm?”

“O-of course ma’am! Sorry Ma’am!”  
Shepard laughed internally as she smiled up at the turian before spinning on her heels and walking towards her own locker and began to collect her gear. When she sat down on the bench and began to check her weapons before holstering them, she could hear people whispering to themselves about what had just happened.

“Impressive display, Shepard. Although, was it completely necessary?”  
She giggled softly as her eyes lazily turned up to see a salarian staring down at her with a small grin on his face.

“Turians need to understand that just because the first contact wars are over, they can’t mock us. We are all on fairly equal grounds now, Globin”  
Her emerald orbs turned back over towards the mocking turian, a smug smirk forming on her ruby lips as she watched him fiddling nervously with his pistol.

“Alright… But you should be more careful. Please?”  
Shepards grin only grew as she tilted her head back and closed her eyes, kicking her feet out much like a child would when bored of being lectured by their parents.

“Yes, moo~~om.”  
Globin blinked and stared at Shepard for a moment, his eyes widening a moment before he began to laugh.

~~~ The Shuttle ~~~

"The intel tells that the best place to colonization is... Here."  
Shepard typed in a few keys on the keyboard at the front of the shuttle and a hologram of the planet's surface. Shepard moved her finger across the screen to an area that looked like a creator.

"We'll be landing here, 3 kilometers away, we´ll walk from there to avoid any detection just in case something is down there."  
The boys in the back nudged each other in the sides when their officer turned around.

"Hey Kurtis, you tap that yet?"  
Kurtis´s face turned a bright red color after his team mates made the cocky joke, and he shook his head angrily.

"NO! I don't know about you guys, but I treasure my friendship with her. I don't need more."  
Steve let out a chuckle.

"So, you haven't even thought about it?"

"No, I've thought of it but trust me but what I have with her is good enough for me."

As Kurtis spoke he turned his head back to look at Shepard, to his surprise she was standing right next to him and the group talking to him.

"Something interesting going on boys?"  
All the men's face turned bright red.

"No ma'am, we were just… talking about the mission."

"Oh? What about it?"  
Shepard smiled as every one of the guys couldn't think of anything to cover up what they were talking about. Suddenly without warning the shuttle started to bounce and the interior lights turned red.

"What just happened?!"  
Shepard made her way to the driver's seat as fast as she could.

"Something’s throwing off the thrusters, we’re hitting serious turbulence that is knocking off our coordinate drop. I suggest we all buckle ourselves in for an extremely bouncing ride."

"Noted. Everyone buckle up this is going to be a bumpy crash!”  
Shepard grinned and laughed as people in the squad almost screamed.

“Crash!?”  
“What the hell do you mean crash!?”

Shepard laughed again as she moved back to her seat to start buckling herself in, some of the men however did not manage to get their seats fastened in time. The shuttle suddenly went into a freefall, those whose seat belts weren't done up in time flew round the cabin as the shuttle was tossed around, some people tried to grab their teammates and hold them down, Shepard saw Globin as one of the ones flying around and grabbed his arm. In return he grabbed her arm and she pulled him in so that he may wrap his arms around her waist for his body to stop flying round, others saw the display and tried to do it with the rest of the men flying around. Shepard wrapped her arms around Globin when he tightened his grip on her, she knew he was scared, his large eyes were closed and his head down and pushing into Shepard's chest. She wasn't about to let him die, Globin was one of her closest friends. When Kurtis saw Shepard holding Globin he shot out his and the next chance he got and grabbed a man flying round, pulling him close provided difficult but when he did, he managed to get him close to his body before the shuttle suddenly slammed into the ground and stopped moving.

"Globin, you alright?"  
Shepard moved her head, so she could see her friends face better, when his eyes opened her heart lifted.

"Yea… do me a favor?"

"Anything for you, dear."

"Never make me do that again."  
Shepard looked at Globin and laughed out loud, soon he followed and others as well. Nodding went around the cabin as some men undid their seat belts to check others that didn’t manage to buckle up.

"Everyone out if the shuttle, let's see what the damage is…"


	2. Campsite

~~~ Planet Surface ~~~

As everyone pilled out of the shuttle and ahead count was done it was put down that there had been 3 casualties, the pilot got first impact and two others that were flying round the cabin had flown into the shuttle floor so hard that their neck broke killing them instantly.

"Who didn't make it?"  
Shepard placed a hand on the medical officer's shoulder when she saw him lower his head.

"The pilot and two of our gunnery chiefs."  
He lowered his head again and looked down at one of the bodies, tears threatening to over flow from his eyes.

"Who was he?"

"My brother."  
Shepard's heart sunk. Her gaze returning to the body and a deep frown crossed her lips for a moment before she spoke again.

"We'll take some time, bury the bodies. Globin, Kurtis and I will search for a place to set up camp."  
The men nodded as they watched the three walked off into the bush. Shepard being quiet most of the search, her mind trying to wrap itself around how people could sign up to be in the army and yet have family at home waiting for them to come home, the concept of it all eluding her with her past. Admits her thoughts she heard Globin and Kurtis start talking.

"So, how long have you known Shepard my bug-eyed friend?"  
Globin looked away from his scanning process and looked at the human.

"Apparently not as long as you, my slow metabolism friend."  
Kurtis looked at Globin and chuckled a bit.

"What? What's so funny?"

"You would think having a slow metabolism would be a good thing."  
Globin moved his three-fingered hand up to his mouth and thought about it.

"You have a point, that way you can die closer to the ages of 100 and then regret half of your life on your death bed."  
Kurtis stopped all movement when Globin said, "death bed", he hated to think about dying, it was the only thing that really scared him. Shepard turned around to see why Kurtis had gone silent and saw that all the color on his face had gone; Globin on the other hand was trying not to laugh.

"What was that for?"

"I'm sorry Shepard, it seemed like a good opportunity. Some humans mock how long we live, like Kurtis here, I thought it would be a good pay back."  
Shepard looked from Globin and back to Kurtis, shaking her head and grinned broadly at him.

“Fair enough, but maybe try not to traumatize my dear Kurtis, will you?”  
Globin laughed and nodded slightly.

“I am forever innocent.”  
She giggled again and motioned her head forwards to keep moving. 

As they walked Kurtis was snapped out of his small coma from Globin’s comment and they all held a conversation to keep their minds off things. When they reached a cave that Shepard had seen from afar, Globin pulled out his omni tool and stared a scan.

"Good oxygen flow from the mouth and end of the cave, dry enough to start a fire or two, big enough to fit the rest of the team… excellent eyes Shepard, this will do nicely."

"Good. Kurtis, I want you to go get the rest of the team, Globin and I will stay here and make this place a little homier."

Kurtis groaned before he started throwing out colorful curse words around in protest as he walked off and Shepard laughed at him.

*** 2 hours later ***

Shepard and Globin had finished the preparation for the team to arrive; they had made 7 moss beds and had two beautiful fires going.

"Where is he?"  
Shepard had started pacing half an hour ago, worry on her face as well as irritation. Globin walked over to Shepard after putting more wood on the fire and placed a hand on her shoulder.

"Don't worry so much Shepard, I'm sure he's fine."  
Just as he said something, the bushes just outside the cave started to move. The two automatically went for their weapons, a reflex built into their bodies from months of training, as the two took aim at that movement they were both startled to see Kurtis and the men running toward them.

"What happened?"  
Shepard grabbed hold of one of the solders arm.

“Something came up behind us!”  
Her gaze turned out into the bush, drawing her pistol with one hand as the other began to glow a brilliant blue. A couple of the men stepped out to the mouth of the cave with her as she advanced forward, her step pausing as the bush in front of her stirred, a small crying whimper coming from just beyond. Her brow knit together as she holstered her pistol, ignoring the whispers of protest behind her, and pushed back the push. Her lips pressed together in a deep frown as the glow from her hand vanished and she dipped behind the bushes for a moment, the men at the cave exchanging worried looks to one another before she finally came back out, her arms full of something they couldn’t make out.

“Get me a knife.”  
She rushed into the cave with her men following behind, one of them pulling out his pocket knife and handing it to her, only then did they see she had carried a baby varren, her eyes narrowing as she took note of what had the small varren in a state of near death. A thread from one of the solders supply pack had somehow fallen loose and was caught on the varrens leg, as the solders ran, the thread wrapped around the small body of the varren. Shepard sighed, a little dramatically, as she took the knife offered to her and quickly started to cut the thread away.

“You need to be more careful, people. Things like this can only lead to worsening the situation.”  
The men whispered their apologies as Shepard cut the last bit of thread and put the knife away, her hand gently petting the varrens side as it began to breath normally again. Her gaze shifted up to Globin as he knelt across from Shepard and brought up his omni-tool.

"Breathing is normal, no broken bones or fractures, it should be running round soon."  
Everyone smiled as the little varren opened its eyes, closely examining everyone around it. Soon though other sound started to come from the cave mouth.

"I think mom wants her baby back."  
Everyone nodded at Shepard as they saw a group of varren appear from the bushes. Shepard picked up the baby as it tried to stand up when it saw its mother and took it closer to the mouth of the cave, the other varren growling and hissing at her when they saw the cub in her arms. As Shepard held out her hands with the child in them, the hissing stopped, and the mother took the cub, all of them running away at once and as fast as they arrived.

“Well now… That was eventful.” She turned around and walked back into the cave.

“Everyone get some rest. We have a big day tomorrow before we can report back in, make sure you’re rested.”  
She moved further into the cave, stopping at one of the makeshift moss beds.

“2-hour interval watch duty, Kurtis, you’re on first shift.”  
He saluted her with a grin and nod, running to the mouth of the cave and getting comfortable on a rock. Shepard watched him for a moment before laying down, falling asleep within moments of laying her head down.


	3. Preperation

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> When I looked at the old chapter for this story... I realized that it was going to be WAY to hard to move parts over that I already had down... So... One chapter, has now become two! Hurrah!

Shepard woke to the sound of voices. Her emerald orbs staring at nothing for a moment as the blurriness of her waking vision became clearer. She sat up and checked her omni-tool and the time, rubbing her face as she stood and typed aimlessly at the omni-tool as she sauntered over towards where she had noticed Kurtis and Globin talking with one another.

“What are you doing, Shepard?”  
She glanced up at then, scowling silently as she looked back to the screen. Kurtis laughed softly and held up a mug of hot coffee.

“Coffee princess?”  
Shepard groaned and snatched the mug, gulping down the steaming liquid before giving the mug back. Kurtis and Globin stared with wide eyes as she chugged the beverage, Kurtis even wincing at the end as he gripped the mug as it was placed back in his hand. 

“Uhm… Ow?”  
Shepard smirked over at Globin and shook her head as she finished typing and sending a message.

“Now do we get to know what you did?”  
She rolled her eyes as she looked at Kurtis.

“I sent a report of our first 16 hours planet side.”  
Shepards eyes looked out at the trees in front of the cave mouth, watching the members of her squad check over their equipment.

“I don’t have a good feeling about this place.”  
Globin and Kurtis both looked at one another again as Shepard quickly went back into the cave and retrieved pieces of her gear she had taken off for sleep.  
She holstered her pistol to her thigh and checked her rifle, staring down the scope, her eye fixating on a small pebble as her mind went blank.   
The sound of booming engines gave her a start, her finger squeezing the trigger and a shot went off. Her emerald eyes wide with shock for a moment before pure rage covered her features. Shepard stormed out of the cave, her squad already at its mouth and staring up at the cargo ships coming down from orbit. Shepard’s eyes were ablaze with rage as she waited patiently, holding one of her arms out to keep her squad in place.  
Once a shuttle had touched down and its doors open, the people coming out were not suspecting the solder coming up in their faces.

“Who is in charge?”  
Shepard’s voice was laced with rage as she glared at each person until one of them finally pointed towards the captain’s right-hand man now disembarking one of the other ships. Shepards eyes cut towards the man and stalked over to him, her squad still waiting patiently by the cave mouth.

“What in the hell is all this crap, Sir!?”  
The man sighed heavily and looked at Shepard.

“Watch your language. This is by order of the Capitan.”  
Shepard growled in her chest as she looked back at the ships arriving and starting to unload.

“This place isn’t safe! We haven’t even finished surveying the area!”  
Her superior rolled his eyes and stared down at Shepard.

“What Capitan orders, Capitan gets. Now get your team in line, you are to help keep eyes out.”  
Shepard growled again as she saluted him and stalked off back to her squad.

“So? What’s the word boss lady?”  
Shepard cut her eyes towards Kurtis, grumbling softly before speaking.

“Apparently Capitan didn’t like a late report, so he sent ships to start colonizing anyways…”  
She looked over her shoulder.

“We are to be on guard duty over these piss ants.”  
The turians of the group snickered quietly and Shepard looked back them with a playful grin.

“Come on… Lets play our delightfully fulfilling roles and be done with it. I have a pillow back on the ship with my name on it when this is over.”  
Shepard motioned for half of her group to check out some new arriving ships as she took the other half back down with her and watched over the, what seemed to be, endless crates being unloaded from the ships. Shepard bounced on her toes as she looked around, tilting her head as she watched bushes rustle and trees bend to the wind. 

Shepard stood and watched as a couple workers started to argue on how to remove a crate that had somehow become lodged in a small hole in the ground, her emerald gaze drifting around and stopped on the trees. They were no longer moving, and the air seemed to stand still, her eyes drifted back towards the arguing workers then over toward each member of her squad. Kurtis was on the far side of camp speaking with some of the other squad members, Globin was off with one of the turians, and the others were scattered about. Shepard looked back towards the arguing men, her gaze narrowing as she walked slowly over to them, the ground around the container cracking slightly. Shepard placed one of her gloved hands on one of the workers faces, shoving him to the side.

“Both of you, shut up.”  
Her emerald eyes glued to the ground and ignoring the cursing going on behind her as she gently touched the dirt. As it fell away from under her hand, her eyes grew wide and she stood back up.

“Back away. Right now.”  
As she took a step back one of the workers go tin her face.

“Who do you think you are!? This will not move itself! And if you think for one second that just because you are in your fancy pansy armor with your stupid solder “education” that I will take advice from you, you have another thing coming!”  
Shepard growled, grabbing hold of the man’s shirt.

“There is a sink hole there, you moron. If you want to die, be my guest.”  
As Shepard released the mans shirt, she turned on her heels and stalked off. After taking more than a few meters length of steps, her eyes trailed over her shoulder as the ground beneath her feet began to tremble. Shepard’s eyes grew wide as she stared over her shoulder, the canister that had been stuck in the ground was now flying mid-air, the men around it with it as they spun uncontrollably. The large worm like creature suddenly protruding from the ground made Shepard stare in a mix of shock, surprise, and fear.

“Threasher Maw!”  
Shepards eyes snapped towards the voice, one of her turian squad members, and started a sprint for him. She ducked flying rocks and jumped over panicked people until she had finally reached him.

“How the hell was that missed on the scans!?”  
The turian shook his head in a panic.

“No one knows! They don’t always show up on hazard scans. Something to do with how deep they are under ground and their plates. I don’t know!”  
Shepard growled and looked back over at the Maw, the large worm was now latched onto a shuttle and trying to eat it. Her emerald gaze narrowing as she noticed the shuttles engines were still on. 

“That son of a…”  
Her emerald eyes scanned the area as more of her squad filed in behind the cover, finally noticing the Capitan’s right-hand man sprawled out on the ground in a bloody mess.

“Well just fucking great…”  
She knelt back down and took count of all that was there with her. Seeing Kurtis and Globin eased part of her panicking heart as she watched him motion for other people to come to the cover. She watched as four other people filled the space behind the cover, gnawing her lower lip as she peeked around the edge and watched as the Maw was now looking around, carnage from falling containers and heavier rocks drawing it towards the blood.

“That thing… is really gross.”  
She looked back at the group, Kurtis staring at her and grinning as she shook his head.

“Anyone got an emergency beacon? Since our all mighty Capitan sent down a dumb ass who got killed, we sort of need one now.”  
There were nervous chuckles around the group of survivors at Shepard’s words.

“We set up a beacon, over there.”  
Shepard looked from the women who spoke toward where she was pointing. A loud exaggerated groan leaving her lips as the beacon was on the other side of the giant Maw that was trying to eat everything.

“Right. Of course, it’s over there. Where else would it be?”  
She grumbled and rubbed her face, staring at the ground as she thought over the situation, trying to come up with something. She started to nibble on her lower lip as she drew in the ground with a stick, half of the team could be a distraction, the other half make a run for the beacon, no. Too stupid, too risky. One person? No. two? Damn it.

“I have no great ideas for this. All I know, is that this is complete shit.”  
Kurtis laughed dryly at her words, shaking his head slightly.

“The only way one of us is getting over to the beacon, is if most of us act as a distraction.”  
Shepard’s face darkened at his words.

“You and I both know that most of the distraction will get killed.”  
There was a prolonged silence, everyone stared at each other than at the ground. It felt like an eternity till someone spoke.

“I’d rather take the chance out there then be stuck here with you lot.”  
Shepard grinned at the words of the worker who spoke, glancing around to find others nodding with the same set of minds.

“Alright… Whose running for their dear life then?”  
Globin raised his hand, his head tilting to the side slightly.

“I ran track against the crew while waiting for assignment. I am fastest on board, besides you Shepard, and I believe you should be out in the distraction trying to keep people alive.”  
Shepard nodded slightly, blowing stray strands of her hair from her face as she glanced at her make shift “floor plan” drawn into the dirt. 

“So then… The best plan in that case… Is pretty much to just… Scatter.”  
Shepard made a face before she continued speaking.

“I know it’s not the greatest plan… But, is we all stick together in one or two larger groupings, we could all get squished at once and then Globin is pretty much fucked.”  
There were some odd nods going around the group.

“Now, since we seem to be fairly evened out… Everyone gets one weapon to keep the distraction up, fire only when you think it has noticed Globin and save yourself from burning the thermal, we only have so many.”  
As Shepard spoke, she handed off her sniper rifle to the worker standing next to her, patting his shoulder as she motioned for the others to hand off a weapon. She looked out from behind the cover for a moment then back to the group, one weapon short.

“Everyone has one but you?”  
She stared at the young man as he nodded and she sighed, unholstering her pistol and giving it to him.

“But then you don’t have one!”  
His face was pale, his voice cracking, and his whole body trembled. He was definitely the most terrified. She moved over to him and smiled sweetly, placing her hand on his cheek to keep his focus on her.

“Hey, I don’t need it. I have biotics and plenty of things laying around to throw at it. Ok?”  
The man too a deep breath, nodding rapidly and Shepard gently patted his cheek before stepping back.

“Remember. The goal is to stay alive, and keep its attention away from Globin. We leave at once and scatter, Globin will move once it’s attention is on us.”  
Shepard shot a comforting, yet worried, smile toward Kurtis and Globin before crouching and peeking out from behind cover, watching as the Maw started to turn from them and look in the direction of the beacon.

“And... Now!”


	4. All is Lost

As Shepard ducked out from behind cover, her biotics flared, covering her arms in brilliant hues of blue as a crate not that far away lifted from the ground and flew at the back of the Maw. The medium sized crate shattered against the Maw and caused it to turn around, hissing in her direction as the rest of the group ran out from behind cover and scattered in all directions. Shepard’s eyes cut from the Maw over towards the cover, watching as Globin made a mad dash for the beacon, a large grin on her face as she looked back at the Maw. 

Dropping don and sliding into cover to catch her breath, she peeked out to see what the situation was, her emerald eyes growing wide. Half of the men with her were already injured or dead, the Maw spitting a green liquid that melted the limbs off a person. She gasped as Kurtis fired off a shot, the Maw looking towards him and throwing its head back, Shepard panicked and quickly shot out her hand as it flared in blue. The blue glow wrapped around Kurtis’s waist and pulled him back towards Shepard’s direction just as the Maw spit in his direction.   
Kurtis cried out in surprise as he was suddenly pulled, grinning at Shepard as he stood back up and she ran over to him.

“Don’t do that!”  
He laughed at her.

“Aw, is the big scary Elizabeth Shepard scared of me getting hit?”  
She growled at him and punched his shoulder before pushing him behind cover as the Maw tried thrusting a rock over in their direction, she landed on her rear while dodging it and rolled her eyes as Kurtis kept laughing, the both moving again. 

“Will you stop joking around? This just so happens to be a really fucked up situation!”  
He just kept laughing, firing off another shot as they ducked behind cover again. This time Kurtis being the one to maneuver Shepard from being squished by a bolder, a small grin on his lips as he had her pinned with her back against the cover and his body flush against hers.

“Me? Never.”  
She rolled her eyes and grinned as she shoved him off, looking at the field and taking note of who was left. Six people. She cringed at the number, her eyes searching for Globin and at that moment her omni-tool lit up. She brought it up to look at and quickly answered the call.

“Globin?! What the hell?”  
Globin coughed on the other end of the com, laughing softly.

“The beacon is active, Shep.”  
She sighed with relief and closed her eyes as she smiled.

“Thank god. What’s your status? It’s time to fall back into cover till help arrives.”

“I don’t think I can do that, Shep.”  
Her eyes shot to the screen, her brow knitting together.

“What do you mean you can’t?”  
There was a silence. A silence that Shepard didn’t care for.

“I’m hit…”  
Shepard’s face grew pale and Kurtis grabbed her shoulder gently.

“Where are you? I’m coming to get you.”  
Kurtis gripped her shoulder tighter and shook his head sternly.

“You will do no such think, Liz!”  
She growled at Kurtis as he held her still, panic growing in her chest for her friend.

“He’s right, Shep… You need… to get to safety, I’m…”  
Globin’s voice dropped off and Shepard stared at her omni-tool, her eyes wide as her jaw dropped. Kurtis pulled her too him and hugged her tightly, the silence of the call drowning everything out. 

“We… Still have people to save…”  
She pushed away from Kurtis and brushed her hand back over her hair and took a deep breath, closing her omni-tool, she looked out from behind cover. 2 people. She grimaced and looked at the Maw, her biotics grabbing another crate and throwing it in its direction.

“Cover! Find it now!”   
She screamed at the top of her lungs, Kurtis running out with her as they both maneuvered around flying rocks and green spit. Screaming from just in front of them sent shivers down Shepards spine. One left. She growled and shoved Kurtis before her and halted her run, turning on her heels as her biotics flared once again and another container was sent flying at the Maw. She bounced on her feet as this time the crate caused the Maw to topple over some, and she smiled triumphantly, right up till it swung back around. 

As it came around, the Maw kicked up boulders and containers of the like, and hurled them across the way. Shepard watched as most flew right past her, her eyes widening in horror as her view was filled of Kurtis. He paused in his run to look back at her with that stupid grin on his face as he looked over to her, the grin vanishing and horror replacing it as the debris flung over her head landed and rolled right over him and the last survivor. Her mind blanked as she stared at the red stains of blood splattered on the debris, the hissing roar of the Maw making her head turn back to its attention.  
Her body grew tense, her whole body flaring up with biotic energy. She took off in a sprint, jumping over rocks and bodies, her mind spinning as she ran past a container with large prints of “Warning: Handle with care.” Her fists clenched as she ran faster, thrusting her body forward over a large bolder with her biotics and skidding to ta stop at a body. She fisted the pistol next to the body, her biotic glowing brightly as the canister covered with warning labels was thrown at the Maw. Shepard lifted the pistol, taking aim and firing off two shots. 

The canister exploded right on top of the Maw, the section of its body close enough to the blast exploding in a glorious show of blood and pieces flying in the air. Shepard remained were she was, watching as the Maw shrieked and thrashed around, throwing blood all around the field. Shepard watched as its thrashing grew slower, only now moving her body and dropped the pistol as she took one step closer with out thinking, the thrashing Maw lashing out in one last bout of fits and just barely grazed her face across her cheek bones and nose. She cried out and stepped back, covering her face and her biotics flared once again in rage as she turned back to see the Maw had finally fallen still and limp. Dead.  
She walked over to it and kicked it once just to be sure before walking away, her steps clumsy and tripping over the smallest things as she walked towards the beacon. Once she arrived, she couldn’t help the involuntary action of her vomiting, Globin’s body was leaning against the beacon and half gone remanence of green spit dripping off him. Shepard gasped a breath and walked over to him after composing herself the best she could and removed his tags. She stared at him a moment longer before turning away and began the search for other tags and other things to remember all who had come there, picking off patches with names stitched into them from uniforms of workers if they did not have tags. 

Her last area to search caused her feet to freeze, her eyes stuck on the blood stains from where Kurtis was crushed. She loved him, she never told him, but he some how knew. She finally started searching, her view becoming distorted and blurry as her eyes finally started to fill with tears as she searched for his tags. The longer she searched, the more frantic she became, the fear of not finding his tags to remember him outside of her memories causing her heart to ache painfully. 

The sun had slowly gone down over time, the darkness overwhelming her as she continued searching for hours, tears and blood staining her face when she finally could not see enough to continue looking. She stared blankly at the darkness, kneeling in blood stained mud, her body limp as her mind blanked focused on finding the tags of her loved one. Her emerald eyes cut to the side as the bushes beside her began to move, her lips thinning out as the though of death crossed her mind. 

“I would be ok with that…”  
She spoke out loud, her eyes closing as she waited for something to happen. When nothing did, she opened her eyes and looked around, the lights on her armor giving off just enough for her eyes to land on a small varren standing in front of her. Her brow knitted together as she stared at it, its head tilting slightly and looked her over before it ran off. Shepard stared after it for a while before closing her eyes again and sighed, rubbing the back of her hand over her face and wincing at the cut on her face, the tags in her hand jingling together. She held them out and stared at them, new tears spilling from her eyes and she wiped furiously at them, a soft whining in front of her catching her attention. 

The varren had come back, something dangling from its mouth. Shepard looked more closely and bit her lip as she reached out for it, the varren dropping it in her mouth, the newly found tags clinking together as they landed in her hand. She stared at the tags for a moment before looking at the animal, looking more closely and noticing the marks left on its skin from the tangles of thread. Shepard bit her lip hard to stop herself from crying again as she took the varren into her arms and hugged it close, shutting her eyes tightly.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So.... I do have mixed feelings about this chapter... But... It is still much better then the original!


	5. Damming

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I am aware that some of the military talk might be SEVERELY wrong and off... however... I am rather happy with this chapter!

~~~~~~~~~ The Infirmary ~~~~~~~~~~

Shepard woke to a beeping noise, a very annoying beeping noise. Her emerald gaze shifting to the side as she glared at the monitor next to her head and groaned at it to shut it up, and as if on cue, it silenced. She blinked a few times before witting up, wincing as her hand shot to her side and gripped her rips.

“Hey! Look who’s finally awake!”  
Shepard’s eyes widened as she looked over at the voice, Kurtis and Globin sitting across the way from her. She opened her mouth to talk but nothing came out, her hand reaching out to them.

“You look like you’ve seen a ghost, Shep.”  
They both laughed softly, Kurtis opening his mouth to talk but nothing came out despite the movement of his mouth, his eyes smiling at her as he continued. Then Globin spoke, but the same nothing came from his mouth. Shepard stared in horror and closed her eyes tightly as she cupped her head between her hands and hid behind her knees ass he pulled them up to her chest.   
Hands on her shoulders made her body jolt, trembling as she opened her eyes and backed away from them in a panic. She stared at the owner of the hands, a frown tugging at her lips as she stared at Anderson.

“It is good to see you awake, Elizabeth. You have been asleep for almost a week.”  
A deep frown crossed her lips as her eyes cast down.

“How… Long was I… Planet side?”  
Anderson watched as Shepard stared downward, her voice was harsh and cracked from not using it, thinking about his answer.

“Two days.”  
Shepard hummed softly, her mind swimming.

“We could hardly collect you, actually.”  
Shepard’s eyes shot up at his words, her brow knitted together in worry and confusion. Anderson smiled slightly and reached over, patting her leg gently.

“You had a body guard.”  
Anderson motioned towards the far side of the room and Shepard’s gaze followed, her lips parting as a tinny varren was asleep on one of the chairs bolted to the wall.

“That’s…”  
Anderson tilted his head slightly as she began speaking, but she shook her head and simply smiled for a brief moment before looking back at Anderson.

“I remember… A Thresher Maw… And screaming…”  
She stared at Anderson a moment longer, the both of them not speaking.

“I’m… The only one alive… Aren’t I?”  
Anderson reached over and took Shepard’s hand into his, his lips a thin line as he looked back up at her.

“They are saying that communications went down on the ship, that a green light was given despite the lack of communications.”  
Shepard could feel her stomach turning at the words, her lips thinning out.

“The Captain...”  
She began speaking, but Anderson finished.

“Claims that the fault lies with the ground team.”

Shepard couldn’t stop it, she got up as quickly as her body allowed and grabbed a waist bin, her stomach emptying itself. Anderson was right with her, holding her hair and rubbing her back as she coughed up the last of the bile and sat back against him, tears filling her eyes as she stared at the wall. The varren woke with all commotion, jumping down from it’s place on the chair and walked over to Shepard, gently nuzzling its face against her thigh.

“There will be a trial, I assume?”  
Anderson nodded slightly, rubbing his hand across her shoulders as they remained seated on the cold floor till she was ready to move. They sat for a solid hour before Shepard began to move and Anderson helped her up, letting her lean on him as he helped her back onto the bed. The varren jumped up on to the foot of the bed as Shepard was finally seated, resting its head on her feet, her emerald eyes were locked on it.

“You should think of a name for him.”  
Shepard looked away from the varren.

“Him?”  
Anderson nodded some, folding his arms across his chest.

“The doctor looked him over when he came with you. He seems very reluctant to leave your side, I believe he has chosen you to be his master… of sorts.”  
Shepard looked back at the varren, observing the way he stared at her. His large dark golden eyes never leaving her gaze as she watched him and looked over his details, his back plate was a deep royal blue with almost silver stripes across it while his body matched them in a silvery grey colour.

“Caneo.”  
Anderson tilted his head slightly, looking over at the varren as his tail started to wag at the sound of the name.

“Latin for Silver… Fitting.”  
Shepard reached over and hooked her hands under Caneo’s from legs and pulled him up and beside her on the bed as she lay down completely, resting her hand on his head as she watched him, her eyes getting heavy.

“Rest. I will come check on you later.”  
She nodded slightly as she glanced up at Anderson, a small smile on her lips before falling asleep again. Anderson watched for a moment as she slept, a slight frown tugging his lips as he watched her. He reached over and gently ran a hand over her hair, Caneo watching him carefully, his eyes stuck on the bandage across her face as he tried to remember her face when she was younger.

Anderson looked out for Shepard when she came to the citadel. So young, innocent, and sweet. He took her in as his own after he found her on Mindoir when slavers attacked her home, despite the loss of her birth parents and friends, she always kept a positive outlook. He prayed to any gods listening she could still do the same now.

~~~~~~~~ Alliance outpost, outskirts of Alliance space. ~~~~~~~~

“This is bull shit.”  
Shepard crossed her arms over her chest and grumbled as she stat and listened to the high up politicians of the alliance talk in circles, rolling her eyes when her Captain made his statement about what had happened. He was a raciest bigot, everyone knew it. Shepard glared at him as he spoke, talking about his crew and the turians who had come on board, how it was a dysfunctional mission before it began, Shepard was seething through a clenched jaw. She was angry, and she had every right to be.

“We will now listen to what the survivor has to say.”  
Shepard looked up at the voice speaking to her, the old man at the helm of this whole hearing speaking to her as he hunched over his table. Shepard stood and straightened her uniform, walking over to the witness’s seat, her emerald eyes locking onto the soldier whom stepped in front of her and held up his left hand.

“Do you swear to tell the truth, the whole truth, so help you god?”  
Shepard internally screamed at the solder as she held up her left hand.

“I do, so help me god.”  
The solder stepped back and nodded, as if giving permission for everyone to continue as Shepard sat down.

“Now… Tell us what happened. From the beginning.”  
Shepard glanced up at the old man, biting her lower lip as she glanced down at the floor for a moment. Her eyes lifted, landing on Anderson and he gave a reassuring nod as she took in a deep breath before speaking. 

“Myself and a fellow solder were called to the bridge for debriefing. I was given squad leader to my men.”  
Shepard spoke about the jokes that were made when she stepped in to the armory, the sudden free fall of their shuttle, and the varren incident. Shepard paused as she started to speak about the next morning, a lump forming in her throat. 

“My team was interrupted by the arrival of loading ships, the noise of the engines and the heat against the sand disrupting the dwelling of a Thresher Maw. It woke up and…”  
She paused again, her eyes filling with tears as she bit her tongue, rubbing a hand over her face to try and stop the tears from over flowing.

“And…?”  
Shepard cleared her throat and licked her lips before speaking.

“I watched everyone die. Some were crushed by flying rocks, some disintegrated by acid… I think… Some were eaten… The faint screaming of someone in its mouth…”  
Whispers traveled around the room as Shepard spoke, her eyes locked on the floor as she continued.

“We lost people, trying to activate the distress beacon. My friends. When it was all over… I tried to collect names, tags… Anything I could for the families of those lost.”  
Her tears betrayed her as they fell from her eyes, staining her cheeks as she looked around the room finally, her eyes growing wide as she could see the faces of everyone who died in the crowd. Shepard bit her lip, her hands gripping tightly at her uniform pants as she was dismissed from the seat as the session was over for the day. She walked straight to Anderson, her eyes locking on Kurtis and Globin, even though she knew they were not there. Anderson held his arm around her shoulders as they walked out of the room, the jury talking loudly behind them as booming voices came to argue.   
Anderson took Shepard to her room and left her for the night, promising to come back in the morning to check on her. 

Shepard lay in bed, staring at the ceiling as she absentmindedly pets the top of Caneo’s head as he lay next to her, a soft rumble in his chest as if he was purring at her touch. The sound was comforting, helping her to sleep. Her sleep was not a peaceful one, waking up in the middle of the night in a cold sweat and tears staining her face, as her dreams relived the Maw’s attack. She didn’t sleep the rest of the night, instead she began working out, doing sit ups and crunches as she tried to distract herself from her dreams and thoughts of the trial. 

The next morning came quickly and her lack of sleep was apparent on her face when Anderson arrived. He grimaced when he saw the bags under her eyes, frowning as her eyes were red and puffy. She simply smiled at him and got ready to head to the court room, this time bringing Caneo with her as far as she was able, leaving him at the main doors of the court room.

She sat straight as an arrow, lips thinned out, as she watched the jury file in. She began fiddling with her fingers as she waited, her muscles tense, as the jury finally spoke.

“We find this incident to be as the Captain said. The ground team’s “crash” must have agitated the Maw and created the incident.”  
Shepard felt every muscle in her body give way, her jaw dropping some as she stared at the jury and then to the judge of the hearing. He made a soft humming sound of pondering before speaking.

“Very well. Despite your story, Shepard, it appears your Captain out ranked you in this hearing. Normally, you would be discharged from line of duty. However, given the circumstances and the truth behind your story, you will be put on probation.”  
Shepard felt her heart sink down to her feet, her eyes shutting as she listened to the old man speak.

“You will be given proper time to get over this ordeal. Then, when the time is right, you will be allowed to serve once again.”  
Shepard nodded slightly, as the old man took his hammer and slammed it against his desk, dismissing everyone. As they all filed out, Shepard remained, her mind reeling. She stared at her hands and all she could see was blood, voices in her head calling her a failure. A hand slapping the table in front of her pulled her from her thoughts.

“Tough break, kid. This wasn’t a fair fight for you, it never was. Maybe next time we meet, I can make you cry some more.”  
Shepard’s emerald eyes trailed up from the hand and up the arm, her eyes landing on her Captain's grinning smug face. Her eyes were blazing with rage as her tears dried.

“The next time we meet, Sir…”  
Her voice was cold and distance, her eyes seeming to be actual green fire as she stared up at the Captain with pure hate.

“You will be staring at me from the flat of your back, with my gun in your mouth.”  
The Capitan’s face grew slightly pale despite his attempt to look unfazed by her words and tone, his body involuntarily flinching away from her as Shepard stood and walked out of the room.


	6. New Chances

Shepard stared at the drink in front of her, the bright blue liquid changing hues with the change of the lights in the Cora’s Den. Six months after the trial of Akuze she was allowed back into alliance service with the condition that she visit a therapist minimally twice a week. A year after the trial, she volunteered to join mixed race ships, to learn and get away from the corrupted minds of mostly human crews. 

She tipped her glass, watching as the liquid in her glass turned a violet purple with the light. 2 and a half years after her trial, she was promoted to the rank of commander, her service record flawless after Akuze, next to no casualties. Her eyes drifted to the tags wrapped around her wrist, her lips thinning as she took a moment to remember her friends, her love. Three weeks after her trial, she had received a package in the mail filled to the brim with hollows, when she inspected them they were all from Kurtis. He had taken journals through his time in the military, and when he met her, confessing all his feelings and talking about her constantly in his vids. Her nightmares got worse after that, seeing her shrink almost every day as she tried to figure out her feelings. Eventually, she stopped crying, she stopped feeling it, she realized she had cried enough and it was time to move on. 

Shepard tipped her glass back and downed the liquid, tapping the glass on the bar for a refill, her head tilting to the side as she shifted in her dress. She was off duty for the next weeks to come, her last assignment taking her into outer citadel space with a specter, what was his name…? Nihlus something. Shepard had heard rumors about her name being tossed around for specter consideration, but she didn’t listen to the rumors, cause that’s all they were. 

Supposedly, with her name in consideration, she was given time off to “unwind” and relax until a decision was made about the consideration. Shepard rolled her shoulders and kicked her feet, her heels clicking against the floor as she hummed quietly with her own thoughts, her mind trailing back to her ex captains face, making her grimace. A familiar voice pulled her from her thoughts.

“Well, I never expected to find you here.”  
Shepard spun in her seat, her gaze falling on an all to familiar face.

“Specter.”  
She smiled and dipped her head to him before spinning back around, taking a sip from her drink.

“I see you are spending your off-duty time well.”  
Shepard laughed bitterly as she took another sip, looking over at Nihlus as he took a seat next to her.

“I will have you know, Specter, that I take everything seriously.”  
Nihlus’s mandibles flared in what Shepard assumed was a turian smirk, his eyes darting to the drink in her hands.

“What are you even drinking?”  
Shepard opened her mouth to answer him then paused, looking down at her glass and tipped the glass, the blue liquid changing colour with the light again, and lifted her brow.

“You know… I really don’t know. Something from Thessia, I think.”  
Nihlus stared at Shepard a moment, folding his hands in front of him.

“You are saying that just because it is blue, aren’t you?”  
Shepard gasped, looking at Nihlus with wide eyes and grinned as she gently shoved the turians armored shoulder.

“I would never!”  
She took a long pause, staring back at her drink.

“But in this case, yes.”  
She grinned as Nihlus let out a loud chuckle, shaking his head at her as he placed his hand over his face.

“But hey, even though I do not know what it is… It does taste rather good.”  
She held the glass up to him, swishing the liquid in the glass to taunt him. He took the glass and shook his head at her, taking a sip from it before giving it back, his mandibles pressing tight to his face.

“That… Is really sour! How can you drink that?”  
Shepard laughed as Nihlus coughed after his sip, grinning as she pat his back gently.

“It’s not that bad, whimp.”  
Nihlus shook his head again and looked at Shepard, taking her in. Her dress was short, just barely covering half way down her thighs, the top of the dress gave a generous view of her cleavage. The fiery strands of her hair were pulled into a tight bun, the way it always was on missions, and he found himself wondering just how long it was. Shepard noticed his gaze linger and she smiled at him, dipping her head down slightly to make eye contact.

“Get a good view?”  
Nihlus jumped at her words and his eyes shot back up to her face, the smile on her lips making his mandibles hug tight to his face in embarrassment.

“Sorry, Shepard.”  
She giggled at him, taking another sip of her drink. Her eyes lingered across the bar and her lips turned into a deep scowl, Nihlus turning his gaze to where she was looking, a group of human men stared at her. They were making motions about her bust and undressing her with their eyes, Nihlus found himself repulsed by them and when he turned his gaze back at Shepard she found she shared the same thought. Her stomach was turning, and her lips pressed into a deep scowl.

“I do believe, I have had enough to drink here.”  
She hoped down from her seat and smiled at Nihlus, extending her hand to him.

“Care to be my escort away from the filthy eyes of humans?”  
Nuhlis’s brow plated lifted at her choice of words, but he stood and took her hand in the crook of his arm and began walking out with her. 

“You seem to have a distaste for men staring at you.”  
He finally spoke after they walked for almost half an hour. Shepard’s eyes lifting up toward his face for a moment before she looked straight ahead again.

“Not all men. Just humans.”  
Nihlus dipped his head down and looked at her, his brow plates still lifted.

“Only humans?”  
Shepard caught his gaze and giggled, she was buzzed, and found herself talking more about herself then she normally cared for.

“I had a love, once, he died. Humans killed him, and humans almost killed me.”   
She shrugged her shoulders slightly.

“I only care for one human, the man who took me in and raised me. Other then him, I don’t need other humans, they are noisy.”  
Nihlus made a soft humming sound and tilted his head back up, Shepard hugging his arm to her as she stumbled in her step a little.

“That is why you volunteered for other racial ships.”  
Shepard nodded slightly, pausing in her step and re-adjusting her heels before walking again. 

“Besides, humans are boring in bed.”  
Nihlus coughed and sputtered at the random statement, staring down at Shepard with wide eyes.

“Excuse me?”  
She stared laughing at his reaction, gently patting his arm as the resumed walking.

“Humans are boring in bed.”  
She tilted her head to the side.

“Two years ago, I found myself... Lacking. A woman has needs you know.”  
Nuhlis stared at Shepard from the corner of his eyes, his brow plates lifted in interest and curiosity.

“You would be surprised the things you can find here on the citadel. Did you know, there is a brothel that encourages interspecies intercourse?”  
Shepard peeked up at Nihlus, gaging his reaction. The large turian stopped walking and Shepard took a couple steps ahead of him and turned around to look at him.

“You are joking.”  
Shepard laughed again, her ruby coloured lips curling into a generous smile.

“Not in the slightest.”  
Nihlus crossed his arms over his chest and stared at Shepard, her hands tucked behind her back now as she watched him.

“And you have been there, obviously… What have you tried?”  
Nihlus felt dirty asking that question, his mandibles twitching in slight embarrassment at the words coming from his mouth. Shepard tilted her head to the side, her eyes glancing up to the ceiling as she seemed to be thinking it over.

“Well… I can tell you I never touched a volus or elchor, that’s just… Creepy.”  
Nihlus found himself laughing at her words, shaking his head slightly.

“Krogan are surprisingly shy about their anatomy. Asari are… just not my thing. Salarians are boney, but very gentle.”  
She paused talking, peering up at Nihlus and grinned at her next statement.

“Hannar are just, weird.”  
He choked, holding up his hand to her as he bends over coughing and laughing.

“You slept with a hannar?!”  
Shepard held her sides as she started laughing, tears forming in her eyes.

“Spirits, no! Your reaction was so worth it though!”  
Nihlus watched her, rubbing a hand over his cheek gently, his curiosity peeked.

“” Spirits”? So, you’ve been with turian then?”  
Shepard smirked slightly, spinning on her heels and walking a head of him, her hands folded behind her back.

“Turians are the best lovers.”  
Nihlus stared after her, her hips swaying tauntingly in front of him. He felt as if he was in his teens again, unable to control his hormones. He caught up to her easily and wrapped his arm around her shoulders as they resumed walking.

“Have you ever been with a human?”  
Her words made him jump slightly, his gaze shifting to peer down at her.

“No.”  
Her emerald gaze lifted and met his, her ruby lips curling into a slight smirk.

“Curious?”


	7. First Night

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So.... This is my first turian smutt.... Be gentle with me... Q~Q

Nihlus stared at Shepard, his grip tightening gently on her shoulder as his mandibles twitched. Shepard smiled up at him, taking his hand from her shoulder and held it in hers as she pulled him behind her. They soon took a turn and went inside one of the apartment complexes, Shepard still pulling Nihlus behind her as she leads him to her apartment. In the elevator she stood close to Nihlus, her body pressing against his side as she held his hand in hers, once they reached her floor she pulled him out and gently pressed her lips to his hand before leading him down the hall and into her home.   
Nihlus watched as Shepard let go of his hand and walked further into the living room, his eyes drifting around the room. A couch, table, no tv. His brow plates lifted as he glanced over in her direction as he heard a cupboard door squeak open.

“You can come in, Nihlus. I won’t attack you.”  
Nihlus laughed softly as he stepped inside, his talons tracing across the top of the couch as he looked down at it.

“You don’t spend a lot of time here, do you?”  
Shepard laughed softly, placing a couple spoon fulls of dextro-powdered coffee and then fills the mug with hot water. She picked up the mugs she was filling with coffee and walked over to Nihlus who had taken a seat on the couch and held the mug out to him. He took it with a grateful dip of his head and blew on the steaming cup, the smell of the coffee making his brow plates lift slightly.

“You keep this in your apartment?”  
Shepard laughed as she took a sip of her own steaming mug before setting it down on the table.

“I do have some friends, you know. They just happen to be not human.”  
Nihlus chuckled softly, taking a generous sip of the coffee before looking back at Shepard as she continued to stare at him.

“How many turians have you been with, exactly?”  
Shepard stared at Nihlus for a moment before answering, closing her eyes.

“Just one, actually. But I still stand by that you are the better lovers.”  
Nihlus’s mandibles twitched slightly, his brow plates lifting as he placed his mug down.

“Oh?”  
Shepard giggled softly, opening her eyes as she watched Nihlus.

“He was curious, young, very charming. He actually helped me pick the better Dextro coffee.”  
Nihlus felt himself be a little bit jealous as she spoke of the other turian, his brow plates lifting slightly.

“And how did that happen?”  
Shepard’s lips curved into a slight smirk, folding her hands across her lap as she leaned forward slightly.

“Took him to my apartment from the bar.”  
She winked at Nihlus who had rolled his eyes at her, his mandibles flaring in a childish grin as he hummed quietly. 

“Seriously though, he started talking with me and we got along very well. So, he asked to talk more with out horrible club music, so I brought him here since I lived closer. We talked, drank some more, and then I kissed him, and he took it farther.”  
Nihlus’s head tilted slightly as he watched her, his brow plates lifting slightly as he watched Shepard.

“Kissing? You mean when humans touch their lips together.”  
Shepard laughed softly and nodded some.

“Yes. The boy was very confused at first, but it didn’t take long for him take lead though.”  
Nihlus tilted his head once again, pondering over her words for a moment as he stared at the table in front of the couch. Shepard leaned forwards, reaching out and gently traces one of her fingers across the top of his mandible. 

“Care to try?”  
Nihlus lifted his eyes as Shepard traced his mandible, his green orbs resting on her lips as she smiled at him. 

“You seem confident in the possibility that I am attracted to you, Shepard.”  
She laughed softly, closing her eyes as she pulled her hand back and rested her head in her palm as she spoke again.

“Having your predatory eyes on me while I practice spared with the other crew members was a small hint.”  
Nihlus made a soft humming sound in his subvocals as he looked to the side, coughing gently as she chuckled.

“You pay attention to a lot of things around you even when doing something else.”  
He turned himself to look fully at Shepard, resting his arm on the back of the couch as he gently dragged his talons across her arm.

“I can see why they recommended you.”  
Shepard laughed softly, shaking her head.

“Hard work and effort gets you where you are, and where you want to be. Luck doesn’t exist.”  
Nihlus watched as Shepard frowned slightly as she spoke, looking back at him and smiling slightly at him, as she reached over and gently traced a finger across the top of is cowl. Nihlus hummed softly and closed his eyes as she did so, opening his eyes and looking at her carefully and watching her face as she watched her fingers trace across his cowl. 

He leaned forwards, placing his hand on her shoulder and pulling her to him, he placed his plated lips over hers. She made a noise of surprise as he did so, her eyes locking on his as he stared at her. Her plump lips turning up into a soft smirk as she placed her hands on either side of his face, gently tracing her thumb across the soft skin under his cowl and winning a soft purr from him. She closed her eyes as she giggled softly, lowering her arms around his neck and placing her hand on the back of his neck as she gently moved her lips against his plated ones, her lips molding against his. She giggled softly as she pulled back slightly and looked up at him.

“Close your eyes. Relax.”  
She laughed softly as Nihlus was rigged, his hand nervously resting on her shoulder. He laughed softly, closing his eyes.

“Sorry.”  
Shepard laughed again as she watched him, her hands tracing down the armor plates on his arms before reaching his hands and gently takes them into hers, moving them and placing them around her waist before returning her arms around his neck and gently kisses his lips again. The plates were hard against her lips, but she loved the feeling, the twitch of his mandibles gently feathered across her arms as she leaned into him, her tongue gently brushing against his lips and caused his eyes to open. 

He stared at her, his brow plates risen in surprise as he enjoyed the feel of her lips and tongue against his lips. He closed his eyes once again, his arms more confidently wrapping around her waist as he pulled her closer to him, his own tongue leaving his mouth to meet hers. Their tongues wrestling for dominance over the kiss as Nihlus grew more confident. 

When Shepard pulled back, she stared at him with a soft grin and stroked the back of his head and down his neck, her nails tracing across the soft skin under his cowl and he purred. She smiled at him and stood up, taking his hand into hers as she lead him into her bedroom. Once inside the room, she spun around and faced him, her hands swiftly unclasping his armor and it started to fall to the floor. Nihlus welcomed her taking the lead his hands fumbling clumsily with her dress as she removed his cloves and chest piece. A soft giggle left her as he growled in annoyance at the stubborn fabric of her dress, the leather refusing to let go of her skin, his talons digging into the fabric and ripping one of the dresses short sleeves. They both paused, Shepard’s eyes casting down to the rip.

“I’m… Sorry.”  
Shepard shook her head as she looked back at him, smirking as she went about removing the rest of his armor. 

“Don’t be sorry. I can always buy a new one. Sit.”  
She shoved him down, once his pants were removed, now completely naked and sitting on the foot of her bed. He watched with great interest as she took the still intact sleeve and slid it off from her shoulder, his eyes following the black fabric as it fell onto the floor. He reached out and gently traced his hand across her waist, sending a shiver up her spine as his wrought hand traced across her soft skin, he seemed almost fascinated with how soft it was. His other hand now running across her waist as he pulled her closer to him. 

She laughed softly, and his eyes finally lifted to meet her face, finally realizing that she wasn’t yet completely naked. He watched as she took another set or straps in her hands and pulled them off before removing the garment that covered her chest, his eyes widening some as he saw the skin underneath. His hands trailed up, gently cupping her breasts as he inspected the new area, his thumbs rubbing over her nipples and caused her to moan softly.   
When she moaned, he paused his movements and looked up at her. The sight of her biting her lip and her eyes closed made his plates stir. Shepard opened her eyes and smiled down at him as she reached out and traced her fingers over his mandibles and back towards his fringe, her fingers gently curling under it as she scratched her nails across the soft skin, causing Nihlus to purr loudly. He continued his exploration of her body, his hands tracing across her breasts and towards her back, wrapping his arms around her body as he pressed his forehead between her breast, indulging himself with her soft skin. She gently pat his shoulder as her fingers traced over his cowl.

“You seem to be enjoying yourself.”  
Nihlus chuckled deep in his chest as she spoke, nodding his head slightly as he nuzzled his head against her chest.

“Your skin… It is so soft. Warm.”  
Shepard found herself blushing as she listened to him speak, making a soft humming sound as she traced her fingers over the top of his cowl once again. He purred softly, letting her step back from his arms as she knelt in front of him. She placed her hands on his thighs, gently tracing her nails across the plates there. The leaned up slightly, pressing her lips against his again as her nails made soft circles around his legs and up towards his waist, her nails scraping the soft skin between his plates as she moved her fingers up. 

He hummed softly, opening his mouth and nipping gently on her lower lip and she moaned quietly, her hands gently gripping his hip spurs as she leaned into him. She moved her hands to his again, moving his hands onto her waist as she spun around and pressed her back into him. She gasped as he lifted her easily and placed her into his lap, his mouth falling to her neck as he gently nipped at the soft skin, her hips shifting at the bite and her back arching against him cause his plates to stir as he hummed in his subvocals. Her body pressed close to him as he continued to nip at her neck, his tongue occasionally lapping across her skin and tasting her as she moaned. His plates stirring with her sounds and soon enough his length had unsheathed from behind his plates, and was now hugged between her thighs.

Shepard blushed as she looked down to see what had appeared between her thighs, a small grin pressing her lips as she looked over her shoulders at Nihlus.

“You appear to be better at this then you think you are.”  
Nihlus glanced up at her, a light growl of arousal growing in his chest as his hands reached down and traced across her stomach before one of his large hands rested between her thighs and pressed against her panties. She gasped as his hand pressed against her center, and his mandibles fluttered against the skin of her neck as he grinned proudly for her sound. 

He started slow, making sure his talons did not hurt her, as he moved his hand against her panties. Slowing rubbing against her center, his free hand wrapping around her stomach as he held her close to him, her hips wriggling in pleasure against his hand as her thighs hugged his member. The rubbing action of her thighs causing Nihlus to gasp softly as he gripped her waist, his talons digging gently into her skin as he pressed his forehead against her shoulder as he tried to focus on moving his fingers against her middle. 

He had successfully turned Shepard into a gasping mess, his talons easily cutting the fabric of her panties away and they fell to the floor. He kept his arm around her as he lifted his head over her shoulder and peered down, careful of his talons as he tested the wet opening. When Shepard gasped he stopped, his eyes darting up to see if he had hurt her, but her face showed the opposite. Her eyes closed and head leaning back against his chest as she panted softly, and his mandibles flared proudly before continuing, one of his fingers slipping easily within her and she moaned out as her hips shifted and pressed into his hand. 

He moved his finger in and out of her, grinning as she wiggled and moaned at his touch, her thighs pressing together and shifting across his length only added to the arousal. Shepard reached up and wrapped her hand around the back of his neck, her nails scratching his skin gently as she held onto his neck, her fingers dancing across the sensitive skin under his cowl. 

He removed his hand from her center and gripped her hips on either side, quickly standing and flipping her over onto her back and lay her on the bed. Shepard squealed and giggled loudly at the action, gently slapping his shoulder as he grinned down at her as he loomed over her.

“You seem to be more confident.”  
Nihlus grinned down at her as he rolled his eyes, gripping her hips as he guided her legs around his waist.

“And eager to hear you more.”  
As he spoke, he angled his hips and guided his length to her entrance, teasing her as he just barely put weight into his hips, just barely pressing into her. Shepard gasped and cursed under her breath, her toes curling feeling his length press against her, when he didn’t move any further inside of her, she grumbled at him and mimicked a growl as she stared up at him. This won her a flutter of his mandibles and a quick jerk of his hips as he pressed inside of her, filling her, and she moaned loudly at the feeling of him. 

She moaned loud enough that Nihlus completely believed her neighbors heard her, the thought of getting caught with her in this position exciting him all the more. He pressed himself further inside of her, growling as he pressed his forehead against her shoulder, not stopping until he felt himself fully seated within her. Shepard gasped and panted under him as he waited for her to get used to him, the feeling of being full of him almost making her orgasm right there. 

Gasping for air under him, Shepard reached up and gently gripped his shoulder, her lips curling into a small smirk as she rolled her hips up into him and caused his to hiss in surprise. 

“Now you are asking for it.”  
Shepard giggled as Nihlus spoke, her hands reaching up and pulling his face down into an almost bruising kiss as she rolled her hips once again, encouraging his own movement as he now began to thrust into her. His movements were soft and gentle at first, his mandibles flaring as he gasped at how her body seemed to swallow him back up even as he pulled out of her, her body trembling in his arms from the pleasure.  
Nihlus gently bit her lower lip, tugging gently and careful not to cut her, his talons gripping her hips as he thrust into her. As his pleasure grew, so quickened his movements, his talons cutting the skin on her hips much like a cat scratch as he pounded into her, growling deep in his chest as she moaned his name. Her nails gripping his shoulder plates as her head dipped back into the sheets of her bed, her thighs hugging his waist close to her as her moans grew louder the faster he moved.

“Spirits…”  
She cursed under her breath and Nihlus grinned down at her, surprised when she grinned up at him from her position and hugged his waist even more and gripped his shoulder tightly before using his weight to flip them both over. They both moaned out loudly as Shepard landed on top of him, sheathing him completely within her and hitting the deepest places inside of her, her body trembling on top of him now as she rolled her hips. Nihlus stared up at her with wide eyes before grinning and sitting up, his arms wrapping around her waist as her arms wrapped around his neck, the both of them holding each other close as they ground their hips against one another. 

Nihlus growled deep in his chest as he bucked his hips upward into her, causing her body to bounce along his length and she moaned, her head falling back and Nihlus took the chance to wrap his mouth around her neck, holding her in place as he thrust roughly into her, harder, more demanding. His hand reaching up and tracing across the back of her neck before gripping the bun some how still intact at the back of her hair and gave it a rough tug, the tie snapping, and the river of fire red strands spilled down her back. Her lips curled into a smile as her hair was now loose, Nihlus pausing only a moment as he glanced behind her at the length and grabbed another hand full of it, holding it tightly as he kept his mouth around her throat. She was moaning loudly now, constantly trying to find a good grip on his shoulders as her body unraveled against him. 

He held her tight to him, thrusting as he breathed heavily against her skin, his talons digging into her hair and her hips as Shepard cried out his name, her body tightening around his member as she saw stars with her climax. Nihlus growled loudly, his teeth gripping her throat a little harder as he thrust into a couple more times before spilling inside of her, a deep feral growl in his throat as he held her tightly as they both rode out their orgasms.   
Carefully, Nihlus removed his teeth from Shepards neck, purring quietly as he licked at the small puncture marks as if apologizing. Shepard ran her fingers across his cowl as he rolled them onto their sides, watching as she pulled away from him, their liquids spilling down her thigh and grinned proudly as he looked up at her. 

“See?”  
She smiled, looking at him breathlessly.

“Turians really are the best.”  
Nihlus laughed as he leaned over and nuzzled into her hair, taking in her cent, she smelt like cinnamon. 

“As far as first human experiences are… I must say I am impressed you can keep up.”  
Shepard grinned at him and his words, laughing as she gently slapped his shoulder. She tucked herself close to him and he wrapped his arms around her, the both snuggling into one another as their new exercise sent them on the trail to sleep. Nihlus’s fingers absentmindedly curling his fingers in her hair as they slept.


	8. A Question

The next morning, Nihlus woke alone in bed, but he could hear muffled talking on the other side of the bedroom door, so he climbed off the soft mattress and walked over to the door. He was almost thankful the door was partially open, and tilted his head to hear better.

“Thank you for looking after him, Anderson.”  
Nihlus tilted his head more hearing the name.

“Not a problem, Elizabeth. He was very well behaved, you taught him well.”  
Nihlus’s brow plates lifted as he looked around the bedroom, listening to the conversation. His eyes caught on a set of folded pants on a chair beside the bed, when he investigated them, there was a note beside it. ‘I hope these fit you.’ His mandibles twitched in a slight smirk as he unfolded what appeared to be alliance sweatpants. Trying them on as he walked back to the door, they slipped on and fit almost perfect, there was even extra space for the spurs around his calves. He leaned against the wall, listening to the voices again.

“I have also heard of your new assignment. You are to be assigned to the SSV Normandy. With me.”  
Shepard laughed and Nihlus could tell she was smiling from the pitch in her voice.

“I will tolerate any human vessel to work under you, Sir.”  
Anderson laughed.

“I hope one day you can move on from the human bigotry, my dear. But it will be good to have you on board. I could use the competence.”  
“Maybe one day, but not today.”  
Nihlus tilted his head away from the door, his eyes closing as he rubbed the back of his neck gently.

“I will send you an email with the information once it has been confirmed, stay safe.”  
There were some other noises, Nihlus could only assume that Shepard gave him a hug, and then the sound of the door closing. There was a long silence before she spoke again.

“You can come out now. I know you were listening.”  
Nihlus laughed quietly as he opened the door of her bedroom wide and stepped out, his mandibles twitching as he smiled.

“You really do not miss anything.”  
Shepard smiled and laughed, her eyes trailed down some and her brow lifted, a small grin growing on her face. In his distraction of talking with her, he did not notice the very large varren now sitting directly in front of him, the surprise of it making him jump slightly.

“Spirits!”  
Shepard burst out laughing, holding her sides as she did. Nihlus looked up at her, then back at the now panting varren, hunched over itself with its tail wagging in the air.

“How in the name of the Spirits do you have one of these?”  
Shepard laughed still as she went to the kitchen and started making coffee.

“His name is Caneo. And I got him on one assignment, Akuze…”  
Nihlus looked over at Shepard, her movements pausing slightly when she spoke the name, his mandibles hugging tight to his face as he looked back down at the varren.

“He seems to be of a playful mood. Is he always like this?”  
Shepard smiled over at Nihlus, shaking her head.

“Only when we are here. Everywhere else he is very protective. He should have a stuffed pyjak around here somewhere…”  
Shepard disappeared from the kitchen, leaving Nihlus alone with Caneo. He looked about ready to jump on Nihlus when a faint squeaking sound came from past the kitchen, Caneo perked up, standing straight as an arrow. Another squeak came, closer, and he took off and Shepard’s loud squealing made Nihlus jump and jog over to see what happened. She was topped on the floor, Caneo on top of her as he tried to get the stuffed toy from her hands.

“Get off of me you crazy thing!”  
Nihlus laughed and walked over quickly, snatching up the stuffed toy and squeaking it once before tossing it across the room and onto the couch. Caneo tor off after it, growling playfully as he pounces it on the couch and began to chew on it. Nihlus grinned down at Shepard, offering his hand to her and helped her back to her feet. 

“My hero.”   
She laughed softly as he rolled his eyes at her, grinning as she walked over to the mugs of coffee and passed one to Nihlus.

“Are you excited? To go back to work, I mean.”  
Shepard looked at Nihlus over her mug as she took a long sip from it, one side of her shirt falling off from her shoulder and Nihlus stared at her shoulder for a moment before looking back up at her.

“I am. Though, I am sad that I might not see you anymore.”  
She smirked lightly as Nihlus’s mandibles fluttered. She could have sworn it was a turian way of blushing.

“I am sure we can find ways to see each other again, if that is what you wish.”  
Nihlus was taken back a little when she spoke. He honestly did not believe she would wish to see him again after last night, she made it seem as though it was a casual one night. Shepard smiled widely at him, laughing softly as she pulled her fiery hair over her shoulder, the length ending just above where her belly button was. 

“I respect you Nihlus, a lot. I would love to see you again. Maybe have a repeat of last night as well.”  
She smirked at him over her coffee, giggling as she watched him choke on his. 

“Truly? What about your other lovers?”  
Shepard rolled her eyes at him, taking another sip from her coffee.

“I tried something once, maybe twice. I wouldn’t call them “lovers”. Besides, I would much rather boast about how I can make a great specter purr at my touch.”  
Nihlus growled playfully and huffed at her, rolling his eyes as she started laughing at his reaction.

“You are definitely one of a kind human, Shepard. You sure you aren’t part turian, or krogan even?”  
Shepard laughed even more, shaking her head.

“All human. Well, as far as I know. I have been told my biotics are stronger than average for a human.”  
Nihlus hummed softly in his subvocals as he walked over to Shepard and wrapped one of his arms around her waist, the both of them turning to look at the couch as a loud taring sound echoed in the apartment. Shepard huffed as Caneo was sitting upright with half of the stuff pyjak in his mouth.

“I just fitxed that…”  
Nihlus lifted a brow plate at Shepards words.

“You did not just buy it?”  
Shepards laughed as she walked over to the couch and picked up the torn pieces and walked back over to Nihlus, tossing them on the counter.

“No. They don’t sell ones like this, and pyjak’s are his favorite plaything. So, I made him one. He used to have two, but I think he ate it when I wasn’t home.”  
Nihlus laughed quietly at her words, sipping his coffee as he watched her figure out how to piece the toy back together.

“So, you can mend things like that? What else can you do?”  
Shepard smirked as she looked over at Nihlus, clicking her tongue playfully as she watched him.

“You have learned something new about me. The deal is… you meet me as often as we can, and I will tell you something new each time. In return, you teach me about you, and how to listen to your subvocals.”  
Nihlus hummed quietly, thinking her propitiation over, his talons tapping gently against his mug of coffee before he walked over to her and gently buried his face into her hair, a quiet purr vibrating in his throat.

“Deal.”  
In the following two years, Shepard resumed her almost flawless record, working under Captain Anderson and his crew of the Normandy. She had grown fond of the piolet, his witty jokes and comments about their assignments always seemed to make her smile. The only other time she smiled, was when she received mail from Nihlus. The both had grown closer over the years, Shepard dared to say she loved him but never to his face. Meeting when ever they could, which was more often than not to both of their delight, the distraction they gave each other from their missions more than welcome.  
Each time they met, Shepard kept her promise and told Nihlus something else about her. He learnt she knew how to sing, she knew how to sew, she even knew how to cook and bake, she even knew how to dance. She didn’t flaunt in front of others she saw no point to it, but Nihlus was impressed. She had even made him a home cooked meal of dextro-food that tasted better then he had ever had before, she made a joke about him being her test subject, the joke ended with a wrestling match between the sheets.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Loading Docks, Citadel. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~  
“Shepard!”  
She paused in her step as the familiar voice called out to her, a large grin spreading across her face as she watched Nihlus running over to her.

“Spectre. To what do I owe the pleasure?”  
He hummed softly in his subvocals in a way she told her meant great affection, and she smiled at him as he folded his hands behind his back.

“It appears I will be accompanying you on this assignment of yours. The counsel informed me there was work done on the Normandy’s stealth systems and wished my expertise to accompany.”  
Shepard’s brow lifted slightly at his words, she knew he wouldn’t tell her the details of a lot of his missions, but he always used the words “my expertise” when it was something more serious.

“It will be a pleasure to have you on board, specter.”  
She smiled at him, picking up her bag of gear and stepping into the air lock of the Normandy, Nihlus following close behind her, and they waited for the airlock to open. They exchanged a quick touch of the forehead before the airlock opened, Shepard greeting Anderson before heading to her bunk.

“Commander, it’s good to be working with you again!”  
Shepard smiled slightly at the familiar voice, tossing her bag on her bed as she spun around.

“Kaiden, good to see you again. I trust your shore leave was good?”  
He nodded some, smiling brightly at her.

“As good as shore leave can get. It will be good to get back out there.”  
Shepard nodded to him and went about checking her gear. The lieutenant was sweet, almost too sweet for Shepard. He spoke often about his family back on earth, it was pleasant to listen to him and his pride for his family. Shepard finished putting her things away and patted him on the shoulder as she took a walk to the mess, looking over inventory before heading to the bridge. Once she arrived, Joker was there with his jokes.

“Hey commander, how’s it hanging?”  
Her brow lifted slightly, her arms folding across her chest.

“You spied on me, didn’t you?”  
Joker gasped over exaggerated and placed a hand over his chest.

“I would never! My commander deserves her privacy when sharing secret kisses with people!”  
Shepard rolled her eyes and shook her head, a small smirk on her lips.

“Oh, shut up, Jeff.”  
She could hear him laughing as she walked from the bridge, passing Anderson on her way and gave him a heart smile as she playfully saluted him on her way past. He gave the order to leave and they were on their way, Shepard bouncing into the jump of the ship as it left the dock and smiled at Pressly one her way past. As she walked through the ship she could hear people whispering about the spectre on board, and she rolled her eyes, she wasn’t sure if they were talking because they didn’t like it or because he was a turian. Shepard found that a lot of the Normandy’s crew was still bitter about the first contact wars, and had a distaste for turians.  
She found Nihlus talking with their medical officer, Dr Chakwas, and walked over to join them.

“If you have any problems let me know. We recently received the latest in medical supplies for turian care.”  
Shepard smiled lightly as Nihlus dipped his head in gratitude at the gesture.

“I appreciate it, thank you, doctor.”  
As Nihlus noticed Shepard walking over to them, he waved his farewell to the doc and turned to her.

“Commander.”  
She smirked up at him, folding her hands behind her back.

“You have caused quiet the stir around the ship, spectre. Are you always so popular?”  
Nihlus laughed as he motioned for her to walk with him.

“In some cases. Yes.”  
His mandibles flared in a broad smile as he looked down at Shepard.

“Jealous?”  
Shepard rolled her eyes at his words, grinning up at him.

“Hardly.”  
They both laughed softly, Nihlus pausing in his step and gently grabbed Shepard’s arm, pulling her into a side room with him.

“I hear the captain wants you to gear up soon, but before that, I wished to give you something.”  
Shepard tilted her head as he spoke, her brow knitting together in confusion. She watched as Nihlus reached into one of the ammo pouches on his armor and pulled out a small box, her eyes growing slightly wide at it but didn’t say a word as he began talking.

“You have given me the best years of my life Shepard, I wish to thank you for that.”  
Shepard smiled up at him, giggling nervously as he placed the box in her hands and cupped his around hers.

“I know it is not a normal human tradition, but once this is over, I wish to talk to you more about becoming mine. Only mine.”  
Shepard stared up at Nihlus, her ruby lips curling into a sly smile.

“Why, Spectre Kryik, are you asking me to be your bond mate?”  
Nihlus’s mandibles flared in surprise, making Shepard giggle again.

“Someone has been doing research on the side.”  
She laughed softly and smiled up at Nihlus, nodding slightly.

“Indeed, I have… And I would love nothing more then to be your bond mate.”  
His mandibles flared in a wide smile as he wrapped his arms around her tightly, holding her close to him as he nuzzled the side of her cheek before leaning back and stared down at her.

“I read somewhere that a male is to give his female a ring. But you seem to never wear anything on your hands, so I believed this to be more fitting.”  
As he spoke, he motioned to the box still in her hands and she carefully pulled it open. Her mouth dropped open as she stared at the necklace. 

“The pendant is carved from a rare mineral found on Palaven. It seemed more fitting then a ring in human traditions.”  
Shepard smiled broadly up at Nihlus, throwing her arms around him and kissed him with all her affection. 

“I love it.”  
She smiled and pulled the necklace from it’s box and he helped her put it on. It was a short chain, the long thin curved pendant dipping gracefully just above her collar bone. She pinched it between her fingers and played with it as Nihlus clasped it together, smiling up at him as she spun around and kissed him once again.

“Once this mission is over, we will talk more on the details.”  
He smiled as he brushed the back of his fingers across her cheek, purring quietly as he nuzzled her other cheek.

“Now go. The captain will surly call on you soon.”  
Shepard nodded some and kissed his mandible before running off to get changed into her armor. As she started dressing, she paused a moment and looked at the tags hanging from the side of her bag, a small smile on her lips as she traced her fingers across them.

“I hope you are happy for me…”  
She spoke as if her friends could answer her. Letting go of the tags, she quickly finished dressing, holstering her pistol on her thigh and checking over her sniper rifle as she made her way back to the bridge. When the door from the mess hall opened and she stepped out to the bridge, she placed her rifle on the holster across her back as she walked to the front of the bridge, Joker’s voice coming out over the coms. As she walked up to the front and stood behind him.

“All if green. Approach run has begun.”  
Shepard folded her hands behind her back as she watched.

“Hitting the relay in 3… 2… 1…”  
The ship jumped as they hit the relay, her stomach jumping with butterflies. After a moment, Joker checked everything.

“Thrusters… Check. Navigation… Check. Internal emissions sink engaged. All systems online… Drift, just under 1500 K.”  
Shepard smiled as Joker spoke out loud, closing her eyes.

“1500 is good, your captain will be pleased.”  
Shepard smiled as she heard Nihlus’s voice, opening her eyes once again and watched him as he left the bridge, giving her a small grin as he left.

“I hate that guy.”  
Shepard looked back at Jokers words, her brow lifting.

“Nihlus gave you a compliment… So, you hate him?”  
Shepard shook her head as Kaiden joined the banter.

“You remember to zip up your jump suit on the way out of the bathroom? That’s good. I just jumped us across the galaxy and hit a target the size of a pinhead. So that’s incredible.”  
Shepard ran a hand over her face as Joker spoke, rolling her eyes and grinning at him.

“Besides, spectre’s are trouble. I don’t like having them on board. Call me paranoid.”  
Shepard was about to do just that, but Kaiden beat her to it.

“You’re paranoid. The council helped fund this project, they have the right to send someone to keep an eye on their investment.”  
Shepard could feel Joker roll his eyes.

“Yeah, that is the “official” story. But only an idiot believes the official story.”  
Shepard shook her head again, speaking up.

“You always expect the worst, Joker.”  
The piolet scoffed and grumbled.

“Well, bad feelings are an occupational hazard. We don’t go anywhere with out a good reason, so, what are we doing here?”  
Shepard felt as though Joker was trying to fish, he hated being in the dark about things like this. He cared about the Normandy as if it were his baby.

“Joker! Status report”  
Shepard felt her back straighten hearing Andersons voice open over the com.

“Just cleared the mass relay, captain. Stealth systems are engaged. Everything looks solid.”  
Shepard zoned out for the rest of the conversation, closing her eyes as she said a silent prayer, something she always did as a mission was about to get underway.

“Tell the commander Shepard to meet me in the comm room for a debriefing.”  
Her attention snapped back hearing her name, her brow lifting slightly.

“You get that commander?”

“Great, you made him mad. Now I get to deal with it.”  
She reached over and flipped Jokers hat off his head before walking off, smiling to herself.

“The captain is always pissed off.”  
Kaiden stifled a small chuckle.

“Only when he’s talking to you, Joker.”  
Shepard shook her head as their banter slowly vanished, nodding to various people as she made her way to the comm room. She paused for a moment to have a word with Jenkins, calming him down, before finally stepping into the comm room.

“Commander.”  
Shepard smiled hearing Nihlus’ voice.

“Spectre. Where’s the captain?”  
He smiled at her, folding his hands behind his back.

“I wanted a moment alone with you before he came.”  
His bright eyes shifted from Shepard and towards the hollow on the wall of their destination, Eden Prime.

“What do you know of this place? Eden Prime.”  
Shepard shrugged slightly, shaking her head.

“Not much. They say it’s a paradise.”  
Nihlus nodded some, staring at the hollow before looking back at Shepard.

“The colony on Eden Prime is a big step for humanity, proving you can establish and protect colony’s outside the terminus system.”  
Shepard smirked slightly, watching Nihlus.

“What are you getting at?”  
She looked over her shoulder, hearing footsteps coming closer.

“I think it’s about time we told the commander what’s really going on.”  
Shepard looked back at Nihlus, his mandibles flaring slightly in a small smile.

“This is more then just a reconsents mission.”  
Shepard felt her brow raise, a small smirk pressing her lips.

“I was wondering what was really going on.”  
Shepard looked towards Anderson as he began speaking again.

“Nihlus is here to evaluate you.”

“Evaluate, sir?”  
Her emerald gaze looked towards her turian lover, her brow lifted as he nodded slightly.

“Your cadency for the spectre’s. I am here to evaluate you for acceptance. You will be the first human spectre, if everything goes well.”  
Shepard felt her jaw drop but she tightened it up quickly, looking towards Anderson.

“I wondered why he was there everytime I turned around. I assume this is good for the alliance?”  
Anderson shook his head, smiling softly as Shepard exchanged a playful smile with Nihlus.

“For all of humanity, Commander.”  
Shepard nodded slightly, looking back at Nihlus and smirked at him, Jokers voice cracking to live over the coms.

“Captain, we got a problem. Transmission from Eden Prime, sir. You should see this, Sir.”

“Pull it up on screen.”  
The three of them looked towards the hollow as the picture of Eden Prime vanished, a solider appearing and panic covered the screen. Shepard took a step forwards, looking from the vid towards Anderson, she could see his jaw clench. Nihlus’s mandibles twitched in contemplation as the vid ended.

“Everything cut’s out after that. No comm traffic at all. Just goes dead. There’s nothing.”  
Anderson clenched his jaw once more.

“Reverse and hold at 38.5.”  
Shepard’s gaze was locked on the image, her brow knitting together.

“Status report.”

“Seven minutes out, Captain. No other alliance ships in the area.”  
Shepards eyes remained fixed on the image, her emerald gaze unwavering.

“Take us in, Joker. Fast and quiet. This mission just got a lot more complicated.”  
Shepard finally pealed her eyes away from the image, looking over towards Nihlus as he spoke.

“A small strike team could move quickly with out drawing attention. It’s our best chance to secure the beacon.”  
Shepards eyes returned to the image, her stomach turning uneasily.

“Get your gear and meet us in the cargo hold. Tell Alenko and Jenkins to suit up, Commander. You’re going in.”  
Shepard looked at Anderson for a moment before looking back at the screen, her face grimacing before turning on her heels. She headed to the bridge and grabbed Kaiden and then Jenkins on their way to the cargo hold. She past by Nihlus on her way, pausing beside him as she gently took his hand into hers.

“Be careful. You hear?”  
Nihlus’s mandibles flared as he grinned at her, humming quietly in his subvocals as he dipped his forehead down and rested it against hers. 

“I always am.”  
Shepard closed her eyes and gave his hand a squeeze before letting go, staring at him a moment longer before rejoining her group.

“You’re the muscle in this operation, Commander. Go in heavy and head straight for the dig site.”  
Shepard nodded slightly, looking over her shoulder as Kaiden asked about survivors. Naturally she would to all she could for anyone they came across, it seemed a silly question.

“Nihlus. You are coming with us?”  
Shepard perked up at Jenkins question as the spectre walked past them, checking his pistol as he answered.

“I move faster on my own.”  
Shepard frowned slightly, Nihlus pausing at the drop point and looked back at her, giving her a reassuring nod before jumping out of the ship.


	9. Alone Again

The mission was supposed to be simple, a combat basic, get in and get out. Shepards gut was twisting ever since the transmission come through, the crazy looking ship, the sudden slaughter of almost everyone. Jenkins died on her watch, not three minutes into the mission, her anger boiling. The drones had it coming when she used her biotics to collide them into one another. She took Jenkins’ tags from his body, talking out loud when she passed them to Alenko.

“We’ll make sure to give him a proper burial when we get back to the ship… But I need you to stay focused.”  
He nodded once to her, taking the boys tags and sticking them into one of his armor pouches. When he finished, he saw Shepard had moved up a head of him, and he jogged to catch up. Shepard was beginning to really hate this mission, her gut twisting into even more knots as they moved forward. She had hope when they found Williams, if she had survived then others had a chance.

Pushing on they found a pair of scientists locked up in a research container, thankfully unharmed, even if the one was a little too psychotic for Shepards liking. As they moved further into the colony, Shepard couldn’t shake a feeling of dread that settled in her stomach. After their talk with the researchers, Shepard pulled out her sniper rifle and checked over the scope as they made their way up a small hill. A gun shot echoed a head of them and Shepard almost dropped her rifle as she looked up, her eyes wide. 

Nihlus had been a head of Shepard and her team this whole time, giving small feed back comments along his way as he checked things out a head of them. Her heart dropped as she jogged up the hill, her eyes scanning the field as those freaky pillars with what was left of some colonists started to move again. Shepard ignored them as Williams and Alenko opened fire on them, bringing her scope up to her eye and scanning slowly. She made one shot as a husk came into view and blocked her sights, the shot going straight through the husk’s skull and dropping it. When it dropped, Shepard felt her blood turn to ice in her veins. 

“Nihlus!”  
She jumped from her perch and ran through the field.

“Commander!”  
Kaiden called after her but she ignored him, ducking the arm of a thrashing husk and throwing it out of her way with her biotics. When she came to the small dock she froze, gasping for air as she stared at Nihlus laying face first in a pool of blood. 

“What the hell, Commander?!”  
She looked beside her as Williams came running up next to her, Shepards eyes trailing back to Nihlus as she walked over to him and quickly checked his pulse, but found nothing. On a closer inspection, she could see an entrance wound at the back of his head, her gut twisting enough to almost make her puke.

“A turian? You know him?”  
Shepard nodded slightly, tracing her gloved hand over his cowl before fishing for his tags. Kaiden and Ashley were talking about something, she couldn’t really hear them despite being right next to them. Her hands clumsily taking Nihlus’s gun from his hand and checking it over before holstering it on her other thigh. 

“Something moved! Behind those crates!”  
Shepard jumped up and grabbed Nihlus’s gun from her holster, aiming it angerly at the crates.

“Don’t shoot!”  
Shepard growled quietly as the human came out from behind the crates.

“What happened here?”  
Shepard spoke angrily, not in the mood for some scared civilian to get in her way.

“What? The turian? I-I didn’t kill him if that’s what you’re asking!”  
Shepard glared at him, her hand clutching Nihlus’s tags tightly.

“There was another turian here! They seemed to know each other, he called the other one Saren. When that one let his guard down, the other shot him in the back.”  
Shepard took a once over of the man, his eyes shifty, ringing his fingers together as he shifted uncomfortably under her gaze.

“Which way did the other one go?”  
Shepard got up into his face, grabbing hold of his shirt.

“H-he went that way!”  
The man pointed towards the tram, his whole body shaking.

“Thank you… Anything else we should know about?”  
The man trembled under Shepards emerald gaze, biting his lip as he quickly placed some grenades and something she didn’t recognize on top of a crate.

“Some of us had a smuggling ring here at the dock… These are all I got left, one of them top of the line, purely experimental.”  
Shepard heard Ashely grumble under her breath.

“You low life… We are out here risking our lives for you people, and you’re stealing from us.”  
The man held his hands up defensively.

“No one notices if a couple things go missing! No harm done!”  
Shepard stared down at him, her gaze making him feel a mere inch tall.

“Your smuggling stops, or Ill come back for you.”  
He nodded his head rapidly, holding up his hands as he backed away slowly as Shepard snatched up the grenades and the other piece, tossing the grenades over to Kaiden as she looked over the piece and they walked away, leaving the cowered behind the crates as he hid again.

“That was a little harsh, Commander.”  
Her eyes snapped over towards Kaiden.

“He deserved it. Along with most of humanity. We are an ignorant race, thinking we can do anything.”  
Kaiden made a face and shook his head as Ashley looked over at him with a puzzled look. Shepard put the piece in a pouch to look at later, jumping back in her step and drawing her pistol as the ground was shot at. Her emerald gaze lifted to find two more drones and she grumbled as she pulled the trigger, one of the drones free falling to the ground and exploding as the other was swallowed in an orb of blue and thrown into the wall.

“I, fucking, HATE drones.”  
Shepard shook her hand slightly, looking back over her shoulder one last time at Nihlus before continuing on. She couldn’t cry, there wasn’t time to cry. She cleared the tram of more synthetics, geth, slimly little bastards always showed up when they didn’t belong. Reaching the front of the tram, she looked back at Kaiden and Ashley as she hit the button to send them forwards, folding her arms over her chest as she took note of the way Ashley was staring at her.

“Do you have a problem?”  
Ashley glared at her Commander, her lips thinning slightly.

“I just don’t understand… How can you have such a hated for your own species?”  
Shepard lifted her brow, a small smirk growing on her lips.

“When this is all said and done, look into the Akuze file.”  
Ashley stared at Shepard confused, placing a hand on her hip as she continued speaking, Kaiden had taken a step back, not wanting to get caught in the middle.

“I have, Ma’am. The file says that the ground team was found faulty for the Thresher Maw attack on the camp, resulting in forty-nine of fifty people dead.”  
Shepard laughed, closing her eyes and drawing both pistols she now carried, peering down at the one she took from Nihlus with a gentle gaze before glaring up at Ashley.

“You are under the command of the only survivor of that mission, Williams.”  
Shepard lifted one pistol and aimed it at Williams.

“I told the truth, and I was put on probation, while the man truly behind it all walked free, even got another promotion for his “Good deads”.”  
Ashley took a step back when Shepard aimed the gun at her, her eyes growing wide.

“When I tell you that the file is wrong, then take my word for it. Humanity fucked me over, and I do not plan to let them do it again. So yes, I have a great distaste for humanity.”  
Shepard lowered the gun, glancing over at Kaiden before turning her back on them, eyes forwards toward the next tram. Ashley looked to Kaiden with a “what in the actual fuck” expression on her face and Kaiden shrugged his shoulders slightly.

“You asked.”  
Was all he said before Shepard looked back at them.

“Eyes forwards, ladies.”  
They moved up, standing on either side of the Commander, Kaiden mumbling something before pointing forward.

“Their setting explosives!”  
Shepard smiled lightly.

“Of course they are. They are trying to cover their tracks.”  
Shepard held up one of her pistols and looked down the sights, firing off a shot and hitting a geth priming one of the bombs.

“Let’s get to it, ladies! Don’t let those explosives go off!”  
Shepard jumped off the tram before it sopped moving, firing again over her head at an over pass and a geth fell onto the platform. Checking over the explosive she just shot past to make sure it was disabled, Shepard moved on to a next one she could see from the platform on the second level. Sprinting across the ramp to the second level, she slid to a stop and fired off at another geth, missing its main core but Kaiden covered her with an assault of shots from his rifle as she turned around and began disarming the second bomb.

Shepard hummed quietly to herself, thinking, as she stood from disarming the bomb, her eyes flicking to her omni-tool as it did a scan and she set off running again, across to the other side of the platforms second floor. She slid to a stop behind cover, laughing to herself as her shields powered down, drained from the bombardment of bullets.

“Has anyone ever told you that you are crazy, Commander?!”  
She laughed more at the voice in her ear, Kaiden giving her shit as she poked her head out and threw a geth into another and flung them both off the platform, turning her attention to the bomb next to her.

“Come now, lieutenant! There is no fun with out risk!”  
She could hear a loud groaning grumble in her ear and she smiled more.

“Some of us like you being alive, Commander!”  
Shepard wanted to say she felt the same, she wanted to say she liked living, but the words didn’t come. All she could think of was her friends and loved ones on the other side waiting for her to finally join them. She finished disarming the third bomb, looking back to her omni-tool as Ashley and Kaiden joined her, having finished off the rest of the geth in their current vicinity.

“One more…”  
Shepard looked around and jogged to the far side of the platform, smiling to herself when she spotted the last bomb and began working on it.

“Alenko, Williams. There were some geth down that ramp just over there, start clearing them out while I finish this, please.”  
The two nodded and stepped away from her, leaving her to finish disarming. Shepard hummed quietly as she could hear gun fire, tilting her head to the side as she pulled out a final wire to disarm the bomb completely and ran over to join her squad. She bounced on her feet and slid down the ramp as she threw a geth and husk off the ledge. Smiling up at Kaiden as he shook his head at her.

“I swear. If someone did not know you, they would never understand how you got promoted to Commander.”  
Shepard laughed as she shook her head.

“Such a sweet talker you are, Alenko.”  
Kaiden rolled his eyes, trying to cover the fact he was blushing at her words and Ashley found great amusement in his reaction.

“Is that all of them?”  
Shepard took a once over as they finished scouting the platform, holstering her pistols as she placed a hand to her ear.

“Normandy. Beacon in secured, waiting for evac.”  
Ashley and Kaiden both took a closer look at the beacon, Ashley tilting her head slightly.

“What the…? It wasn’t doing anything like that when they dug it up.”  
She turned away from it, wanting to talk to the Commander.

“Something must have activated it…”  
Kaiden stared and stepped a little too close, the beacon pulsing as something grabbed him and tried pulling him closer. Shepard peeked over Ashley’s shoulder as her gut thwited, her eyes growing wide as she saw Kaiden struggling something. She pushed past Ashley and jumped for Kaiden, grabbing him around the waist and quickly tossing him to the side. She tried to follow, but her mind was snatched, and she hunched over herself, her teeth grinding together as she gasped loudly. Her body was easily manipulated by something they couldn’t see, straightening like a board as she shut her eyes tightly, images flashing through her mind.   
The beacon hummed loudly, suddenly exploding as if it over loaded, knocking Shepard back into a roll and sprawling her out across the platform. Kaiden rushed over to her as Ashley checked the Normandy on their ETA. Kaiden felt his heart lift as Shepard was still alive, seeming as though she was in pain, but still alive.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Normandy Infirmary. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

When Shepard opened her eyes, she shut them again immediately as the light from the med-bay blinded her.

“Doctor Chawkwas! I think she’s waking up.”  
She opened her eyes again hearing Kaiden and slowly sat up, rubbing her face in her hands.

“You had us worried there Shepard. How are you feeling?”  
Shepard lifted her gaze and watched as Chawkwas walked over to her, spirits how she hated being in the med bay.

“Minor throbbing… Nothing serious. How long was I out?”  
Chawkwas sighed with relief before speaking.

“About fifteen hours. Something happened with the beacon I think.”  
Shepard could hear Kaiden sigh behind her, and looked over her shoulder when he began talking.

“It’s my fault. I must have activated some kind of security field when I approached it. You had to push me out of the way.”  
Shepard smiled slightly towards Kaiden, shaking her head slightly.

“You had no idea what you of happened. Don’t blame yourself.”  
Shepard jumped off from the bed and took a few test steps as she rubbed the back of her neck, not really listening to Chawkwas as she spoke more. Biting her lower lip.

“Shepard?”  
She jumped as a hand rested on her shoulder, looking up to see Anderson had entered the room. She stared up at him for a moment, smiling sadly up at him and he smiled back.

“How is our XO holding up, doctor?”  
Chawkwas smiled slightly at them, folding her arms across her chest.

“All the reading looks normal, I say the Commanders going to be fine.”

“Glad to hear it, Shepard, I need to speak with you. In Privet.”  
Shepard nodded slightly, watching as Kaiden and the doctor filed out of the room.

“Sounds like things got pretty wrought down there, you sure you’re ok?”  
Shepard shook her head slightly, rubbing her eyes with one of her hands.

“So much doesn’t make sense… The beacon, the attack. The beacon… I saw something from it.”  
Anderson lifted his brow.

“Saw something?”  
Shepard sighed heavily.

“I know. It sounds like I’ve finally gone off my rocker. I saw death, destruction… Synthetics… I think.”  
Shepard shook her head and sighed heavily, closing her eyes as her hands folded over the necklace around her neck.

“Noting makes sense.”  
Anderson placed his hand on Shepard’s shoulder.

“Take a moment, Shepard. Breath.”  
She did as she was told, taking a deep breath before talking again.

“I assume the report has been sent to the council.”  
Anderson nodded, his face becoming tense.

“It has. They requested a hearing about what happened. Nihlus is dead, the beacon destroyed, and the geath are invading. They want answers.”  
Shepard growled quietly, closing her eyes again.

“I didn’t do anything wrong… Hopefully they can see that.”  
Anderson shook his head slightly, still holding his hand on her shoulder.

“I will stand by you and your report, Shepard. You are a damned hero in my books. I am here because of the other Turian. Saren. He’s a spectre. One of the best. If he’s working with the geth, it means he’s gone rouge.”  
Shepard looked up at Anderson, frowning slightly and sighed, nodding slightly.

“Why would a spectre go against the council? Aren’t they supposed to be the top shit of all the galaxy’s races?”  
Anderson laughed quietly, shaking his head.

“I don’t know, but a rouge spectre means trouble, especially Saren. And he hates humans.”  
Shepards brow lifted slightly, a small smirk on her face.

“Should I give him a medal?”  
Anderson rolled his eyes and gave her a slight glare, she held up her hands and silently apologized.

“Well, he didn’t go to Eden Prime because of humans.”  
Anderson nodded slightly.

“You are right. Saren has allied himself with the geth. I don’t know how, I don’t know why. But it has something to do with that beacon.”  
Shepard looked down at the floor, playing with her necklace as she thought it over.

“The beacon. I told you it showed me a vision, or something…. Maybe Saren was after the same thing?”  
She looked up at Anderson, his arms folded across his chest in thought as he listened, a slight nod of his head as he was leaning towards her words and their possibility.

“All I know is Saren is dangerous, and now he has the secrets of that bacon and an army of geth. He will not stop until he has wiped humanity from the face of the galaxy.”  
Shepard nodded slightly. As much as she did not mind that idea, she herself was still human, and in turn cared for at least some of her own species. She straightened her self and looked at Anderson, her lips thin.

“I will find some way to bring him down.”  
Anderson smiled lightly watching her and he placed his hand on her shoulder, giving them a gentle squeeze.

“I now you will… We should be getting close to the citadel. Head up to the bridge and tell Joker to bring us into dock.”  
Shepard nodded slightly and watched as Anderson left. She gave herself a moment, taking a deep breath before heading out of the med bay. She was passing my Kaiden when he looked up from his conversation in the mess and spotted her.

“Commander!”  
She stopped and spun around as he walked up to her. 

“I wanted to thank you, for what you did. If you hadn’t, I might not be here.”  
Shepard smiled and shook her head some.

“There has been enough loss for this crew. I wasn’t about to lose another.”  
Shepard smiled at Kaiden and was about to walk away again, but he caught her hand in his and placed something inside, her brow lifting slightly in curiosity.

“You held onto these pretty desperately, I figured you would want them back.”  
Shepard opened her hand and tried to muffle the gasp that left her lips as Nihlus’s tags clicked together in her hand. A small smile pressing her lips as she closed her hand around them again and nodded towards Kaiden.

“Thank you, Kaiden… This means more then you know.”  
She gently touched his arm before walking away, leaving the lieutenant blushing in the mess. Shepard held the tags tightly as she walked to the bridge.

“Ah, Commander! Just in time. I was about to bring us is.”  
Shepard smiled at Joker as he spoke, looking back down at the tags in her hand everything else around her becoming muffled as she stared down at the name carved into the tags.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So... I wasn't actually sure if Turians used "dog tags" or something of the like.... But in this one they do!! lol


	10. New friends, Old Friends

Shepard grimaced at Udina as he left his office with Anderson, rolling her eyes as she folded her hands over her chest.

“This is why humans should never be politicians.”  
She looked over at Ashley as the soldier shook her head, smirking slightly as she motioned her head forwards, her squad leaving Udina’s office. The transit ride to citadel tower was quiet, Ashley staring at her commander as the red-haired women kept her eyes straight. Something about her made Ashley uncomfortable, maybe it was the fact she had such a strong distaste for humanity? Or maybe she just didn’t like it when people pointed guns at her. She really couldn’t pick.  
Making their way up the steps to the council, Shepard paused as her head tilted to the side, watching two turians go at one another.

“I need more time! Stall them!”  
Shepard’s brow lifted as she took a couple steps closer to them, placing her hands on her hips.

“Stall the council? You can’t be serious. Your investigation is over, Garrus.”  
The turian, Garrus, groaned as his superior walked away, throwing his hands in the air before noticing Shepard standing on the side lines.

“Commander Shepard? Garrus Vakarian. I was the officer in charge of finding evidence against Saren.”  
Shepard smiled slightly, her emerald gaze looking the turian over once before speaking to him.

“You seem to have a distaste for Saren.”  
She made motion towards the turian that walked away.

“Your conversation got pretty heated, from what I could see.”  
Garrus looked after the other turian, scoffing quietly before looking back at Shepard.

“Something about Saren rubs me the wrong way, but I couldn’t get anything solid. He’s a spectre, everything he touches is classified.”  
Shepard laughed quietly, closing her eyes. Of course, it was going to be a pain in the ass, nothing was simple anymore.

“Commander. The council should be ready for us.”  
Shepard looked over her shoulder as Kaiden spoke, rolling her eyes slightly at him before looking back at Garrus.

“Pray the Spirits that they listen to reasoning, yes?”  
She gently tapped Garrus’s shoulder as she walked past him, his mouth gaped slightly at her words. He stared after her, his brow plates lifting slightly as he watched her spin around and give him a once over again before looking at her male teammate and scowl at him, saying something he couldn’t hear. He shook his head and rubbed the back of his neck as he went about his other duties.

Shepard climbed the steps and stood before the council with Anderson, her emerald gaze lifting to the hologram of the turian, Saren. She could hear Udina yelling, cursing about how Saren hated humanity, then Anderson spoke, and everything went to hell. Shepard’s eyes never leaving Saren, she had a face now, a face to hunt and to hate. When his hologram dissipated, Shepard snapped back into reality and looked towards Anderson as they walked off to the side, Udina reprimanding him about his history with Saren.

“Just tell me what I need to do to get that scaly bird venerable.”  
Udina looked at Shepard as she spoke, scowling at her.

“That C-sec officer, Garrus. He seemed like he could be on to something.”  
Shepard looked back at Ashley as she spoke, nodding approvingly.

“Any idea where to find him?”  
Udina pondered a moment, clicking his tongue.

“I have a contact within C-sec. His name is Harkin, he might know were Garrus is.”  
Shepard looked over at Anderson as he rolled his eyes.

“Harken is a drunk, spends most of his off time in Cora’s Den. Got laid of from drinking on the job last month!”  
Shepard smiled lightly at Anderson.

“It’s the only lead we have. I promise not to believe most of what he says.”  
Shepard glared at Udina as she spun on her heels and left the two men, Ashley and Kaiden following behind her as she left and hailed a transit car.

“Why is it that no matter where we go, there is always a place like this with girls shaking their ass and men drooling over them?”  
Shepard laughed at Ashley as she spoke when they reached Cora’s Den, shaking her head slightly.

“It’s not that bad, Williams. Well… If you can get over the horrible music and smell. They do serve rather good drinks.”  
Ashley and Kaiden both looked at one another before looking back at their Commander and Kaiden opened his mouth to speak but was cut off by another voice.

“Shepard!”  
Ashley and Kaiden stopped dead in their tracks as they watched a young looking asari dancer jump off the stage above the bar and landed into the ready arms of their Commander. The asari giggling like mad as Shepard held her in a bridal fashion.

“Long time no see, sugar! Where you been!?”  
Shepard shook her head and set the asari down on her feet and smiled at her.

“I’ve been working, Arie. Working right now, actually.”  
The asari took this moment to look Shepard over, giving an approving nod.

“You always did look best in armor, sugar. Where’s that handsome turian fellow? He workin’ with you again?”  
Shepard felt a sharp pain in her chest as the asari asked about Nihlus, a small sad smile spreading across her lips.

“No, Arie. He’s not with me, he is no longer in active duty.”  
It took a moment, but when the asari clued in she gasped loudly and cupped her hands over her mouth, frowning deeply.

“I’m so sorry, sugar. You need help with anything, and you just ask!”  
Shepard smiled lightly.

“Actually. I’m looking for Harkin.”  
The asari made a face.

“Harkin? Yeah, he’s here.”  
As she spoke, she pointed over her shoulder towards the back wall.

“Thanks, Arie.”  
Shepard stepped around the asari dancer as she made her way to the back. Pausing once again as a familiar face showed up.

“Fist told us to take you down if you showed up, wrex.”  
The two krogan stood in front of each other, blocking each others’ paths.

“You can tell fist, I’m coming or him.”  
Shepard lifted her brow as the krogan in red armor began to walk away, bumping into her.

“Out of my way hum—Shepard!”  
Ashley and Kaiden looked at once another again before watching their commander shriek as the large kragon pulled her into an almost bone crushing bare hug.

“Wrex! Breathing! I like it!”  
Wrex laughed loudly, punching Shepards shoulder affectionately.

“What are you doing here? Come to drink your sorrows away?”  
Shepard laughed quietly, shaking her head.

“I’m on duty, Wrex. And you know damn well that I haven’t drank that much since you had to take me home over your shoulder.”  
The large krogan roared in laughter, clapping his hands together once as he nodded.

“Good times. Good times. What are you doing here then?”  
Shepard motioned behind him, pointing at Harkin.

“I need to talk to that guy.”  
Wrex tilted his head some, grinning.

“Need backup?”  
Shepard smirked as she stepped around Wrex and grabbed a seat, setting it down next to Harkin and seating herself down.

“You Harkin?”  
The balding middle-aged man looked over at Shepard and whistled.

“Now don’t you look sexy in that alliance get up. If there were more soldiers like you, I would have joined the army instead of C-sec.”  
Shepard rolled her eyes slightly, checking over her shoulder for a moment to make sure Wrex was still there.

“Listen, Harkin. I need a hand here. I’m looking for a turian, Garrus Vakarian?”  
Harkin tilted his head to the side.

“Vakarian? You must be part of Anderson flock. Yea, I know where he is.”  
Shepard lifted a brow, waiting for more as Harkin took a large gulp of his drink.

“Looking for a new turian lover, Shepard? Since, you know, the other one died.”  
Shepards body went ridged, her eyes widening. She didn’t need to turn around to know Ashley and Kaiden were staring at her in stunned silence, not daring to say anything. Shepard stood from her seat, swallowing hard to try and swallow the lump forming in her throat. 

“Wrex.”  
As she spoke his name, the large krogan pushed her behind him and grabbed Harkin by the collar of his shirt, a low rumbling growl in his throat as he dragged Harkin out of the bar. Shepard and her squad following closely behind. Harkin was kicking and yelling as the krogan dragged him outside, swatting desperately at his hold on his shirt. Once they stepped outside, Wrex checked over the railing and nodded as if deciding something, then, in once swift movement switched his grip on Harkin and held the man over the railing by his ankle.

“What the fuck?!”  
Shepard looked over her shoulder for a moment at the bar door to see if anyone followed and when she was satisfied no one had, she leaned on the railing and stared at Harkin. His face starting to turn red from all the blood rushing to his head.

“Harkin… You should know better then to insult me when my krogan is around.”  
Shepard placed her head in her hands as she leaned on the railing.

“I’ve known Wrex for a long time. I don’t think he likes people insulting his friends. Do you, big guy?”  
Wrex grumbled before speaking.

“No, no I don’t.”  
Shepard smiled lightly as she looked back at Harkin, shifting her weight on her feet.

“Now… Garrus?”  
Harkin looked like a fish attached to the end of a hook, shrieking for him life.

“Alright! Alright! He went to Doctor Michel, down in the wards! That’s all I know! I swear!”  
Shepard made a soft humming sound as she looked at Wrex, nodding slightly.

“I believe you.”  
Wrex pulled Harkin back onto the safe side of the railing, setting the terrified man down and they all watched as he ran away as fast as his drunk legs could carry him.

“Thank you for the help, babe. I’ll give you a call if I need help soon, yes?”  
Wrex nodded as he grinned.

“Damn straight, you always take me to the best places Shepard.”  
Shepard laughed softly, kissing Wrex on the cheek before motioning for her squad to follow her out. They walked through the lower markets and started their way up the steps when Shepard paused in her step and turned to look at her two crew members.

“Ask.”  
Ashley held up her hands and made a face of “hell no” while Kaiden rubbed the back of his neck and looked every where else but his commander. She smiled at their reaction, shaking her head as she began walking again.

“I met Wrex six months after Akuze. I hired him to help me with a couple jobs I was sent on when I was allowed back into service.”  
Ashley and Kaiden followed close behind their Commander and listened as she spoke. 

“Wrex introduced me to a few other contacts I know, then I met Arie. I helped her get her job. Not the most glamorous job, I admit, but it is much better then a lot of things out there.”  
They walked through the markets, Shepard waving towards a couple of the vendors as they past, her hands folding behind her back as they walked through the observation deck, passing the stairs towards Flux. 

“I know a lot of people on the Citidel. Even have an apartment here… Which I should probably get back to after we fetch Garrus.”  
She checked her omni-tool as spoke, tilting her head slightly before stopping in front of doctor Michel’s clinic. She glanced at the door, then looked back at her team.

“Ready?”  
As they nodded, Shepard opened the door, her eyes being drawn to Garrus as he knelt and scooted his way just behind a short wall. Mercs arguing with Michel.

“What the? Who are you?!”  
Shepard drew her pistol as the merc grabbed Michel and held her by the throat. Shepards brow lifting ever so slightly.

“Why… Hello.”  
She smiled as she spoke, Garrus flipping around the corner and shooting the merc holding Michel. Shepard smirked lightly as she shot at another, hitting him between the eyes. Ashley and Kaiden rushing inside as they finished off the last two. Shepard placed a hand on her hip and holstered her gun as she walked over to Garrus.

“Nice shootin’, rex.”  
Garrus’ brow plates lifted at Shepards words, his head cocking to the side as she stared at her completely confused. His reaction made her laugh.

“You ok, Doc?”  
Shepard looked towards Michel as she spoke, smiling lightly at her.

“Yes. Thanks to all of you.”  
Shepard folded her arms over her chest.

“Why were these merc’s after you?”  
Michel rung her fingers together, sighing.

“They were trying to find out what I knew about the quarrian.”  
Shepards brow lifted.

“Quarrian? What quarrian?”  
She glanced at Garrus as she spoke, and he shrugged his shoulders.

“She came in here injured, asking about the shadow broker. She said she had information about Saren and the geth. So, I directed her towards fist.”  
Shepard rolled her eyes and sighed dramatically.

“Why does fist always have to be involved…. For once, I would really like I is I did NOT have to drag my work life into Cora’s Den.”  
Shepard watched as Garrus’s mandibles flared in a grin at her words, chuckling to himself.

“Thank you for your help, doc. You take care of yourself, and message me if you get anymore trouble.”  
Michel nodded and smiled wide, thanking them again, and Shepard made her way out of the Clinic, Garrus following close behind.

“Commander, I want to come with you on this.”  
Her brow lifted as she watched Garrus, matching their pace to talk to her.

“You really want to bring Saren down, don’t you?”  
Garrus grunted quietly, nodding.

“I have my reasons. Saren is a disgrace to my people!”  
Shepard smirked slightly, closing her eyes a moment.

“Welcome a board, Garrus.”  
Garrus’s mandibles flared at her words, shocked, then smiled as he patted her shoulder.

“You wont regret this, Commander.”  
Shepard laughed quietly as she nodded.

“I know I wont. Ashley, head back to Citadel Tower… I’ll com you if anything comes up.”

“Aye aye, Ma’am.”  
Shepard watched as Ashley diverted from the course with them then checked her omni-tool, grumbling quietly as she sent a message then made a call.

“Sheparrrrrrd.”  
Garrus lifted a brow plate at the voice on the call and Kaiden snorted at the way the krogan sounded when he elongated Sheaprds name.

“Wrex, darling, sweetie, babe.”  
There was a pause.

“Who are we killing?”  
Shepard laughed as she shook her head.

“Would you like to join me in my shit storm of taking down Saren? I will help you get into Fists’ office to complete your bounty on him.”  
There was a loud grumbling humming sound before Wrex spoke again.

“Sounds like one hell of a party, Shep. I’ll meet you at the doors.”  
Shepard smiled and hung up the call, turning to look at Kaiden.

“Kaiden, please join Ashley at citadel tower. I’ll bring you both back up to speed when we meet up again.”  
Kaiden groaned but nodded, giving Garrus a once over before leaving. Garrus and Shepard walked in silence until they reached the walkway to Cora’s Den, Shepards lips curling into a large smile as she saw the large krogan waiting.

“Wrreeeeex.”

“Sheparrrrrrrd.”  
She giggled quietly as they paused at the doors, tilting her head side to side before taking hold of her pistol.

“Ready boys?”  
They both laughed, the door suddenly opening, and a bombardment of bullets rained down on them. Shepard squealed once as a bullet just barely missed her chest piece, bouncing off her shield. Wrex laughed loudly at her reaction before stepping in with a charge and downing three men in one go, Garrus and Shepard following in. It took moments to clear the bar, and less time to kill fist. Shepard groaned and bitched the whole time they ran back the way they came and killed the reinforcements, then down the alley to find the Quarrian. 

When they found her, Shepard shared more of her colourful vocabulary as they killed the assassins Fist had set her up with instead of the Shadow Broker. Once they were finished, there was even more colourful language, Shepard bitching about how nothing can ever be easy. It made the quarrian laugh, Shepard was a little crazy when she teamed up with Wrex, but in a loveable, laugh till you cry, kind of way.

Back at Udina’s office, the quarrian had introduced herself as Tali, and that she had recently come of age to start the pilgrimage for her species. When she played the audio log from the geth she had collected, Shepard couldn’t help but feel a great fondness for Tali, as she had given Shepard everything she needed to start the hunt for Saren.

“Oh, the council is going to love this.”  
Shepard looked over at Udina as he spoke, rolling her eyes unconsciously as she watched the arrogance ooze from him. 

“I will arrange another meeting with the council with this evidence. Commander, meet us there.”  
Shepard nodded slightly, watching Udina pull Anderson with him and sighed quietly.

“So, Tali.”  
Shepard spun around to the quarrian and smiled brightly.

“Since you helped us with this, care for a little adventure on your pilgrimage? Who knows, maybe we can find something you can take back to your fleet.”  
Tali giggled softly at Shepards enthusiastic behavior, nodding her head.

“It is like you read my mind, Shepard.”  
Shepard nodded and told Tali to collect what ever things she had with her and informed her which docking bay the Normandy was at to meet them there. As Shepard watched Tali run off, her omni-tool blipped and she quickly brought the tool up. Her lips thinned out and she sighed.

“Alright boys… We need to make a quick stop before heading to the tower…”  
Garrus lifted a brow plate at Shepard as she spoke and Wrex laughed.

“Did your baby sitter quit?”  
Shepard rolled her eyes and grumbled.

“Yes… And left the door open.”  
Wrex stopped laughing and quickly looked worried, Garrus still confused as he followed the two out as they made a run for the transit and took a cab to the apartment district. 

“Mind telling me what we are looking for, Shepard?”  
Shepard stood on the street for a moment, tilting her head to the side before looking at Wrex. They both looked back at Garrus before walking forward.

“Caneo.”  
Shepard said the single word, not giving Garrus anything else, as they entered the apartment building. They took the elevator to her floor and paused just out side the elevator, Shepards head dropping as she sighed as a very loud girlish scream came from the end of the hall.

“What the hell was that?!”  
Wrex laughed as Shepard lifted her head and removed her glove from her hand, placing her index finger and thumb in her mouth and blowing, a loud whistle sounding from her lips. There was a long pause and then another squeal, Shepard put her glove back on and placed a hand on her hip, looking back at Garrus and tilted her head slightly before grabbing his arm and pulling him into the middle of the hall.

“Stand there.”  
Garrus stared at Shepard confused for a moment until he looked down the hall and cried out loudly as he was suddenly tackled by something large and heavy. Shepard and Wrex laughed loudly as Garrus wrestled with the heavy varren now on top of him. After a moment, Shepard clapped her hand against her thigh and it climbed off from Garrus, the stunned turian being helped up by Wrex.

“Garrus, meet Caneo.”  
As Garrus got back to his feet, he looked over at Shepard as she spoke, staring down at the large varren sitting next to her, his tail wagging.

“That… It’s yours?!”  
Shepard laughed and nodded, petting Caneo on the head before walking down the hall in the other direction a few feet then closing a door and locking it tight before walking back to the elevator and shooing them all inside.

“Caneo refused to leave me when I was stuck on Akuze. We’ve been together ever since. And since I lost his baby sitter… He now needs to come with us.”  
Wrex laughed quietly as Caneo chewed on his gloved hand playfully, Garrus watching the playful varren, wondering if it was actually useful as a combat animal at all. His suspicions confirmed as soon as they stepped out of the apartment building, Caneo’s body became ridged and straight, focusing on one thing and behaving like a proper war dog.

Caneo came with them when they went back to the council, remaining with Wrex and Garrus at the base of the last flight of steps. They watched and listened as Shepard handed the councils words back at them with a simple phrase.

“It was a turian Spectre who betrayed this council, and it was a human who exposed him. I have earned this!”  
Wrex grunted and grinned as he watched the turian councillor shut up and think for a moment. When all was said and done, Shepard was made a spectre, and Garrus watched in slight awe as the human beamed success.


	11. Curiosity

Garrus made himself at home next to the mako, helping himself with the calibrations of it’s performance. He was content, finally content, despite being on a mostly human vessel. It did not take much time when they left the citadel to go after Benezia’s daughter, Liara, and Garrus could see the annoyance on Shepards face the moment the girl opened her mouth. They were on course to Feros, a human colony that supposedly had some geth related issues.  
Garrus didn’t realize how long he was working on the mako until something large collided with his leg, making him look down to see Caneo wagging his tail up at him and panting like he just ran a mile. Looking closer at the varren, Garrus took note of the ball now between his feet, his head tilting as he picked it up and stared as Caneo started bounding back and forth.

“He wants you to throw it.”  
Garrus almost just out of his plates at the sound of the voice next to him, placing a hand on his chest as he looked over at Shepard who was now grinning and laughing quietly at his reaction.

“Spirits, don’t do that.”  
She laughed more now, shaking her head.

“Sorry.”  
Garrus stared over at Shepard a moment longer then he had intended too, staring at her lips. When she motioned back at Caneo, he finally tore his eyes form her.

“The ball. He wants you to throw it.”  
Garrus’s brow plate lifted but he did as instructed, tossing the ball across the bay and watched as Caneo tore after the now bouncing projectile, tripping over his feet as he chased it around the room.

“What in the…?”  
Garrus watched, his mandibles flared.

“It’s called fetch. Humans do it with a lot of pets on earth.”  
Garrus glanced over at Shepard again then back t Caneo as he had finally caught the ball and charged back towards Garrus, putting the ball at his feet again.

“So… Throw it and he brings it back?”  
Shepard laughed and nodded.

“Pretty much. Not all pets are a fan of it. But Caneo loves it. Good for me, cause it wears him out.”  
Garrus chuckled quietly at her words, picking the ball up again and throws it just a little bit harder this time to give the ball more bounce. Caneo chasing after it as Garrus looked back at Shepard.

“I haven’t had a chance to say this, Commander. But thank you, for bringing me with you.”  
Shepard looked from Garrus and watched as Caneo tripped over himself, almost catching the ball, then chased after it again.

“It’s good to have you here, Garrus. I missed having a turian on board.”  
Garrus’s brow plated lifted.

“Missed it? You’ve worked with a turian before?”  
Shepard laughed and looked towards Garrus.

“I worked on a couple turian warships the past couple years.”  
Garrus’s mandibles flared wide as his jaw gaped, his brow plates lifting.

“Really? I never guessed you one to volunteer for that kind of experience, Commander.”  
Shepard laughed again, leaning up against the mako as she watched Caneo run back over with the ball for Garrus to throw again.

“Really. After Akuze, I found myself needing a break from humanity.”  
Garrus threw the ball again before looking back at Shepard, his head tilting slightly.

“I read the file C-sec had of Akuze. The reports anyways. They seemed to conflict each other.”  
Shepard smiled lightly.

“Which report did you believe was more correct?”  
Garrus watched her for a moment, folding his arms across his chest as he closed his eyes and thought back for a moment.

“I believed more in your report, then I did the captains.”  
When he opened his eyes, he watched as Shepard smiled wide and closed her eyes as she rested the back of her head against the mako.

“I mean, your report was complete and consistent. His was not, it had holes, gaps that did not make sense.”  
He watched as she opened her eyes and stared above her, licking her lips before speaking.

“This is why I like you turians… You actually think on things, instead of jumping feet first with your emotions.”  
Garrus’s mandibles flared as he smiled at Shepard, chuckling quietly.

“You make it sound like you would prefer a turian mate, over a human.”  
Shepard tensed and Garrus knew he had said something wrong. His brow plates lifting.

“It’s a joke, Commander. I don’t mean to offend.”  
Shepard closed her eyes and smiled lightly, shaking her head.

“None taken, Garrus.”  
She smiled over at him as she pushed off the mako and clapped her hand against her thigh, Caneo running to her side with his ball in his mouth and they both stepped into the elevator, Garrus’s eyes never leaving her until the door finally closed.

~~

The next morning, Garrus felt extremely awkward as he found himself staring at Shepard more then he had before, a soft grumble leaving his throat as he looked down at his dextro meal in front of him as he took a seat in the mess. 

“Commander, a word?”  
Garrus lifted his head slightly, hearing Ashley’s voice, and watched as the chief ran up to Shepard.

“What can I do for you, chief?”  
Garrus leaned back in his seat, folding his arms over his chest as he couldn’t help but watch this.

“I wanted to ask you, about what happened on the citadel.”  
Shepard’s brow lifted slightly, folding her hands behind her back.

“I’m afraid you will have to be more specific, Williams. A lot happened on the citadel.”  
Ashley sighed and closed her eyes for a long moment before looking back at Shepard.

“You know what I mean. I mean what happened with Harkin.”  
Shepard’s face went ridged, her body getting tense.

“Oh.”  
Garrus’s brow plate lifted as he watched Shepards reaction, his head tilting slightly to get a better angle for hearing them.

“Is what he said true?”  
Shepard shifted on her feet, nodding.

“Part of it, yes.”  
It was Ashley’s turn to go ridged, her stance becoming slightly more aggressive.

“How? Why? You are one of the best soldiers in the alliance. How can you… Pick that over your own people?”  
Shepard smiled, almost too sweetly as she took a step close to Ashley.

“You want to be careful what you say, Ashley. My personal life, my partners, are none of your business, nor your concern. I felt better connected to that man then any human ever since Akuze. So, you can shove your view on interspecies relations and shove it right up your ass.”  
Garus’s mandibles flared hearing Shepards words, looking down at his food and picking at it as Shepard stormed past him after shoving Ashley out of her face.

“It’s hard to have a privet conversation with aliens who have extremely good hearing, isn’t it?”  
Garrus looked up to see Wrex sitting down in front of him, a light nervous chuckle leaving him as he picked at his food again.

“I have no idea what you are talking about.”  
Wrex barked out a laugh, shaking his head.

“I know damn well you could hear that conversation just as well as I could.”  
Garrus looked up from his food and stared at the large krogan, his brow plated pushing together as he leaned forwards in his seat.

“Tell me… What is Shepards secret? Does she have an alien fetish or something?”  
Wrex barked out in laughter again, shaking his head.

“More like a turian fetish.”  
Garrus’s brow plated lifted as high as they could go, leaning back in his seat.

“How do you think she knows about the better dextro foods? Dumb luck?”  
Garrus looked back down at his plate of food, a humming sound coming from his throat as he finally realized the quality of the food.

“Interesting. But she seems to not like the topic, why?”  
Wrex leaned forward on the table, tapping one of his talons on its surface.

“You didn’t hear this from me… But Shepard used to be in a relationship with a turian specture, Nihlus Kryik. The relationship was very hush, well, until recently when he boasted about wanting to ask a female to be his bond mate.”  
Garrus felt his mandibles flare so far out it hurt, his jaw dropping slightly.

“The turian even went through the trouble of making sure his family and clan accepted her. Got her some fancy stone and everything.”  
Garrus sat frozen, staring at Wrex as the krogan spoke.

“You heard none of this from me, turian. Shepard would shove my ass into the air lock if she knew I said anything.”  
Garrus nodded hurriedly as he snapped back into reality.

“Of course. I will not say anything and let her when she is ready.”  
Wrex nodded and stood up, leaving Garrus to finish his food. Garrus finished his plate and went back to the mako console once he had disposed of the remains, his mind whirling with the new information. He hands hovered over the console when he heard Shepards voice coming from the engine room, watching as Caneo came into the bay and ran around like an excited pup. 

He chuckled quietly as he watched the varren make himself dizzy and drop to the floor. His eyes trailing over to see Shepard walking to the elevator, his eyes catching the glint of a silvery metal around her neck. His mandibles pressing tight to his face as he inhaled sharply. He found himself growing more and more curious about her, what she did in her spare time when she had it, what her life was like, what makes her smile, what makes her sad.   
She was apparently a type of women to make even the most respectable of turian spectre’s go through the hardships of having her accepted in turian cultures, even recognized as a turian bond mate. His mandibles flicked as Caneo had run up to his feet and rested his head against Garrus’ thigh, his brilliant blue eyes staring down at the silver striped varren as the beast huffed and dropped to it belly and fell asleep next to him. 

“Garrus, Wrex! We hit Feros in under an hour, suit up and get ready.”  
Garrus tilted his head as Shepards voice rang out over the intercom, chuckling as Caneo lifted his head for a split second before falling asleep again.


	12. Secrets

Feros was more of a shit storm then Shepard had expected. With not only the geth, but the thorian thing, Exo-Geni trying to cover it up, the colonists. She sighed heavily, sitting at the desk in her room as she read over her report. Her head hurt, first beacons giving her visions, then syphers being shoved into her brain to understand it, she felt like a tossed salad. She rested her forehead against the cold surface of her desk, groaning as a knock sounded on her door.

“Come in.”  
She didn’t lift her head, the cold surface of her desk felt too nice.

“Commander?”  
Her eyes drifted to the side, staring at the taloned feet standing next to her, and she smiled.

“Garrus, what can I do for you?”  
She heard him chuckle quietly and she sat up, her brow arching as he held a tray of food.

“You can eat something. I have not seen you leave your room since we got back, I thought you might be hungry.”  
Shepard smiled brightly at him and nodded, Garrus set the tray on her desk.

“How do you feel?”  
Shepard shrugged as she picked up the fork and jabbed the meat portion on her tray and looked it over.

“I feel like I’ve been hit with cannon fire from a turian cruiser. How are you feeling?”  
She laughed quietly as Garrus smirked at her, humming quietly in his subvocals with amusement.

“I am worried for my Commander, of course.”  
Shepard laughed at him and smiled, leaning back in her seat as she forgoes the meat for the time being and picked up a piece of something green from the side and popped it in her mouth.

“What’s on your mind Garrus? Your subvocals are dancing all over the place.”  
Garrus’s mandibles flared, his eyes widening slightly as he stared at her before dropping to her neckline. Wrex was wright. Under her armor, you can’t see it, but now it was plain to see. The graceful dip of the curved stone Nihlus had given her added a certain grace to her features, accenting her skin tone. Garrus stared longer he had intended and Shepard glanced down and touched the pendant.

“That… You want to know.”  
Garrus hummed thoughtfully, nodding.

“I will not pry into what you do not wish to share, Shepard.”  
She smiled up at him, quietly pondering for a moment.

“I wasn’t told what it meant. It was given to me just before a mission, I don’t even know what the stone is called.”  
Garrus smiled at her, a series of clicking like sounds coming from him. Shepards head tilted to the side as she stared at him.

“I think my translator just glitched.”  
Garrus laughed, loudly.

“Sorry, no, I told you the stones name. I don’t think there is a word for it in human words.”  
Shepard nodded thoughtfully and smirked slightly.

“Well, if I heard you right, there defiantly isn’t a word in human words.”  
They both laughed for a moment, Garrus’s eyes now stuck on the thin stone, his subvocals humming quietly in thought.

“Garrus. Ask. Your subvocals are all over the place with questions.”  
His eyes darted up to her, rubbed the back of his neck.

“Is it true? You had a turian lover?”  
Shepard only nodded.

“He was a spectre?”  
She nodded again.

“It was Nihlus… Saren killed him.”  
Shepard smiled slightly, nodding once more, before closing her eyes and crossed her legs over one another.

“Saren will get what is coming to him. When it’s over… I will finally be able to face his mother again.”  
Shepard stared to the side as she rubbed the side of her face with the back of her hand.

“You met his mother?”  
Shepard smiled and nodded.

“I did. She was hesitant at first, which you would expect. But… After some hard work, she started to see I was good with her son. Nihlus wasn’t always accepted by his fellows, always so reckless.”  
Garrus watched as Shepard smiled, it was a sad smile, but still a smile as she spoke about Nihlus. Nodding silently as his subvocals told Shepard he was sorry for her pain, and she looked over at him.

“Nihlus taught me a great deal, not just about turians. I sent his tags to his mother, I haven’t heard back form her y-“  
Shepard was cut off at that moment as her omni-tool flashed with a message, her brow lifting slightly as she pulled it up and smiled. Her eyes glossing over and Garrus moved over to her for comfort, placing a hand on her shoulder.

“She wants to talk soon… She wants to talk about something Nihlus wanted for me…”  
Garrus peered down at the message, a small smile forming on his face as he bent down and gently nuzzled the side of Shepards head. Realizing what he had just done, he jolted up right and stared down at Shepard with wide eyes, and she him. They both stared at one another for a moment before Garrus looked away and coughed nervously.

“I should… Ah… Go. Lots of work to have done still.”  
Garrus left her room quickly, her emerald eyes staring after him with wide shock. She looked down at the message once again before closing it, resting one of her hands on her chest as her heart pounded against her ribs. Her eyes lifted once more to her door where Garrus had left, her brow furrowing slightly as she tried to understand her reaction to him.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~The Mess~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Garrus dropped down at the table, staring at his mug of dextro coffee.

“Someone is brooding.”  
His eyes lifted to see the young quarrian standing in front of him.

“I don’t brood, Tali.”  
She giggled quietly and sat down, resting her elbows on the table.

“But you are.”  
Garrus stared at her mask for a moment before sighing and rested his forehead against the table, grumbling under his breath.

“Could it be you are conflicted with something?”  
Garrus scoffed, closing his eyes.

“You could say that.”  
Tali smiled under her mask, tapping her fingers against it’s sides as she watched the turian.

“Could it be… You are confused about Shepard?”  
Garrus’s head shot up at her comment, staring wide eyed at her.

“No! What?! Why would you ask that?”  
Tali laughed at his reaction, pointing at him.

“Everyone can see it. You stare at her almost the same as the lieutenant does.”  
Garrus’s brow plate lifted high, his eyes glancing over at Kaiden who had now entered the room.

“And how does he stare at her?”  
Tali smiled once again, resting her head on her hands.

“Like he wants to see her out of her armor.”  
Garrus felt a growl rumble in his chest, gasping quietly as he looked at Tali. He could feel her grinning at him and he groaned.

“And how exactly do I look at her the same way?”  
Tali shrugged, tilting her head to the side.

“You respect Shepard, more then he does. You are understanding of her, listening. When she talks to Kaiden, all he does is stare at her body. I don’t think he even listens to her.”  
Garrus laughed at her words, shaking his head as he watched Kaiden settle in at the table with a tray of food and he leaned forwards, reaching across the table and gently took hold of Tali’s elbow.

“I have a question to ask. How would you go about… Comforting someone who has lost someone special to them?”  
Tali’s head tilted to the side slightly, her helmet tilting down as she hummed in thought.

“Just there. When you lose someone important, it feels like you have a hole inside of you, that no one can understand. It is hard. If it were Shepard… I can’t imagine how she can do it. She is unable to show anything but strength to her crew. If she was dealing with the loss of someone special, I can only imagine the sadness is eating away at her.”

Garrus leaned back in his seat, his eyes drifting over to Shepards quarters, his mandibles flickering in thought as his subvocals hummed loudly. His eyes drifted down as he felt something large land in his lap, his brow plates lifting as he watched Caneo lay his head in his lap. His mandibles flared in a small grin as he reached down and pet the varren on top the head, his eyes drifting back towards Shepards quarters as they opened. He watched her cross the room, smiling back at her as she looked at him, his eyes drifting to Kaiden and glared as the human was staring at Shepard’s ass as she walked past. He sighed silently and closed his eyes.

“Oh, Commander!”  
His head lifted and looked towards the voice, his mandibles flaring as he watched Shepard holding onto Liara’s shoulder to steady her. It would seem they bumped into one another, and Garrus’s jaw hung open as he could have sworn that Liara was blushing as she stared at Shepard.

“It seems our Commander is desired by many in the crew.”  
Garrus looked over at Tali, her helmet turned towards the show as well. Garrus grunted and closed his eyes, rubbing his hand across his face as he groaned.


	13. Instincts

Shepard sat at the mess table, tapping mindlessly on her omni-tool before sighing quietly and closed her eyes. She had just come back to the ship from dealing with Noveria and her head throbbed as she thought back on the events. Her heart hurt for Liara, watching her mother die was probably not one of the things she signed on for, even if she knew her mother had turned into a raving lunatic working with Saren and his ideals.

“You ok, Shepard?”  
She opened her eyes and smiled slightly at Kaiden.

“Shepard? Such an informal way to address your commander.”  
Kaiden smiled sheepishly, dipping his head slightly.

“Sorry, commander.”  
Shepard waved a hand, dismissing the apology.

“Don’t worry about it. I feel like not being commander today.”  
She groaned as she sat forwards and rubbed her face in her hands, closing her eyes again.

“I read the report. It seemed like things got rough, you doing alright?”  
Shepard laughed softly and tilted her head to the side slightly.

“You should be asking Liara that. I doubt anyone would be ok after watching their mother die, let alone be part of killing her.”  
Shepard sighed heavily and looked back down at her omni-tool, bringing up an email and began typing a response to it.

“I’m sure Liara is fine. She already made it clear she had no connections with her mother when she joined Saren.”  
Shepard shook her head.

“That does not mean she is not feeling her loss, Kaiden. Someone can only put up a brave face for so long, until they finally need to snap.”  
Kaiden watched Shepard as she spoke, nodding at her words.

“Is that how you feel, Shepard?”  
Shepard looked up from her omni-tool and looked at Kaiden, her brow lifting.

“Care to elaborate that sentence, Kaiden?”  
Kaiden rubbed the back of his neck as he took a nervous breath.

“What I mean… You are the commander of the Normandy. First human spectre. You lost your family at Mindoir, lost your whole squad at Akuze, and even lost someone you cared about recently.”  
Shepard stared at Kaiden blankly as he spoke, her brow still lifted as she waited for his point to be made.

“You are a symbol for humanity. Symbols aren’t allowed to break down in front of those under their command.”  
Shepard stared at Kaiden a moment longer before looking back down at her omni-tool, her pink lips curling into a deep frown, chewing the inside of her cheek.

“You’re right, they’re not.”  
Her frown vanished and she stood up from the table, staring over at Kaiden.

“Good day to you, Lieutenant. I will talk to you again later.”  
Kaiden frowned as he watched Shepard leave the mess and make her way to the med bay, groaning as he sunk into a seat and mentally beat himself up for messing up that conversation. Kaiden lifted his gaze just in time to watch as Garrus rounded the corner, bumping into Shepard, his hands resting on her shoulders as they exchanged silent greetings and he felt his chest tighten with jealousy as he watched Shepard beam as soon as her gaze met that of the turian. When they parted, Shepard continued her way into the med bay, Garrus looked over at Kaiden who was now glaring at the turian.

“Can I help you, Alenko?”  
Kaiden shook his head some, still glaring at him.

“How can you possibly think she will like you?”  
Garrus felt his brow plates lift high at the words, his mandibles flaring.

“I do not assume anything of her, unlike a certain naive human I know.”  
The men stared at one another for a moment longer before Garrus rolled his eyes and walked away from Kaiden, grumbling under his breath about how stupid the human was for his words. 

~~~

When Shepard finally returned from checking on Liara she went to the docking bay to check on Wrex. The large krogan was spending time with his favorite shotgun, smiling at Shepard as she walked over and sat down on some crates near him. 

“Sheparrrrrrrd.”  
She laughed at him, shaking her head.

“Wrex. How are things?”  
The old krogan tilted his head side to side, grumbling quietly. 

“Oh, you know me, I’m just waiting for the next mission I get to go shooting people.”  
Shepard laughed and glanced across the docking bay and stared at Garrus as he played with Caneo and worked on the mako, smiling lightly.

“You like him.”  
She jolted and her eyes went wide, looking back at Wrex as her cheeks turned pink.

“W-what? Get your eyes checked, old man.”  
Wrex laughed and put his shotgun down, folding his arms across his chest as he looked at Shepard.

“I’ve known you long enough to know when you have the look of liking someone, and turians seem to be your thing.”  
Shepard smiled slightly, her eyes trailing back over at Garrus. Watching as Caneo jumped up and placed his large feet on his breast plate and licked his face, making her giggle at the scene.

“It’s ok to like him, you know.”  
Shepard frowned now, watching Garrus as she spoke.

“Is it? I just lost someone close to me, close enough to wish as bond mates… His mother even wants to continue with the ceremony, even though Nihlus is gone.”  
Wrex stared at Shepard, his brow lifting slightly as he stared at her.

“You were very excited to hear about the ceremony when she last emailed you before Eden Prime. Even though it was only a possibility of happening, you had high hopes.”  
Shepard shook her head, closing her eyes tightly.

“I was looking forward to it, so much, but what do I do now? I cared about Nihlus so much… But Garrus… It’s like…”  
Wrex watched as Shepard buried her face into her hands, groaning loudly in frustration.

“It’s like it’s instinctual?”  
Shepards head shot out of her hands and looks at Wrex, her eyes wide and lips parted. He laughed quietly, walking to her and took hold of her hands.

“Elizabeth.”  
She bit her lip as he spoke her first name, holding his hands as he stared at her with a very serious yet gentle expression.

“Have the ceremony. Even though Nihlus is gone, the ceremony was not only for him, or you, it is important to his mother as well.”  
Shepard looked down at their hands, nodding slightly, as she dipped forwards and rested her forehead against his, shutting her eyes tightly again as she took a few deep breaths as she regained herself. She leaned back to sit up right once she was free of accidently bursting into tears, smiling at Wrex as she nodded again.

“Alright… I will message her when I go back to my quarters and tell her I wish to continue.”  
Wrex smiled widely at Shepard and patted her shoulder before taking a step back and allowing her to jump off the crates. He watched as she crossed the room and pat Caneo on the head before speaking with Garrus, smirking as it took no matter of time to have her giggling at his words. Wrex smirked as he picked up his shot gun again and resumed cleaning it, his eye-catching Ashley staring at him.

“What do you want, human?”  
Ashley held up her hands, smirking.

“Nothing. It just seems you and the commander share a different relationship then you would expect… For a krogan.”  
Wrex rolled his eyes and shook his head, mumbling.

“Not going to tell me?”  
Wrex looked back at her. She had walked closer, obviously not dropping the topic and Wrex groaned.

“I met Shepard when she was hurting over that excuse of a trial you humans put on after her mission on Akuze. She needed help, I helped.”  
Wrex went back to cleaning his gun, hearing Ashley snort.

“That looked more like “help” from where I stand. You care about her.”  
Wrex grumbled and glared over at Ashley.

“Drop it, human.”  
Ashley grinned at him, folding her arms over her chest.

“If I had to guess, I would say you are the one who is in love with her.”  
Wrex closed his eyes, gripping his shot gun tightly and trying his best not to unload it’s rounds into her. He slowly opened his eyes and glared at Ashley, putting his gun down and getting up close and personal, shoving his face into hers as he shoved a finger against her shoulder.

“Shepard is the closest thing I may ever have to a child. Now back off human, or I will end you.”  
Ashley took a step back from the large krogan and held up her hands in surrender. Her eyes trailing over to Shepard and watched as she leaned against Garrus as Caneo jumped onto her and threatened to tip the women over. Ashley looked back at Wrex, his eyes softer as he looked at Shepard, before returning to her station and returned to her terminal.


	14. Face Paint

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So... I do realize that this chapter could have some holes filled... But possible flash backs are fun! And yes... I changed up the face paint a little bit because having the whole of Nihlus's face paint on Shepards face would actually look funny. I did a sketch... It looked funny... So! I hope I did a good enough description to get the general image down! <3

Shepard chewed her lower lip and played with the loose ends of her hair as it hung over her shoulder and not in a bun, and stared at her console, her foot tapping nervously. A knock on her door making her squeal and jump out of her skin, a deep laugh from the other side of the door making her roll her eyes.

“You alright in there, Shepard? You have been locked in there for hours.”  
Shepard rolled her eyes again and grumbled, unlocking her door and opening it from her console, letting Wrex in.

“What can I do for you, big guy?”  
The large Krogan shrugged his shoulders as he watched Shepard fidget in her seat.

“There is a gathering of concerned folk outside your room. None were brave enough to see how you were doing.”  
Shepard looked at her clock, squinting her eyes as if to see it better.

“How long have I been in here?”  
Wrex tilted his head and stared at the ceiling for a second, thinking.

“About 10 hours. I think. Ever since the council told you about Virmier at least.”  
Shepard hummed quietly, lost in a different thought as Wrex spoke. The flashing of an incoming message making Shepard jump out of her seat and point at the screen and Wrex stared at her with a confused expression.

“What in the quad has you so damn jumpy, Shepard?”  
He walked over to the screen and peeked at the message and its sender.

“Oh.”  
He looked back at Shepard and she was frozen staring at the screen, he laughed silently.

“Want me to read it first?”  
Shepard nodded so quickly it looked like her head was about to fall off, nervously running her hands threw the long strands of her hair as she watched Wrex sit in her seat and read over the message. He hummed once or twice, making shepard even more nervous and she started to chew on her nails, pacing back and forth. 

“Well, kid.”  
Wrex spun around in the seat.

“It seems, the turian Mses. wants it done as soon as you are able. Says she has a design for you, since you are human and funny shaped, based off the Tridend colony face paints.”  
Wrex looked back and watched as Shepard sat down slowly on her bed, staring wide eyed at the wall, her fingers curling in her hair as she took in a deep breath.

“This is really going to happen… Isn’t it?”  
She looked over at Wrex and he nodded slowly, laughing softly.

“She also says that they can come to you, says she knows how busy specture’s can be.”  
Wrex spins around again and looks at the message, tapping a finger against the screen, finding his place.

“Says here, that if you can meet them, there is a turian curser leaving her station soon, that she can arrange all the right people to be there. If you still want to go through with it. She will send you the location where to meet them if you reply with a yes.”  
Shepard watched Wrex as he finished reading and spun back around, smirking at her as he got up from his seat and walked over to her, sitting down on the bed as well.

“I’m scared…”  
Wrex reached over and grabbed her hands from her hand and gently pat them, making a soft humming sound, and the door opened. They both looked up to Liara, Kaiden and Garrus, standing in the door way, their brows lifting. Shepard laughed as Wrex let go of Shepards hands.

“Stop ease dropping, you nosey bastards. Nothing is happening here, and your commander hasn’t gone insane, yet.”  
Garrus laughed softly, shaking his head as he walked inside the room.

“Don’t you need to be sane first, Shepard?”  
Wrex roared in laughter as Shepard gasped and placed a hand over her chest.

“Vakarian! Are you implying that I, your commander, have been insane since I met you?”  
Garrus lifted his hands up, palms facing the ceiling as he tilted them up and down, grinning.

“Some where along those lines, maybe.”  
Garrus winked at Shepard and she couldn’t stop the laughing that came from her, holding her sides as the three laughed. Liara and Kaiden standing outside the room and looked at one another, shaking their heads as if they would never understand what just happened. Shepard stood up and walked over to her console, staring down at the screen for a moment before looking back over her shoulder at Garrus, smirking slightly before leaning over and typing a few things and hitting send.

She rung her fingers together and looked back at everyone, taking in a deep breath as she stared down at her feet.

“Shepard, you alright? You look nervous.”  
She looked up and smiled at Liara who had now entered her room, watching her with worried curiosity, and Shepard shook her head slightly.

“I am… Nervous, and excited.”  
Liara stared at Shepard with confusion, about to open her mouth to speak when Shepards console flashed with a new message and she spun around to look at it. It took a moment for her to turn around again, closing her eyes as she held her hands tightly together against her chest before speaking, her eyes opening as she looked at Wrex.

“9 hours, and we will be able to meet.”  
Wrex bellowed out a laugh and clapped his hands once before standing up.

“Great news! Try not to stay awake counting the hours. I hear it hurts like a bitch.”  
Shepard winced and glared at Wrex. 

“I did not need to know that.”  
Wrex laughed again, stopping when a loud cough was heard and they all looked towards Kaiden who was standing in the door way and leaning against the frame.

“What are we all so happy about?”  
Shepard rolled her eyes and smiled some, waving her hand and silently telling Wrex to keep his mouth shut.

“Nothing. It will be a surprise.”  
She smiled up at Garrus and winked at him playfully as she patted Liara and Kaiden on the shoulder as she left her quarters, folding her hands behind her back as she made her way up to the bridge. Garrus, Liara, and Kaiden all turning towards Wrex and he held his hands up.

“Don’t look at me. I’m not saying shit.”  
Wrex walked past them all and got into the elevator before he could get attacked with questions. Waving at them all as the doors closed and they rounded the corner to watch him.

~~~~~~~~~~~~ 9 hours later ~~~~~~~~~~~~

Shepard chewed on her thumb nail as she watched the large turian cursor come closer through the Normandy’s side window.

“Uh, Commander? Can you stop bouncing please? It’s very distracting.”  
Shepard looked over at Joker and stopped all movement she had going on, her hand dropping to hold onto her hair. She had braided the fiery stands and the length now sat just below her breast.

“Sorry, Joker.”  
She looked back out the window and chewed the inside of her lip, watching as a docking tunnel came out and latched on to the Normandy’s haul.

“Want to remind me what we are doing here? Instead of investigating Virmier I mean.”  
Shepard waited patiently for a moment before looking at Joker.

“Because I need this.”  
Shepard began walking away from Shepard, smiling at Garrus as he was making his way towards her and stood with her in front of the airlock doors.

“Shepard. Going to tell us what we are doing here yet?”  
Shepard laughed and shook her head.

“You all are so nosey.”  
Shepard smiled up at him and reached up, gently touching his arm for a second before the airlock doors chimed and opened. Shepard smiled wide as an older turian women stood in the door way, and rushed over to her, the turian female opening her arms and wrapping them tightly around Shepard.

“Little Lizzie. It is good to see you.”  
Garrus watched the interaction, his mandibles flaring out in surprise at how gentle the females voice was.

“I am sorry I have not stayed in proper contact with you, Ma’am.”  
The elder turian made a slightly annoyed clicking sound and peered down at Shepard, holding her shoulder firm.

“Now what have I told you about that. Even though he is gone, you still have to call me that!”  
Shepard laughed nervously, looking at the floor.

“Sorry, mama Kryik.”  
Garrus felt his jaw drop, staring wide eyed.

“Now, come with me dear. We do not have long. I was barely able to put this together on such short notice.”  
The turian, Nihlus’s mother, wrapped her arm around Shepards shoulder and started to pull her along.

“Joker! I’ll be back in maybe 1 hour!”  
Shepard called over her shoulder just as the airlock door closed and Garrus stared wide eyed and glanced over at Joker to see he had the same expression on his face.

~~~

Garrus tapped away at the terminal next to the mako, checking the time every ten minutes. A small groan leaving his throat as he rubbed his hands across his face.

“Time will not magically move forwards even if you wish it.”  
Garrus looked over at Wrex as the old krogan walked over to him, a smirk on his face.

“How can you be so calm? Someone close to you is doing something no one knows about!”  
Wrex laughed hard and loud for a split moment before looking at Garrus.

“Who says I don’t know?”  
Garrus stared wide eyed at Wrex, his mandibles flexing as he clenched his jaw, looking back at the terminal.

“Be calm, boy. She will be returned safe and, mostly, unharmed.”  
Garrus grumbled under his breath as he looked at Wrex again.

“What do you mean “mostly?”  
Wrex laughed again, shaking his head.

“You saw the necklace, you know parts of her history. You figure it out.”  
Wrex waved a hand at Garrus and began to walk away from him, the both of them looking up as the Normandy’s VI chimed out that the commander had returned to the ship and Wrex grinned, turning around as he looked at Garrus.

“Why not go up and see for yourself?”  
Garrus’s brow plate lifted as he walked away from the terminal and jumped into the elevator, hitting the button more then once as if it would go faster. He did not need to go far, loud gasping and murmurs heard behind the panel to the mess as he climbed out of the elevator. He quickly rounds the corner, stopping in his stride as he stares at Shepard and his eyes widened as his mandibles flared so far, they hurt. 

“Will you stop touching it? It still hurts!”  
She laughed as Tali touched Shepards face, gasping before clapping her hands and giggling softly. When Shepard caught sight of Garrus, she looked at him full on and he could not help the low purr that left his throat as he saw her face. Her tanned skin was now stained with bright white paint, it’s design altered slightly to fit her face better, but there was no mistaking the elegant curves of the turian colony paint now staining her face. 

“I take it you approve?”  
Garrus shook his head and walked towards her, reaching out and gently ran his thumb along the paint lining her jaw. He noticed the edges were red with irritation and he took her hand, pulling her with him as he pulled her to the med bay and sat her down on one of the bed. She tried to protest but shut up when she saw the serious look in his eyes, gathering up some medi-gel and started to apply it to the fresh paint.

“I am sure you were told to put gel on it as soon as you got back on board…”  
Shepard stared up at Garrus as he put some medi-gel on his fingers and began to gently run his fingers along her skin.

“I was. But I was attacked as soon as I came on board. It was a little had to move.”  
Garrus hummed quietly in his subvocals as he listened to her, focusing on applying the gel. He started at her jaw line, the paint starting below the corner of her lips in a small point and gradually became thicker, ending at her hair line. When he finished with the other side of her jaw, he moved on to her forehead, tracing the pointed oval shape on her forehead and across her brow as the pain reached out across her forehead just above her eye brows and came back down to hug just under her eyes much like a white mascara. 

Shepard watched the seriousness in Garrus’s eyes as he applied the gel, smiling up at him as she waited patiently for him to finish. When he was almost done, he took extra care when placing small amounts of medi-gel on her lower lip, his hand remaining still on her lip for a moment longer then she thought he meant to and smiled up at him, placing her hands on his arms.

“Garrus?’  
His eyes snapped up towards her, his mandibles twitching slightly.

“Does it look bad?”  
She stared up at him with concern as he hadn’t spoken much since seeing, and his mandibles flared wide as he gaped at her, shaking his head as he moved his hands and gently cupped her shoulders, pulling her towards him and held her eyes his chest.

“Of course not, nothing could ever look bad on you.”  
Shepard laughed softly as she rested against his chest, closing her eyes a moment before leaning back and stared up at him, smiling brightly.

“Ready to bring hell to Virmier?”  
Garrus laughed and grinned, nodding at her as he gently nuzzled his head against her hair.

“Always ready when you are, Shepard.”  
He closed his eyes and breathed in her sent. She smelt like cinnamon.


	15. Torn Heart

“You are fucking kidding me!”  
Shepard screamed after shutting off the microphone of her comm for a second, shutting her eyes tightly as she crushed her fists into her eyes and screamed in frustration. Garrus looked over at Wrex, and he at him, as they watched their commander scream in frustration.   
Vermier was supposed to be easy, it was supposed to be a simple plan. Get into the facility, plant a bomb to stop the half assed krogan army, leave. Now Shepard had to pick someone to leave behind. She growled, kneeling with her elbows on her knees as she kept her hands crushed against her face.

“Commander, you need to decide! Go back for the Chief!”  
Shepard bit her lower lip as she listened to Kaidan’s voice in her ear.

“Screw you, LT. Commander, go for the Lieutenant!”  
Shepard growled deep in her throat as Ashley spoke, the two now having another verbal argument to why the other one was better. Shepard remained still, her mind and heart torn, hunched over her hands as she takes in a deep breath. 

“Commander.”  
Garrus’s soft voice was the thing to make her finally move, standing tall and rounding her shoulders as she opened her eyes to stare at the far scenery.

“Kaiden. Radio the Normandy to rondeau at your location.”  
There was a silence before Kaiden began speaking.

“Yes, ma’am.”  
Shepard looked over her shoulder at Garrus and Wrex, a large frown on her face as she walked past them towards the elevator to Kaidan’s location.

“I’m sorry, Ashley. I had to make a decision…”  
Shepard hit the button to the elevator as Garrus climbed in behind Wrex.

“Don’t think about it, Commander… It has been an honor, even if you did shove a gun in my face.”  
Shepard smiled bitterly at Ashley’s laughing voice, closing her eyes tightly before stepping out of the elevator. The battle seemed short, too short for the amount of fuss was being made about, Shepard began wondering if she had time to go back for Ashley when her attention was drawn to a new sight. A hover craft appearing from over the edge of the platform and Saren standing atop it. Shepards blood began to boil as she glared at the turian, pulling her gun up and firing on him till her weapon over heated.

Shepard growled as she was forced into cover, glaring down at her gun as she tried to be patient for it to cool down. Saren was babbling about something, but Shepard couldn’t hear him, all she could think about was Nihlus’s body face down in a pool of his own blood. She gripped the pistol tightly and shut her eyes as she took a breath, peeking out slightly to see Saren jump back onto his platform and float off to the distance.   
She growled and stepped out, taking aim at the large explosive canister now underneath Saren. It took a couple hits, but when the canister finally exploded, it went up in flames and knocked out part of Sarens platform with it. Knocking him down to the ground and Shepard charged at him, throwing a biotic warp at him only to miss by an inch, she came up so close and fast that she resorted to punching him square in the jaw as he grabbed her throat. He held her up off the ground and over the edge of the platform, snarling at her. 

His eyes grew wide for a moment as he finally saw her face, the white markings lining her face making his grip falter and she twisted his wrist, causing him to snarl loudly and let go of her. Almost falling off the ledge, Shepard coughed as she gripped her throat and glared up at Saren as alarms started ringing and he retreated to his platform and left the area quickly, staring at Shepard the entire time as he left.   
She watched him leave, glaring as her lip curled in disgust, her attention drawing away as she caught sight of the Normandy coming in for the pick up.

~~~~~~ Normandy, Comm Room~~~~~~~

Shepard stood, staring at the communications console in the debriefing room, her arm folded across her chest as her other hand rested against her lips. Her eyes narrowed in a glare as she recalled Saren’s face, hearing Ashley for the last time, Liara probing her brain again for the second beacon. Her head hurt. It had been three days since Virmier and she was doing her best to be patient on hearing back from the council.

Closing her eyes, she pinched the bridge of her nose and sighed quietly. All she wanted was to fall into bed and sleep for a year. Her head tilted to the side as she heard foot steps coming up from behind her. Her brow arched high as she watched Kaidan and Liara coming up to her, her arms folding behind her back.

“Commander. Liara. I think we need to talk.”  
Shepard’s brow lifted high as she tilted her head.

“Talk?”  
Liara nodded.

“Yes, I think that is best.”  
Shepard tilted her head the other way, her brow knitting together.

“What are we talking about?”  
Kaidan and Liara stared at one another, then back at Shepard.

“You know very well what we need to talk about, Shepard.”  
Her brow knit together even more as she stared at Liara, her lips pressing into a frown.

“Obviously I don’t… Someone care to fill me into this little drama, so I can play what ever part we think I should be playing?”  
Kaidan rolled his eyes as he folded his arms across his chest.

“You now very well that we need to talk about us, and you and Liara.”  
Shepard opened her mouth to talk but then closed it, her brow lifting high as she stared at the two of them incomplete bewilderment.

“I’m sorry… “us”? When was there an “us”?”   
This time it was Liara’s turn to roll her eyes at Shepard.

“I told you my feelings for you, Shepard, and you have been going back and flirting with Kaidan after.”  
Shepard opened her mouth to speak again then stopped as she lifted a hand to pinch her brow, recalling the time she went to check on Liara in the med bay. She really did not think that that was what Liara had meant when she said she liked Shepard. 

“You need to make a choice, Shepard. This is getting ridiculous.”  
Shepard growled quietly to herself before sighing. When she looked up, she saw Garrus walking past the door and it was like a light bulb clicked on and she smirked slightly.

“I am going to tell you both something, right now. So, listen carefully.”  
The both of them stood staring at Shepard, Kaidan with his arms folded over his chest and Liara with her hands folded behind her back.

“Garrus!”  
Shepard called his name loud enough to be heard past the closing door, the turian leaning back in his stride and opened the motion censored door, his brow plates lifted.

“Come here, please.”  
The turian took a step back and walked into the room, Kaidan and Liara both looking at him confused as he strode up to Shepard and stayed close to her.

“What can I do for you, Commander?”  
Shepard smiled up at Garrus and took his arm in both her hands, making him lean down so she could whisper to him, but to Liara and Kaidan, it looked as if she was kissing his cheek.

“Please play along…”  
His brow plates listed at her words as she let his stand straight, her hands moving as she now hugged Garrus’s arm to her.

“I don’t know what you both thought, I was simply trying to be polite when speaking with you both. I find you both very charming, but when you said you liked me, I had no idea this is what you meant.”  
The both stared at Shepard, brows knitted together as they watched Shepard hang off of Garrus’s arm.

“But Shepard, you…”  
Shepard shook her head and closed her eyes.

“I understand a turian’s way of showing affection more then I do human, or asari. I apologize if I have lead you both astray, but the matter of fact is, I actually have a date with Garrus, you see.”  
Everyone sputtered and Shepard nudged Garrus gently to cover his, smiling up at him as she rested her head against his shoulder.

“We have had it planned for a while now that we would have dinner in my cabin, undisturbed. Now, if you will excuse us…”  
Shepard pulled Garrus along and he followed, rubbing the back of his neck as he looked back at a very confused and slightly angry Liara and Kaidan, shaking his head slightly. He followed Shepards lead all the way to her cabin, shutting the door firmly behind them and she sank to the floor with a loud groan.

“Do I get to know what all of that was about?”  
Shepard laughed softly and looked up at Garrus, Caneo jumping off from her bed and running over to her.

“I apparently made them think I had feelings for them, which I don’t.”  
Garrus hummed quietly and chuckled, shaking his head.

“They think as soon as a pretty person smiles at them, they get all hot and bothered for them.”  
Garrus’s brow plate lifted.

“Hot and bothered?”  
Shepard paused and looked up at Garrus, smiling lightly and chuckled as she pet the top of Caneo’s head.

“Right, that must have sounded weird… What I mean is… That as son as someone smiles at them, they think that that person wants to jump into bed with them. You know, for sex.”  
Garrus coughed at the statement before laughing, rubbing his hand across his face.

“They do seem fairly desperate in the romance area, don’t they?”  
Shepard nodded, laughing as she stood up and walked over to the bed, sitting down heavily on it. Garrus watched her, his head tilting to the side as his eyes dropped and stared at the floor.

“Tell me, is it true you understand turian affection better then other species?”  
Shepard looked up at Garrus, a small smile growing on her lips as she could hear his quiet humming from where she sat.

“That is true. I happen to like turians the best, in all aspects.”  
She smiled and tapped the white paint that lined her jaw, giggling as Garrus’s mandibles flared as if he had suddenly forgotten she had them.

“What is on your mind, Garrus?”  
Garrus sighed and walked over to the bed, sitting down next to Shepard as he stared down at his hands.

“I don’t know… It’s just… Odd. When I am around you, I feel at peace, like I don’t need to be any where else.”  
Shepard smiled up at him, chuckling softly as she closed her eyes and leaned against Garrus’s shoulder, resting her hand on top of his.

“I know… I feel the same.”  
Garus looked down at her words, his brow plates lifting as he turned his hand around and laced his three fingers between hers, amazed that they could hold hands fairly normally. Garrus lifted his eyes from their hands and watched Shepard, her breathing had evened out and she now rested heavily on him. He laughed softly, gently nuzzling the top of her head as he breathed in her cent, nestling against her as he closed his eyes. The two of them falling asleep quickly as they leaned against one another.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So... This chapter did annoy me a little bit... I had so many ideas and when I tried writing it, they all came out at once.. So... It came up to a simple "summary". I might come back and fix it.


	16. The Calm

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So.... I haven't been updating as regularly, I know this... Blame the trilogy. I have been replaying it! It's not my fault!!

When Shepard woke, she woke alone and tucked in under the covers of her bed. She looked lazily around her cabin before pulling herself from the sheets, rubbing her face to help wake up as she rolled off the bed. When she exited her cabin, she was greeted with a cup of steaming liquid in her face and her brow knotted together as she looked up to inspect the owner of the hand holding the cup. She smiled sleepily up at Garrus as he took one of her hands and placed the warm mug in it and then proceeded to grab the other hand and place it on the other side of the mug, it made Shepard giggle under her breath.

“I have known you long enough to know that some humans are not morning people, you are one of them. At least not until you have had your coffee.”  
He motioned his head downwards towards the steaming cup, his mandibles flaring slightly.

“I hope it is to your liking.”  
Shepard looked down at the mug and took a cautious sip from it, clicking her tongue against her teeth once before taking another generous gulp and sighs contently.

“So good.”  
Garrus smiled at Shepard as she continued to drink the coffee, wondering if she was still just too tired to tell if it was really any good or if she was just being nice.

“Joker has brought us back to the citadel, apparently the council is finally ready to take action against Saren with the evidence you have gathered.”  
Shepard hummed in thought quietly, the markings on her forehead scrunching slightly as her brow lifted high, her eyes dreamily staring over the brim of her coffee.

“Shepard?”  
She blinked and looked up at Garrus, smiling lightly.

“Sorry. Council, yes. I heard. Just wondering if it will actually do any good this time.”  
She sighed heavily, wiggling her fingers around the mug in her hands. She looked up as she felt something heavy lay on top of her head, smiling as her gaze met Garrus’s neck.

“It is at least worth a try, right?”  
She could feel his jaw move on top of her head, it tickled when his mandibles touched the sides of her head, and she nodded.

“You have a point… Let’s hope we won’t have to go stealing anything to get the point across, yes?”  
Garrus laughed as he lifted his head from hers, his hand resting on her bicep and rubbed his thumb across the sleeve of her uniform before pulling away and pointed to the top of his head.

“You may want to fix your hair before continuing from here, though.”  
Shepard groaned and swatted at Garrus, laughing as she took her mug and ran back into her cabin to fix her bed head.

~~~~~~~~~~Citadel Tower~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Shepard watched as the council stepped away from their podium, her jaw dropped and eyes wide. She quickly looked to see if Udina was still around, but the politician had fled just as fast as the council. Her gaze shifted to Garrus and Wrex as they stood at the base of the stairs, staring back up at her. Wrex wore a deep frown and shook his head while Garrus’s mandibles were flared in surprise. 

“Such… Bull shit!”  
Shepard yelled, her biotics flaring in a weak pulse from her body as she slammed a foot down against the floor. She felt like a child with a temper tantrum, but she needed the release unless she accidently throws a keeper into the nearest wall. 

“Shepard.”  
She looked over at Garrus as he walked up beside her, gritting her teeth.

“This is bull shit, Garrus. They won’t send a fleet, they barely are sending anything, and now Saren will win.”  
She growled and crushed her fists against her eyes, mumbling more under her breath and Garrus placed his hand on her shoulder.

“We’ll figure it out, Shepard.”  
She sighed and removed her hands from her eyes, looking up at him and smiled lightly. He smiled back, placing his arm over her shoulders and walked down the steps with her as they made the long trip back to the Normandy. Shepard was not impressed with the council, everyone knew it when she got back, cursing loudly and throwing things across the haul. Wrex could almost swore she had the temper of a krogan. When she finally settled down, she had landed in a lump of flesh in front of her locker.

“Commander?”  
She lifted her head and stared up at Kaidan, her brow lifting as she rubbed a hand across her forehead.

“Lieutenant… What can I do for you?”  
She rubbed her face and placed her hands on her knees, staring up at Kaidan.

“I just… Want to make sure you are alright. Everyone heard what happened with the council. I can’t imagine you being to be impressed with all that has been going on.”  
Shepard sighed loudly and rested the back of her head against the locker, closing her eyes.

“No, I’m not. This is the second-time politics will have screwed me.”  
Kaidan’s brow furrowed and he rubbed his arm nervously.

“Shepard, listen.”  
Shepard lifted her head as Kiadan spoke, her brow lifting at the informality.

“I know how you feel about the politicians, and humans for that matter, but I care about you. A lot. Seeing you like this isn’t easy for me. Just… Tell me what I can do to help you feel better.”  
Shepard closed her eyes and smiled slightly, lifting herself up from the floor and placed her hand on Kaidans arm.

“I know, Kaidan. I am flattered, really.”  
He laughed quietly and looked at Shepard.

“But?”  
She smiled apologetically at him, taking her hand back as she placed her finger tips against her jaw line and traced one of the white marks.

“I gave up on a lot of things, a long time ago. I found a place where I belonged only to have it ripped away from me. I feel like… I may have a new hope for me.”  
As she spoke, Garrus stepped out from the elevators, her emerald gaze holding to him as her jaw tensed.

“I’m sorry, Kaidan, but my new hope isn’t with you.”  
She stared at him apologetically before brushing past him, his face turning from hope to complete dismay as he stared at the floor with wide eyes and a tense jaw. Shepard ran up to Garrus, tapping his arm and smiling up at him as he greeted her. Kaidan looked over at Shepard once more to see Garrus lean down and gently nuzzle the side of his head against the top of Shepards head, his chest tightening as he watched how much Shepard was beaming with smiles at the gesture. 

“Commander?”  
The three of them looked up at the ceiling as if they were going to see the disembodied voice.

“Joker? What’s up?”  
Kaidan looked back at Shepard, her eyes still staring at the air.

“Admiral Anderson send word. He wishes to speak with you. He will be at Flux. He sounded rather urgent.”  
Shepard looked at Garrus and motioned her head sideways, smiling up at him and he nodded. The two of them taking their leave of the mess, leaving Kaidan to his thoughts as he stared after Shepard.

~~~~~~~~~1 hour later~~~~~~~~~~~

Holy shit, holy shit, holy shit. 

Shepard leaned up against the bars over looking the star map, her mouth open and hands clasped around her lips. They just stole the Normandy. STOLE IT! Shepard met with Anderson and he had this stupid plan to get the Normandy out of lock down, certain it was not going to work, Shepard just rolled with it. Telling Anderson to break into Udina’s office to release the lock down. When the light turned green, she panicked, ordering the Normandy to leave and follow after Saren. 

She stared at the galaxy map, her emerald eyes still wide as she stared at the relay selected to take them to Ilos. Her mind swam with consequences for Anderson, her heart hurting for him as she started wondering if he would be locked up for this. A gentle bump on her leg made her look down, her lips finally curving into a small smile as she knelt down and wrapped her arms around Caneo’s neck and hugged him. She stayed like that for a while before notifying Joker she would be in her cabin and to let her know when they were getting close, her mind swimming with possibilities of how Ilos will play out.  
She stared at the walls of her cabin, lazily playing with the necklace around her neck as she did. The door of her cabin opening taring her from her thoughts and her brow lifted as she stared at Garrus.

“Garrus, what can I do for you?”  
The tall turian stared down at Shepard for a moment, his mandibles twitching as he hummed quietly in his subvocals, shifting uncomfortably.

“Shepard, I…”  
Her head tilted as his voice dropped out, staring up at him. They remained silent for a while before Shepard finally smiled and reached out to him, taking his hands in hers and lead him over to the bed and sat him down. She climbed in beside him, resting her head on his shoulder and he wrapped his arm around her waist, holding her close to him as she threw her legs over top of his. They didn’t say anything, they didn’t need to. Garrus’s soft purring telling Shepard everything she needed to hear.

“Commander? We’re five minutes out.”  
Shepard opened her eyes, glancing at the chest of the turian she was snuggled up against as he stirred at Jokers voice. She sat up, staring at Garrus as he stared down at her and smiled. She reached up and traced her hand across his mandible, making him purr once again as he leaned into her touch, and she smiled more. She sat up more and cupped his cheeks, tilting his head down and pressed her forehead to his, humming a soft note to him before letting go and climbing off from his lap.

“Ready to catch a rogue spectre?”  
He grinned as he stood and walked next to her, helping her pull her fiery hair from her face and into a tight bun.

“Ready when you are, Elizabeth.”


	17. Tradition

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So... In the interest that it's Christmas soon.... here is a small interlude before ME2 story starts.

“Sheparrrd!”  
She rolled her closed eyes and snuggled closer into her pillow. She was hearing things.

“Sheparrrrrrrrrrd!”  
Her eyes opened a small bit. Was that getting closer?

“SHEPARRRRRRRRD!!”  
Yup, that was definitely closer.

“SHEPARD!”  
She yipped loudly as her bed suddenly bowed under the weight of something large, making her roll from one side of her body onto the other, her face meeting that of the culprit. Wrex was beaming down at her, his large toothy grin almost making her not want to punch him. Almost.

“Wrex…”  
She sat up and checked the wrapping on her arm. Medi-gel helped with most of the healing, but she still needed to keep it bound. She stared at Wrex as he got up from leaning on her bed, his mass replaced by Caneo as the varren pounced happily onto the matress and did a spin.

“Damn good fight, Shepard! Saren was one tough son of a bitch! You always take me to the best places!”  
Shepard rolled her eyes and grinned, shaking her head as she pulled her legs to her chest and lend on her knees, resting her cheek on her hand. Saren’s name made her cringe, his plan of bringing the reapers to wipe out all life making her feel nauseous. The fact they managed to stop him not that long ago made Shepard feel like she needed a nice long vacation from life, maybe sleep for a year, or two.

“Next time you get the cracked ribs and broken arm though.”  
Wrex bellowed in laughter.

“I hear you earned some shore leave too. Planning anywhere nice?”  
Shepard tilted her head to the side slightly, staring off to the side before clicking her tongue and shook her head.

“None that I can think of. Maybe visit earth?”  
Wrex stared at Shepard, his brow lifting as he watched her climb out of bed. She wore a tank top and short shorts, claims it is more comfortable to sleep in then pants. Pulling her hair over her shoulder, she sat down in her chair and grabbed a brush before looking back at Wrex.

“It’s December. Maybe I’ll go some where snowy.”  
Wrex’s brow lifted even more as he stared at Shepard.

“Don’t you not trust other humans? Why earth?”  
Shepard laughed softly, shaking her head and smiled as she started to brush out her hair.

“I like the snow; besides, Earth has the best views.”  
Wrex scoffed and made Shepard chuckle as she pulled her hair back and tied it up in the usual bun, her gaze lifting to the doors of her cabin as they opened. A smile crossing her face as Garrus walked in with a steaming mug.

“Shepard, thought you’d be up.”  
He nodded to Wrex as he entered the room and placed the mug down in front of Shepard, pausing to take in what she was wearing, and his mandibles flared.

“Thank you, Garrus. Do me a favor?”  
Garrus’s eyes snapped back up to Shepard’s face and she smiled more.

“Stop staring and go tell joker to take us to earth, please.”  
Garrus opened his mouth to speak as he looked over at Wrex, but the krogan shrugged and shook his head. Garrus nodded once before looking back at Shepard.

“Will do.”

“Thank you.”  
Shepard leaned back in her chair as she watched Garrus leave, her eyes lingering on his back and trailing over his body. When the door of her cabin closed, she glanced at Wrex as he began to laugh.

“What’s so funny?”  
Wrex laughed more, shaking his head.

“I don’t know about you, kid, but I am not the only one who see’s you are undressing the turian with your eyes.”  
Shepard choked on her sip of coffee, staring wide eyed at Wrex as her cheeks turned a bright red blush.

“I am not!”  
Wrex only smirked at Shepard and shook his head, heading towards the door of her cabin and waved his hands at her.

“Sure, you’re not, kid.”  
Shepard grumbled and placed the mug’s rim on her lips, glaring at Wrex as he left, her cheeks still bright red.

~~~~~~~~~~~~Earth Port~ Ottawa~~~~~~~~~~~

Shepard grinned as she watched the crew run out of the air lock, leaning against the wall as she observed quiet a few winter coats being tossed over top of alliance uniforms. Perhaps this was a good idea after all. Her eyes skimmed over the heads leaving and she pushed off the wall, pushing past people.

“Tali. You coming?”  
The quarrian rung her fingers together and watched as people walked past, a quiet uncertain groan leaving her.

“I don’t know Shepard.”  
Shepard grinned and shook her head, grabbing Tali by the arm and pulling her along. When they reached the cock pit, Shepard let go of her arm and grabbed something out of a fairly large box and spun around throwing it over Tali’s shoulders.

“You’ll be fine.”  
Tali took a moment to register what just happened, watching as Shepard heled her put her arms threw the sleeves of the jacket she was now wearing. 

“You know I don’t need this, Shepard.”  
Shepard rolled her eyes and smiled at Tali, patting her shoulder.

“Come on, I saw it on the extranet and couldn’t resist. Besides, the colour matches your suit.”  
Tali looked down again, giggling lightly as she ran her three fingers over the fur rim of the coat, the colour matching almost perfect to her suit.

“Thank you, Shepard. Perhaps… Looking around will not be so bad.”  
Shepard laughed and motioned towards the air lock.

“That’s the spirit. Go explore. We are docked for 3 days, have fun. Maybe you will learn new things for your Pilgrimage, you know, besides the geth data.”  
Tali rolled her eyes and waved at Shepard as she left, the commander leaning against the wall again till she saw Wrex and Garrus walking towards her. She laughed seeing them in full armor, shaking her head at them and stopped Wrex long enough to stuff a scarf around his neck and partially in his armor, before letting him leave.

“Hold on you.”  
Shepard grabbed Garrus’s arm as he tried leaving, smiling up at him.

“I know turians don’t do well in the cold, so…”  
Garrus’s brow plate lifted as he watched Shepard lean over and pick up a box, shoving it into his hands.

“No armor today, Garrus. You get to walk around with me.”  
Garrus laughed, grinning at Shepard.

“Since when did shore leave involve you giving orders still?”  
Shepard rolled her eyes at him and shook her head.

“Just go and change. I will meet you back here when you are done.”  
Garrus rolled his eyes, almost scared of what was in the box, as he left to change. When he opened the box, it contained the normal casual wear of a turian, but the fabric was thicker and denser. When he put it on, he felt warmer then when he had his armor on and almost purred at the sensation of the warm fabric on the back of his neck. He checked the gloves as he walked back to the air lock, flexing his fingers in the soft fabric, and his step faltered when he looked up to see if Shepard was there. His mandibles flared as his jaw dropped, it seemed Shepard had gone to change as well.

She changed into a pair of jeans with boots that ended just below her knee, the rim of them covered in fur. Her jacket looked poofy, the rims of it also covered with fur and Garrus assumed humans didn’t handle the cold either with how much padding he saw in some vids. Her fiery hair was set free, the long strands seemed like they were everywhere as parts hung over her chest, other strands seemed to hide in the hood of the jacket she wore. She looked up and smiled at him, waving him over and he obliged.

“Here.”  
She walked around behind him and pushed his arms threw the holes of another set of sleeves, jumping onto her tippy toes to push the jacket over his shoulders and smiled as she walked back around to the front and straightened it. 

“I know the uniform is warm, but, this will make it better.”  
Garrus looked down and watched Shepard do up the front of the royal blue jacket, chuckling softly as he looked back at her.

“What?”  
She peeked up at him, her brow furrowing.

“You did all this for the crew?”  
Shepard rolled her eyes and took a step back, watching as Garrus flexed in the jacket to get comfortable.

“Some already knew what to expect, I only helped out the ones who don’t.”  
Garrus watched as Shepard began to walk out the airlock, quickly falling into step beside her as he watched her. When the other side of the air lock opened, Garrus gasped at the cold air hitting his face and closed his eyes, he was definitely thankful for the extra layer. Shepard smiled up at him and took his arm into hers and held onto it, moving him forward a step as he opened his eyes. His mandibles flared as he stared in awe at the snow-covered city, his eyes falling to kids picking it up and throwing it at one another.

“Welcome to Ottawa, Garrus.”  
He looked down at Shepard as she spoke and smiled, walking forwards again, with Shepard hugging his arm.

~~~~~~

They walked for hours, Garrus asking about some things set up along the road and the trees in windows of people’s homes. Shepard laughed at how many questions he asked, shaking her head as she answered them all for him. 

“Are you cold?”  
She peeked up at him, her head tilting.

“Just a little.”  
She smiled and stopped walking, sitting him down on a bench and told him to wait, before running off. Garrus watched as she vanished into the crowd of people, his gaze turning to the large field of snow behind him and he watched as people of all ages pushed snow together to make large balls and staked them, making what appeared to be a human like shape and drawing faces on them. He will have to ask Shepard when she got back. 

“Garrus.”  
He looked back and smiled as he saw Shepard with two cups in her hands, one extended to him which he took quickly. He looked up at Shepard and his brow plates lifted as he noticed her nose and cheeks had turned red from the cold and chuckled softly.

“Do all humans look like that when they are cold?”  
Shepard made a noise and lifted her brow as she looked at Garrus as he tapped her nose, smiling at him as she rolled her eyes.

“Yes, actually. It get’s that way if we are too hot too… Or upside down for too long.”  
She started laughing at the expression Garrus made at her last words, shaking her head as she took a sip of her cup.

“Drink. You’ll warm up.”  
Garrus did as instructed and took a sip, his mandibles flaring.

“This is chocolate?”  
Shepard nodded some, taking another sip from her cup.

“It’s hot chocolate. Melted chocolate mixed with some milk. I promise it’s dextro.”  
Garrus lifted a brow as he watched Shepard hold her hand out to him and he took it, chuckling as he stood up.

“You always think of everything, don’t you?”  
Shepard wiggled her head side to side, smiling.

“Almost.”  
They both laughed before Garrus pointed to the field and the people making the piles of snow.

“What are those?”  
Shepard looked towards where he was pointing and smiled.

“Their called snowmen.”  
Garrus’s mandibles flared as he nodded, watching as some people put scarfs around them, and chuckled. The rest of the time they were walking around, Garrus kept his eyes on Shepard as she stopped to look in the windows of shops and pulled him inside some of them. The sun had set and is got colder, but he didn’t mind as Shepard hugged closer to him and kept him plenty warm when they finished their cups of hot chocolate. Garrus stared at the lights turning on, some were tinted red or green, and looked at Shepard as she explained that the month had a special day where people would spend time with family and friends, giving gifts and cooking dinners that were big enough to feed five krogan, he laughed at the last part.

“Oh. Speaking of.”  
She let go of his arm and reached into the front pocket on her jacket, pulling out a long slender box.

“Here.”  
She smiled as Garrus took the box and opened it, his mandibles flaring as he removed the top to reveal a new head set.

“I remember you complaining once before that your current one is glitching. So…”  
Garrus looked from the visor to Shepard, smiling at her as she looked away nervously and scratched her cheek. He dipped down and nuzzled the side of her head with his and hummed quietly.

“Thank you, Shepard.”  
She smiled up at him and wrapped her arms around him, hugging him close and he returned it, gently nuzzling her hair.

“Uh, Shepard. What is…?”  
She looked up and around to see a lot of people were giving kisses to one another, her eyes widening slightly as she looked directly over head and grumbled, Garrus’s gaze following hers.

“It’s called mistletoe… It’s an old human tradition… when ever a pair of people are under it, their supposed to kiss.”  
Garrus watched as Shepard fidgeted nervously as she spoke, a small grin on his face seeing her like this, and he wrapped his arm around her shoulders.

“Well then, if it’s tradition…”  
Shepard looked up at him just in time to have the turians hard lips lay gently on top of hers. Her eyes growing wide as she stared at Garrus for a moment, her arms unsteadily reaching up and wrapping around his shoulders as he pulled her in closer and purred quietly against her lips and her eyes closed. They stayed like that for a what felt like an eternity before pulling back, Shepard’s cheek a deep red blush as she stared up at Garrus as he smiled down at her.

“Merry Christmas, Elizabeth.”


	18. Destroyed

Shepard grinned at Kaidan as he sat across from her, her eyes glancing down at the table as she playfully tapped her finger against the surface.

“Your move, Lieutenant.”  
Kaidan grumbled under his breath and rubbed his brow.

“Don’t rush me, Ma’am.”  
Shepard laughed and looked up as a heavy hand landed on her shoulder, a smiling up at Garrus as he loomed over the table next to her.

“Call.”  
Shepard looked over at Kaidan as he spoke, grinning more as she looked at the cards in front of her.

“Sorry, Lieutenant. Full triple aces.”  
Kaidan groaned loudly, throwing his hands up in the air as Shepard started laughing. 

“I told you not to play poker with me, Kaidan.”  
He rubbed his face and sighed, shaking his head.

“That you did, ma’am, that you did.”  
Shepard stood from the table and waved to Kaidan before walking away with Garrus. After the visit to earth, they had become closer then Garrus had thought they would. Her funny human ways, her appearance, he found himself wanting to know more and to be closer to her every moment he spent in her company. Shepard paused for a moment, her head tilting up as Garrus had leaned down and gently nuzzled the side of her head and she giggled at him. She opened her mouth to speak, but the moment she looked Garrus in the eye, the Normandy thrashed as loud explosions sounded. 

Garrus caught Shepard as she stumbled forwards into him, his eyes wide as he looked around the mess before looking back down at Shepard, the look in her eyes telling him to let go and they both ran in separate directions. She to get her armor and he to see what was going on. It was a moment longer then he liked away from Shepard as he ran threw burning hauls and dodged sudden explosions.

“Shepard!”  
He found her near the back of the mess, trying to get the distress beacon to launch.

“Distress beacon ready for launch.”  
She turned to look at him, he could see the frustration in her eyes behind her mask as an explosion knocked the console out.

“Will the alliance make it in time?”  
He helped to steady her as she grabbed an extinguisher, tossing it to him as he let her go and went about putting out some fires on the far side o the room as she pulled at wires and tried to get the console working again.

“They damn well better. Else they will have me kicking their asses.”  
Garrus laughed quietly under his breath.

“Joker is still in the cockpit, I’m not leaving either.”  
Shepard pulled a final wire and connected it to another and the console came back up, stumbling her way back to the console.

“I need you to help get the crew to the evac shuttles. I’ll handle Joker.”  
Garrus winced at another explosion and started after Shepard as she slammed her fist down on the console to launch the beacon.

“Elizabeth…”  
She hung her head a moment before turning around and looking at Garrus, her lips pressing together under her helm.

“Please, Garrus. Go.”  
He stood stead for a moment before nodding.

“I better see you at the end of this.”  
Shepard nodded, dipping her head as Garrus turned heel and ran to help the crew get out. She looked back once at the console to make sure the beacon launched before running across the mess and up the steps, gasping as her gravity boots kicked in when the door to the deck opened. She stared at the field keeping the Normandy together, groaning as she stomped her way across the deck. When she reached the cockpit, she grabbed Jokers hat and shoved it down on his head.

“What the hell is wrong with you?! We need to leave! NOW!”  
Joker hissed and flipped his hat back up as he clicked away at the controls.

“I’m not abandoning the Normandy! I can still save her!”  
Shepard grumbled and grabbed Jokers arm, making him look at her.

“The Normandy is lost, you think going down with the ship will change that?!”  
Joker stared at Shepard for a moment before sighing heavily and closed his eyes.

“Yes… Ok… Help me up.”  
She reached further down his arm, hoisting him up as he looked at the console.

“Oh no… Their coming around for another attack!”  
Shepard looked over her shoulder to see a large beam cut through the field keeping the Normandy together and cursed under her breath.

“Ow! Watch the arm!”  
She hoisted Joker up as fast as she could, she’d apologize later if she broke something, and hauled him towards the escape pod. She sat him down and looked back at the space where she could see the assailing ship, her lips thinning out as she moved to try and climb in to the pod but was knocked back by an explosion as the beam hit again.

“Commander!”  
Shepard yelled as the Normandy’s field ripped and what little artificial gravity that was there was gone, her fingers clinging to the launch pad. She looked up to see Joker reaching for her and she shut her eyes tightly, her fingers slipped but she managed to launch the pod. 

“Shepard!”  
Joker called her name before the door sealed and the pod launched, the Normandy’s haul ripping in two and Shepard’s body got thrown into the far side. She was sent spinning and growled as she tried to level herself out, staring at the remains of the Normandy as she was in free float. Her eyes caught sight of the engines of the escape pods, smiling to herself knowing that most of them were safe. She stared after them for a while longer till she could feel her throat closing around itself, only now noticing a loud hissing sound coming from her suit.

“No… no, no, no, no.”  
She grabbed her throat and reached back to the tube leading from her O2 tank to her helmet, she could feel a tare. Her heart sank, trying to breath as her hand tightened on her throat and clawed at it as her body began to flail as she tried to breath. Her eyes shutting tightly.  
‘I’m sorry, Garrus.’  
She suddenly felt hot, too hot, letting out a scream of frustration before her mind went blank.


	19. Dead Dreams

Shepard gasped awake, her emerald eyes wide as she looked around. Her room? She looked down in her lap, her body covered in sheets form her bed. Her head tilted as she traced a hand across her throat, shutting her eyes as she swallowed hard.

“Bad dreams?”  
Her eyes snapped open, looking beside her and her eyes grew wide.  
coffee coloured eyes stared up at her from the pillows, and deep brown curls framed his face as he stared sleeply up at her.

“Want to talk about it?”  
She shook her head slightly, staring down at Kurtis as she reached up and traced his hand across her cheek and smiled before turning back into his pillow.

“It’s almost time to start getting ready… It’s your turn to wake up Jessy.”  
Shepard’s brow furrowed as she looked at the clock on her side of the bed and pulled the sheets from her body, swinging her feet out from the bed as she rubbed her face roughly. She stood from the bed and looked around cautiously before leaving the bedroom and looked won the hall way.

It was definitely her apartment on the citadel. The deep burgundy walls that lined the hall way made everything seem so much darker as she began walking, her steps halting after half a meter and she stared at the door with decorative letters spelling “Jessica.” Stealing herself she knocked once on the door before opening it and flicking on the lights, the pink room almost blinding Shepard as he light up like a Christmas tree. 

A groan and movement from the bed across from her made Shepard take a deep breath as she walked over and pulled the sheets away, and her breath caught in her throat. The little girl was no more then four years old, curly deep red strands of hair tossled about her pillows as her light brown eyes blinked rapidly and stared up at Shepard.

“Mommy… Liiiight.”  
Shepard smiled as she instinctually reached out and brushed the girls hair to the side before helping her sit up.

“Time to wake up, Jessy.”  
The little girl mumbled something inaudible as she rubbed her eyes and Shepard smiled a little more. She watched the girl kick her blankets away, glaring at them as they clung to her feet before swinging her legs off and stopping to yawn loudly at the edge of the bed. Shepard chewed her lower lip, she still had no idea what was going on, but it warmed her heart to watch it. Jessy was the daughter of her and Kurtis, how she had no idea, but it was there, in front of her. 

“How are my favorite girls?”  
Shepard closed her eyes and smiled as she felt a kiss on her cheek as she watched Jessy get dressed, looking to the side and stopped as she let out a shriek. Kurtis was covered in blood, his eyes missing, as blood spilled from his mouth when he spoke. She looked back to where Jessy was supposed to be but there was only darkness, a pitch black void where the room was supposed to be. Shepard shrieked again as Kurtis wrapped his hands around Shepard throat, staring down into her even though he had no eyes.

~~~~~~~~~~~

“Something’s happening…”  
Shepards eyes pealed open partially.

“She’s responding to outside stimuli.”  
Her heart began to race at the new voice she didn’t recognize, pain shooting through her body.

“Damnit, she’s not ready! Give her a sedative!”  
Shepard looked over at the other voice, her breath becoming rapid.

“Brain activity is off the charts…!”  
Shepard squeezed her eyes shut and opened them again when something grabbed her hand and she stared at the raven haired women.

“Commander, try to remain still and clam.”  
Shepard kept her eyes on the women, her heart feeling like it was about to burst.

“Give her another dose, now!”  
Finally, Shepard felt the pain easing away, closing her eyes as her breathing calmed, her view of the women fading before her mind went blank again.

~~~~~~~~~~~

When Shepard woke again, this time she knew it was wrong. She shouldn’t be here, it wasn’t right, it felt empty. Her eyes opened wide as she stared around the living room of her apartment, her brow knitting together as she looked down at the weight in her lap. A loud gasp leaving her lips as she stared down at Nihlus. The large turian took to having a nap in her lap, his head cuddled in against what Shepard finally registered to be her very large and swollen stomach.   
She shut her eyes tightly and cupped a hand over her mouth, her breath hitching as she opened her eyes again and stared down at her stomach, her other hand absentmindedly laying on top of it as she traced small circles. The thumping in her stomach making her think it was all the more real… But it was still not. The thought made her choke out a sob and Nihlus stirred in her lap and stare up at her, his mandibles flaring as he saw her crying.

“Shepard? What’s wrong? Are you alright?”  
He cupped her face in his hands as he sat up in no time, checking her over as she shook her head and placed her hands on top of his.

“No… I’m… I’m ok.”  
Nihlus let out a sigh of relief as he placed his forehead against hers, purring quietly as he closed his eyes.

“I will never under stand the emotional hormones of a pregnant women.”  
Shepard choked out a laugh as she watched Nihlus move away and stand, moving ot the kitchen.

“Do you need anything? A drink maybe?”  
Shepard shook her head, leaning on the back of the couch as she watched Nihlus walk into the kitchen, his subvocals chirping happily as he looked back at Shepard and smiled. She smiled back at him before looking down at her belly as it thumbed inside, her brow lifting as she felt butterflies in her stomach from the baby spinning within her. She cursed silently as she placed a hand over her stomach, shutting her eyes tightly and pressed her lips together as she tried to remember why it all felt so wrong. 

“Elizabeth?”  
Her eyes shot open at the sound of her voice, she never recalled when Nihlus said her name in such a way, and her eyes grew wide as Nihlus was no where in sight. Instead, a tall turian with blue clan markings and icey blue eyes stared down at her.

“Where were you, Elizabeth?”  
His voice was hurt, broken. And Shepard stood up on her knees, her belly no longer large with child and she reached out to Garrus.

“Garrus! I tried! I needed to save Joker! I…”  
Garrus held up his hands before taking hers into his, cupping her hands close to his chest as he leaned forwards and nuzzled the side of his head against hers.

“I know… You needed to help a friend, your family is your crew… But Elizabeth…”  
He pulled back, tracing his fingers through her hair, his face now covered in blue blood as it dripped down the sides of his mandibles.

“You need to wake up, you need to safe them again. Prove you are stronger, show them.”  
Her eyes grew wide as she reached out and cupped the sides of Garrus’s face, pulling him to her and pressed her forehead against his, keeping him there as he reached up and gripped her hips.

“Wake up, Shepard.”  
Her eyes snapped open as she looked at Garrus, a women’s voice coming from his lips.

“You need to wake up! Shepard, WAKE UP!”

~~~~~~~~~~~~

Shepard’s eyes snapped open, her jaw clenching hard before she opened it, needing to use her hand to help it move as she sat up, her eyes scanning the very white room. It looked like an operating room. 

“Shepard! Your scars aren’t healed yet, but you need to move, this facility is under attack! There is a pistol and armor in the locker across the room, you need to grab it.”  
Shepard hissed as she climbed off the table, slumping to her knees as pain radiated from every inch. Stealing herself, she stood up again and walked to the locker and flung it open. Her eyes grew wide as she saw her reflection in the mirror on the inside of the locker door, her facial scars were gone but in their place the one side of her jaw was now lined with thin lines of glowing cybernetics, as well as the upper edge of her forehead. Shepard roared and slammed her fist into the mirror, gritting her teeth as she stared at the clan markings that decorated her face still. 

“Shepard… We don’t have time for this, grab your pistol and armor!”  
Shepard looked up hearing the voice, catching sight of a security camera and flipped it off.

“Charming.”  
Shepard smirked when she heard the unamused tone in the voice and turned to put on her armor. Pulling the ruby strands of her hair up and tied it around itself, finding a tie, she quickly fastened it and resumed to put on her gear.

“I appreciate you helping me, magical creepy person who is spying on me… But once I get off this station, I want some god damn fucking answers!”  
There was a long silence and Shepard grumbled.

“Or I can just stand here and hope something kills me. Again.”  
Shepard waited a moment longer before the voice spoke again.

“As you wish, Commander.”


	20. Two years Gone

Shepard rubbed her brow with her middle finger as she sat across from Jacob and Miranda, her eyes shut as she listened to them bicker at one another.

“Before we meet the Illusive man, we need to ask a few questions to evaluate your condition.”  
Shepard opened her eyes and looked at Miranda, she already didn’t like her, saving her life or not.

“More tests? Come on Miranda. Shepard just took down those mechs without any trouble. That has to be good enough.”  
Shepards gaze shifted over to Jacob as he spoke, eyeing up the darker skinned man as she tried to decide if she liked him enough to stop flipping them off soon as she continued to trace her middle finger across her forehead.

“It’s been two years since the attack. The Illusive name needs to know that Shepard’s personality and memories are still intact. Ask the questions.”  
Shepard froze, her eyes snapping up to Miranda.

“Two years?!”  
Miranda and Jacob looked over at Shepard and her out burst and Miranda simply nodded at her.

“I’m sorry… You need to say it again, Miranada.”  
The women sighed dramatically, shaking her head, Jacob answering for her.

“Commander Shepard, you died in space when an unknown assailant attacked the Normandy. Two years and twelve days, you have been on an operating table for most of it.”  
Shepard sunk back in her seat, her arms folding across her chest as she looked out the window, watching the stars fly by. Miranda sighed again, looking at Jacob.

“The sooner we start, the sooner we can be done. Start with personal history.”  
Jacob rolled his eyes and looked down at his omni tool quickly before speaking again.

“Record shows you were a colony kid, lost your parents when the slavers hit Mindoir. You enlisted and survived a Thresher Maw attack that whipped out your entire team. Do you remember that?”  
Shepard’s eyes snapped at Jacob, her emerald gaze glaring at him. She hated both of them now.

“Let me see… Do I remember watching my squad die? Do I remember listening to their bones breaking? Their screams as the acid spit burned them alive? Do I remember watching, as a rock aimed for me, missed and squished what little love I found within humanity? I think I remember. Surviving something like that changes you, it can break you if you let it.”  
Jacob frowned slightly.

“I read the report. 50 people died on Akuze, you were the only one to survive…. Satisfied Miranda?”  
As he spoke her name, Jacob looked towards Miranda and frowned disapprovingly at her. Maybe Shepard didn’t mind him that much if he can give her a look like that.

“Almost.”  
Miranda turned her gaze on Shepard before speaking again.

“Lets try something more recent. Vermire, where you destroyed Sarens cloning facility, you had to leave one of your team behind to die in the blast.”  
Shepard grumbled. She knew where this one was going.

“Gunnery Chief Ashley Williams, was killed in action. It was your call, why’d you leave her behind?”  
Shepard sighed as she readjusted in her seat, brushing loose bangs from her face.

“I left a friend to die that day, and I didn’t do it casually. I had to save as many as I could, Ash gave her life for the rest of the team, without her I would not have been able to stop Saren. She died a hero.”  
Shepard glanced over at Miranda as Jacob spoke again.

“I understand Commander, and I wasn’t judging your decision. Everyone at Cerberus knows that facility had to be destroyed.”  
Shepard rolled her eyes and closed them again, she was tired of the twenty questions game.

“Shepard, think back to the citadel, after the alliance saved the Destiny Assentation and you killed Saren. What happened next?”  
Shepard looked over at Miranda, sitting up right as she stared down at the women.

“Humanity was offered a spot on the council, I recommended Capitan Anderson for the position.”  
Jacob nodded, smirking while Miranda continued speaking.

“That’s right. Capitan Anderson, is now Councillor Anderson. Though from what I hear, he preferred life in the military.”  
Shepard smirked at the last comment, closing her eyes again as she rubbed her forehead again, with her middle finger.

“Still, good to know that the human councillor isn’t going to put politics a head of defence.”  
Shepard shook her head once again as Miranda kept talking.

“Your memory seems solid. There are other tests we really should run…”

“Come on Miranda… The memories are there, and I can vouch for the Commanders military skills personally.”  
Shepard opened her eyes again, looking at Jacob as he spoke and smirked lightly, she might like him.

“I suppose. Have to hope our little field test is evidence enough for the Illusive man.”  
Shepard grumbled under her breath, looking back out the window as she crossed her arms firmly over her chest, this was going to be good.

~~~~~~~~~~

“And people wonder why humanity can’t be trusted…”  
Shepard folded her arms over her chest as she stared at the hollo-gram of the Illusive man, putting most of her weight on one leg as she stared at the older human.

“A necessary precaution, I am sure you understand. Good to see you up and about, Shepard. HOw do you feel?”  
Shepard rolled her eyes and took a step forwards, dropping her arms to her sides.

“Cut the chit chat, we are not friends. You brought me back from the dead, why?”  
Shepard scowled as the Illusive man took a long drag of his cigarette, not answering her as he simply stared at her, analyzing.

“Human colonies are being abducted.”  
Shepard scoffed and leaned back in her step, staring to the side before looking back at him.

“And I care because? Humanity gave up on me, why should I care if a few colonies go missing? And to the point… Why would I work for Cerberus? I remember everything you did to innocent people in my hunt for Saren.”  
There was a long pause, another drag, before he spoke again.

“This isn’t just one ore two colonies, Shepard. Over a dozen colonies have been hit, everyone gone. Every women, man, and child. Just vanished.”  
Shepard’s jaw tensed, staring at the Illusive man as she growled under her breath.

“And you want me to go look into it.”  
He nodded, smirking slightly as he laced his fingers together.

“Fine. You wouldn’t have dragged me here if you didn’t already have somewhere for me to look, and I assume tweedled-dee and tweedled-dumb are my back up.”  
He nodded once again.

“You are very keen Shepard, everything I hoped for.”  
Shepard rolled her eyes and scoffed.

“I’m in charge of this? Will they follow my orders?”  
He shook his head, scowling.

“You need not worry about Miranda or Jacob. They will follow your order with out question.”  
Shepard scoffed once again, placing her hands on her hips.

“Anything else?”  
As soon as he shook his head, Shepard stepped away from the hollo and back up the ramp to the seating area that Miranda, and Jacob were waiting in. Her emerald gaze falling on both as they heard her boot steps, and with a quick head motion towards the shuttle, they all boarded and took off. Shepard stared out the window once again, Miranda and Jacob bickering about something or other on their trip, but all Shepard could think about was the fact she had been gone for two years. She stared at her reflection in the mirror of the shuttle, her eyes tracing over the markings decorating her face. 

“I suppose…”  
She started, Miranda and Jacob stopping their conversation as they looked over at her.

“I should be thankful you decided to rebuild my markings.”  
Her emerald eyes fell on to Miranda, her eyes narrowing.

“For a pro-human group, you seemed to let me keep something not human.”  
Miranda sighed lightly, shaking her head.

“The Illusive man was very specific, he wanted you Shepard. As you were when you fought Saren, when you destroyed the Reaper threatening the Citadel, all of it. If you woke up with out your markings, I am more then certain you would be less cooperative then you are now.”  
Shepard smirked at Miranda’s words, looking back out the window.

“That’s for damn sure…”  
Her eyes flicked down to see planet side coming up fast, making a soft humming sound as she reached for her pistol on the seat next to her.

“I was told everyone in the colonies are taken? But first priority, always, is to look for survivors.”  
The two of them nodded at Shepard as she finished checking her pistol just as the door to the shuttle opened and hopped out, looking over her shoulder to see Miranda and Jacob land on either side of her. 

“Now, let’s get this over with, shall we?”


	21. A Mercenary, A Doctor, And the Archangel

Shepard huffed as she sat in her cabin, her brow pinched together between her index finger and thumb as she went over the events of the past 24 hours.   
Not seconds after coming back from the dead, she was under attack. After that, the so-called leader of Cerberus, the pro human activist group that was kicked out from the government, needed her help to investigate missing colonies. The colony was like a ghost town, it gave her the creeps, but running into Tali was a pleasant turn of the day. 

Shepard opened her eyes and stared down at the data pads sprawled out across her table, picking one up from the group and peered at it. Supposedly these dossiers would help her collect the people she needed to take down their new enemy. The Collectors.   
Shepard sighed heavily and tossed the data pad back onto the table and leaned forwards, resting her elbows against the table and groaned as she crushed the heel of her hands against her eyes, rubbing roughly.

“Commander.”  
Her head tilted slightly, the mechanical voice of the ships new AI echoing through her cabin.

“Yes, EDI?”  
Shepard dropped her hands as she looked over her shoulder, the little blue orb in the corner of her room flickering.

“Mr.Moreau has requested that I inform you: We are ten minutes away from our destination of Omega.”  
Shepard groaned and stood, rubbing the back of her neck and closed her eyes, spinning on her heels and walking across the room.

“Thank you, EDI. Please inform Miranda and Jacob to meet me at the air lock. I want to move quickly.”

“Very well, Commander.”  
Shepard looked out the corner of her eyes as the blue Orb flickered and vanished, sighing as she leaned against the fish tank on the other side of the room. She shut her eyes tightly again, placing a hand on her throat, the feeling of her air way closing causing her to pause and try taking a deep breath. Opening her eyes again, she scowled at the phantom pain and walked towards the elevator and took it down to the main deck, grabbing her gear on the way, and meeting Miranda and Jacob at the air lock. 

“There are three possible recruits from the dossiers here on Omega, Shepard. Which one do you want to go after first?”  
Shepard opened her mouth to speak but then lifted a brow as a salarian came running up to them, he looked jumpy, not right, and Shepard felt her body tense up.

“Welcome to Omega! You’re new here, aren’t you! I can always tell!”  
She took it back, the salarian was just silly and funny to watch. Her eyes flicking to the side as a batarian soon came up behind him and scowled, waving him off and he scurried off in a hurry.

“Blasted scavengers. Welcome to Omega, Shepard.”  
Her brow lifted as she shifted her weight, her hands landing on her hips.

“You know who I am?”  
The batarian scoffed before speaking.

“Of course. We had you tagged the moment you entered the Terminus systems. You’re not as subtle as you think.”  
Shepard rolled her eyes at the batarian, her arms folding across her chest.

“Aria wants to know what a dead spectre is doing on Omega. I suggest you go to Afterlife and present yourself.”  
Shepard pinched her brow between her index finger and thumb, shaking her head.

“Cut the shit… I’m not here to cause problems for Omega.”  
The batarian laughed.

“Things explode around you, Shepard. You can’t blame Aria for keeping an eye on you. Afterlife. Now.”  
Shepard rolled her eyes once again as she watched the batarian turn and leave, looking over her shoulder and smirked at Miranda.

“He was rather charming, wasn’t he?”  
Shepard grinned broadly as Miranda scoffed in disapproval while Jacob smirked.

“You’re no fun.”  
Shepard chuckled as she moved further into the hall, pausing as they reached the end and enjoyed the show of an old merc beating on a batarian. Shepard sent Miranda back to the ship once they arranged for Zaeed to join them then headed to Afterlife. Shepard didn’t like Aria, the Asari had one hell of a god complex that Shepard wanted to be as far away from as possible, but she needed information on the people from the dossiers, so she put up with her for a while longer. 

“Why do I feel like I need a nice scalding shower after talking with her?”  
Zaeed snickered.

“You will need a shower after getting off Omega. This place has so many bugs they’d crawl right under your skin.”  
Shepard shuttered as she paused in front of the recruiting area for going after Archangel, looking at Zaeed.

“Now that is a mental image I could have gone with out. Thank you for that.”  
Shepard shook her head and grinned as she stepped into the make shift office, her brow lifting as there was yet another batarian who eyed her up before speaking.

“Well, aren’t you sweet. You’re in the wrong place, honey. Stripers quarters are that way.”  
Shepard’s brow lifted as she smiled sweetly. A beautiful hue of blue danced across her armor and skin as she reached for her hip and pulled the pistol from its holster, her hand tilting as she examined it, the blue of her biotics still dancing over her body.

“Show me yours, big guy. I bet mines bigger.”  
She winked playfully at him as he pulled the neck piece of his armor and coughed, looking back down at his console.

“Impressive. So, you’re here to fight then.”  
Shepard scoffed and holstered her pistol, folding her arms over her chest.

“Sure, if this is the place to go after Archangel.”  
The batarian nodded, glancing up from his console for a second to look Shepard over.

“This is the place. Standard fee is 500 credits each. You get paid when the job is done. If you die, your friends don’t collect your share.”  
Shepard’s brow lifted high as he spoke as if he had said it a thousand times. Which he probably has, if what her information says about Archangel was true.

“You will need your own weapons and armor… Looks like you’ve got that covered. And no, this does not make you a member of the Blue Suns, Eclipse, or the blood pack. You are a freelancer. Period. Any questions?”  
Shepard laughed silently at his little speech, shaking her head.

“Just tell me where to go.”  
The batarian nodded some, pointing back out the door behind her.

“A shuttle to take the next group will be leaving in two hours. You can find the driver outside in the lot.”  
Shepard spun on her heels quickly, her brow lifting again as the doors opened and a kid not more then twenty years walked past her.

“Hey! This where I sign up?”  
Shepard tilted her head slightly, glancing down at his weapon.

“How old are you? You look a little young to be freelancing as a merc.”  
He spun around angerly.

“I’m old enough! I grew up on Omega. I know how to use a gun.”  
Shepard rolled her eyes as she watched the kid, glancing back at the amused look on the batarians face.

“So does Archangel.”  
She looked over at Jacob as he spoke.

“I can handle myself! Besides, I just spend 50 credits on this pistol, and I wanna use it!”  
Shepard pinched the bridge of her nose between her index finger and thumb as the kid pulled out the crappy pistol and quickly snatched it from his hands, looking it over before slapping the side of it hard enough to make something snap and sizzle before handing it back to the kid.

“Get your money back. Trust me. You’ll thank me later.”  
Shepard patted his shoulder as she stood there pouting over the pistol as she spun around and left, checking her omni-tool.

“Two hours, huh? Think we have time to look for that salarian doctor before heading out?”  
She looked back at Jacob and he checked his omni-tool and the layout of Omega.

“It might be tight, but I think it’s do-able.”  
Shepard laughed, grinning as she tucked loosened strands of her hair behind her ear.

“Come on, Jacob. You’re with Commander Shepard. Everything we do will be “tight.””  
Shepard laughed as Jacob groaned, following behind her as she began a jog out of Afterlife and down into the lower markets. They had a small stall in entering the residential area due to the plague, but Shepard not only pulled the rocket launcher off her back to make her point, but also convinced the guard that she could help the situation. 

Shepard didn’t like batarians, not after what happened to her colony, but leaving the sick batarian as he was just rubbed her the wrong way, so she gave him some medi-gel before going on her way. Shepard folded her arms across her chest as she watched Zaeed ‘round a corner and quickly duck back in, grinning as the old man cursed colourfully as bullets bounced off the wall. He looked up at her, his brow lifting.

“What?”  
She shook her head, closing her eyes and chuckling.

“Nothing, gramps. I just thought you would be more… what’s the word?”  
She tapped her lower lip for a second before looking back at him.

“Physical rather than verbal.”  
Shepard burst out laughing as Jacob choked on his biotics, sending a lift over his shoulder and into containers on the wrong end of the room, and held her sides as Zaeed blushed bright pink and swore even more before ducking back out into the fire and emptying his clip into everything that moved.  
Shepard waited a moment before peeking her head out when the firing stopped, smirking as she peeled herself from the wall and skipped over to Zaeed and leaned on his shoulder.

“Nice shootin’, rex.”  
She smirked at him and patted his shoulder before walking a head of him, stepping over the bodies of the Blue Sun mercs that now littered the path. Of course the rest of their way to the clinic, they were under fire, and of course once they actually got there they still had to do something else before the doctor would join them.

“Is there seriously nothing in this galaxy that isn’t as simple as walking up to someone and going “Hey! I need your help with this, wanna come along?”. “Oh but of course! I would love you join you!” And we all just skip our way back to the ship?”

Shepard changed the pitch of her voice with each sentence, throwing her hands up in the air as Jacob snorted and grinned at her bitching.   
“Oh shush, pretty boy.”  
Jacob grinned even more and held up his hands, making a face of “I didn’t do it” as he followed behind his commander. It took them an hour to get to the vents, and another half hour to get the things turned back on while they were being shot at. Shepard checked her omni-tool as they walked back into the Doctors office, glancing up to see the assistant walking around and helping out where he could while the doctor was babbling to fast for her to catch up.

“Working with Cerberus. Should be interesting.”  
Shepard chuckled softly.

“Oh indeed, but listen doc. We need to be some where, so… Do you have all your arrangements done here?”  
He looked around for a moment before nodding.

“Can send emails once aboard ship. Can head out now.”  
Shepard nodded once before turning around, looking towards Jacob.

“I want you to head back. I will take Zaeed and Mordin with me for this one.”  
Jacob was about to protest, but then simply nodded as he headed off ahead of the group. Shepard glancing back to see Mordin checking his omni-tool before focusing on leaving. 

~~~~~

Shepard sat in the back of the cab as mercs of all kinds sat squished together in the small car, she rubbed her forehead with her middle finger as she peeked past her eye lashes and stared at Mordin sitting across from her. Her head tilted slightly as she stared at the older looking salarian, her head leaning against her hand as she leaned against the window.

“Staring is commonly rude, in human society. Can I help you, Shepard?”  
She smiled slightly, shaking her head.

“Not at all, Mordin. You just remind me of someone.”  
The salarian tilted his head as Shepard turned to look out the window just in time to have them land and they all climbed out. Shepard and her team hanging back as they watched everyone else charge off, her arms folding over her chest.

“Should move quickly, Archangel might not have much longer.”  
Shepard smirked as she looked over at Mordin, nodding slightly as she took her time walking through the halls. Turning a corner and coming out one door, she paused in her step as she leaned back, a side door opening, and peered at the mech at the end of the hall. She whistled sharply to catch her team’s attention and they paused in their steps as Shepard ducked into the room quickly and walked to the mech terminal. 

“Uh, you know what you are doin’. Right?”  
Shepard rolled her eyes hearing Zaeed’s uncertainty, smirking as she hacked into the terminal and began to over right the friendlies. 

“I’m sure they wont mind if I up our chances, do you?”  
As she confirmed the changes, they left quickly. Shepard almost stepping into the path of a krogan that was way to big for her comfort as they moved to the main area. She took a peek up at the defence position that Archangel had been set up in, her head dipping out of cover for a second and her shields fired up as a shot ricochet off of her and hit another merc in the leg. She blinked and stared at the merc crying in pain before looking up at the spot again, her eyes narrowing before she quickly moved across the gap and towards the gun ship. 

Shepard snuck around the mercs that stood in front of the ship, making a face as they stared at her as she ducked under and past one of the wings. When she reached around the rear, she tilted her head at the batarian working on the gun ship.

“You Cathka?”  
The batarian slowly stood up and looked at Shepard, lighting a cigarette and blowing the smoke in her face.

“Sargent Cathka.”  
Shepard choked as she breathed in the smoke, waving her hand around to try and help the smoke vanish faster.

“You must be the group Salkie mentioned. You’re just in time.”  
Shepard’s brow lifted as Cathka eyed her up, his eyes lingering on the markings decorating her face.

“Salkie?”  
He shook his head.

“You met him when you were dropped off. He radioed to say you were coming. You three kind of stand out from most of the other freelancers. Anyway…”  
Shepard’s brow lifted again as he spoke, rolling her eyes as she folded her arms over her chest and stared at him.

“The infiltration team is about to give the signal. Archangel wont’ know what hit him.”  
Shepard followed Cathka as he walked over to the terminal that had diagnostics of the gunship, resting her weight on one leg as her hip jutted out.

“Got any questions? This may be your last chance.”  
Shepard shook her head slightly, glancing to the side.

“Are you going to give us cover with that thing?”  
Cathka snorted out a laugh, shaking his head.

“Tarak is the only one who flies her. Besides, she’s not quite ready. That bastard Archangel gave her a beating the last time she was out there. A few more tweaks, she’ll be good as new.”  
Shepard made a soft humming sound as she stared at the gunship, tilting her head to the side as she glanced back at Cathka.

“Are you leading the assault?”  
Shepard scowled as more smoke flew up in her face and she quickly waved her hand around to get rid of it as Cathka laughed.

“Tarak doesn’t pay me to fight. I just plan the attacks and fix the damn gunship. You freelancers get the privilege of—”  
They both looked over at the terminal as the screen changed, the infiltration reporting in no doubt. Shepard peeked closer, nodding to herself. This was about to get fun.

“Check. Bravo team-- Go, go, go!”  
Shepard looked over past the gunship and watched as a group of freelancers pulled out their weapons and checked them over before running towards the barricade they had set up between them and Archangel.

“Archangel’s got quiet a surprise waiting for him. But that means no more waiting for me.”  
Shepard looked back at Cathka as he spoke, her gaze narrowing on him as he walked over to the gunship.

“Gotta get her to a hundered percent before Tarak decides he needs her again.”  
Shepard glanced down at the omni-tool Cathka had been using, her brow lifting slightly as she glanced back over at him. She took a couple steps over to him, placing a hand on her hip as he turned to look at her.

“You’re working too hard…”  
His brow knitted together for a second before he started to scream in pain as Shepard jammed the omni-tool into his lower back and turned it on, electrocuting him. She felt a little bad for doing it, but she needed any advantage she could get in this fight.

“Ready Commander?”  
She smirked at Zaeed as she drew her pistol and climbed up onto the ledge of the barricade.

“When am I not?”  
She laughed as Zaeed scoffed and her team jumped over the barricade. Before her feet could touch the ground, Shepard’s biotics came to life as she threw her hand out and tossed one of the freelances over the edge, his screams drowning out. 

“She’s with Archangel!”  
Shepard grinned as she aimed her pistol and fired off a couple rounds as freelancers closest to her and her team spun around to fire on her. Mordin and Zaeed taking cover on either side of her as she stood in the middle and emptied her thermal clip. Two freelancers now sprawled out dead as she started a strong walk towards the building. She spun in her step as she entered and aimed her pistol across the room, firing her pistol and throwing a lift off to the right as a couple more freelancers got caught up in the biotic field and she grinned as Mordin and Zaeed came in close behind her and finished them off as she scaled the steps to the upper level quickly.

She took the steps two by two, her biotics flaring as she threw a singularity at the two mercs at the door trying to pry it open, their screams dying in their throats as Shepard unloaded her clip into them. On her reload, she looked over at her team and made a face.

“Is it just me, or do their shields suck? Like… a lot?”  
Zaeed scoffed.

“It’s like shooting at swiss cheese.”  
Shepard laughed and shook her head as she walked to the door, quickly entering and closing it behind them as they held their guns up at the ready just in case. Shepard peered over her pistol at the person in question, her brow lifting as she stared at the blue armor he wore. 

“Archangel?”  
She lowered her pistol as she spoke, and he held up his hand, one finger higher then the others before taking aim with again. Shepard waited patiently, glancing back at her team as she rubbed the back of her neck. A shot firing made her look back to see Archangel standing from his kneeling position and walk over to the crates that were off to the side and lazily sat on top of them. He rubbed the visor of his helmet before taking it off and Shepard choked on her breath as she stared at the all to familiar face.

“Shepard... I thought you were dead.”  
Shepard unintentionally dropped her pistol as she stared at Garrus and slowly walked over to him. The large turian stared down at her as she now stood in front of him, her lips quivering ever so slightly as she reached up and touched either side of his face with her hands and he closed his eyes as he hummed at her touch.

“Garrus.”  
He opened his eyes and stared back down at her as she choked out a laugh and smiled up at him. His mandibles flared under her hands as he smiled down at her and reached up, curling the loose strands of her hair in his fingers.

“You shot me, you know.”  
He laughed at her comment, shaking his head.

“Sorry, Shepard, but when you see your old Commander suddenly walking about, well, you begin to question some things.”  
Shepard laughed bleakly and shook her head as he jumped down from his perch on the crates, his arms wrapping around her as he pulled her close to him and nuzzled into her hair. 

“For what it’s worth, I’m glad to see you.”  
Shepard laughed again, this time for real as she looked up at him and wrapped her arms around his shoulders and hugged him tightly. A cough from behind them making them finally release one another and Shepard smiled embarrassed as she took her offered pistol from Mordin.

“Well, how about we get you out of here, big guy?”  
Garrus grinned down at Shepard’s words, nodding.

“Just like old times, Shepard.”  
Shepard laughed as they walked to the ledge to scope things out, grumbling at the shit plan that was laid out in front of them. It didn’t take long for things to go south and Shepard had to leave Garrus after watching the mech destroy it’s own men, but she left Zaeed with him, as she went to the lower levels to deal with the infiltration team. It took longer then she wanted when she finally got back to Garrus in the upper level and dealing with the larger then life krogan didn’t make her fel warm and fuzzy when she entered the room he was held up in to see the krogan trying to pelt Garrus with too many shot gun rounds. 

It took some time, and almost all her ammo, when the krogan finally fell. She quickly checked on Garrus befor and explosion came from the lower level again and Shepard sighed in annoyance as she left with her team and held position at the top of the steps. She growled as she could hear the gunship flying around and left Zaeed and Mordin to handle the steps as she ran to the room to check where it was.   
As Shepard entered the room, she was knocked a step back from the backwind of an explosion in the room, her eyes growing wide as she watched Garrus roll from one side of the room to the other and didn’t move. Her heart dropped to her feet as she looked over at the gunship, her team coming up from behind her.

“Mordin… Please tell me you are as good as I think you are.”  
The salarian stared at Shepard for a moment before nodding.

“Better than.”  
She looked over her shoulder as she grabbed Zaeed by the shoulder and shoved him forwards to take cover behind something.

“Then keep Garrus alive till we can get him to the Normandy.”  
Mordin looked over at Garrus and nodded slightly before looking back at Shepard.

“Will do what I can.”  
Shepard bit her lip as Mordin ran across the room and began to tend to Garrus, growling as she took cover with Zaeed and they both opened fire on the gunship. Zaeed cursed as the gunship dipped down out of sight and the far side of the room filled with mercs, Shepard joining the colourful language as she threw a singularity into the mess to catch a few of them and aimed careful for head shots. Her emerald eyes narrowing as the gunship came back.

“Zaeed. Do me a favor.”  
She looked over at the old man, grinning.

“Film this. Cause this will be good.”  
Zaeed looked confused to a moment until Shepard jumped out of cover as her biotics came to life in a barrier, her arms held up in a protective manner for her head as she sprinted across the room. As she reached the window, Shepard jumped up onto the ledge and used her biotics to give her body an extra push off from it as she jumped, her body glowing brilliantly as she landed heavily on the glass of the gunship. She peered inside for a second before smirking and took her pistol and unloaded it into the glass, the bullets waring down the gunships shields and armor and by time the thermal clip popped, Shepard simply holstered it and slammed a biotically charged fist through the glass. 

Zaeed sat up just enough to be able to hit the record button on his omni-tool, cursing as he watched Shepard punch through the glass of the cockpit and haul the Blue Suns merc from the piolets seat and throw him across the gap, his screamed echoing and dying out as Shepard jumped back into the room, panting, and ran over to Moridn and Garrus. She checked them both over, frowning deeply as it looked like Garrus wasn’t breath and was about to take a step back but jolted up right as Garrus gasped for air.

“Garrus!”  
She was at his side again, taking his hand in hers as she held it tightly and leaned forwards, so he could see her.

“Focus on me! Look at me!”  
He gasped for air, his eyes fluttering open and closed as he stared at Shepard as she yelled at her team to get their asses in gear as she called the Normandy. He watched as she looked back down at him, was she crying? No. His Shepard doesn’t cry. He watched her until he couldn’t anymore, and his mind blacked out.

~~~~~~~

Shepard pulled absent mindedly at her lower lip as she stared at the meeting table in the comm room, her emerald gaze fixated on the wood surface as Jacob spoke to her.

“Commander, we’ve done what we could for Garrus, but he took a bad hit.”  
Shepard scowled as she looked up and stared at Jacob.

“The docs corrected with surgical procedures and some cybernetics. Best we can tell, he’ll have full functionality, but…”  
Shepard didn’t want to listen to Jacob anymore, her eyes shutting as her throat began to feel like it was closing up on itself. 

“Shepard.”  
Her eyes shooting open as she heard the door open.

“Touch son of a bitch… Didn’t think he’d be up yet.”  
Shepard smiled as Garrus walked into the room, cupping her hands over her mouth for a moment before laughing as Garrus spoke.

“No one would give me a mirror. How bad is it?’  
Shepard smiled more at him.

“You were always ugly Garrus. Slap some face paint on there and you can’t tell the difference.”  
Garrus’ mandibles flared as he laughed but stopped as he cupped a hand over his bandage and shook his head.

“Oh ow. Don’t make me laugh. Damn it. My face is barely holding together as is. Some women find facial scars attractive, mind you most of those women are krogan.”  
Shepard chuckled lightly, glancing over at Jacob as he saluted her and left the room before she looked back over at Garrus. He too watched the man leave, his look turning more serious.

“Frankly, I’m more worried about you. Cerberus, Shepard? You remember those sick experiments the were doing.”  
She nodded slightly, shutting her eyes as she rubbed her hands over her arms as she opened her eyes to look back at the table.

“I do. I suppose I could count myself among those now, can’t I?”  
She looked back at Garrus, smiling sadly. He shook his head sternly as he walked over to her, placing his hands on top of hers and held them tightly.

“Don’t you dare.”  
Shepard smiled up at him.

“I’m glad you’re here, Garrus. I need someone I can trust by my side with this.”  
Garrus hummed softly as he nodded, resting the side of his mandible on the side of her head.

“I read the reports before coming… You do realize this means I would be walking into hell with you, right?”  
Shepard laughed as she nodded, peeking up at him.

“Ah hell. Why not. Just like old times, Elizabeth.”  
Shepard felt her eyes grow wide as Garrus said her name and he smiled down at her. She couldn’t help it as her eyes filled with tears and he wrapped his arms around her waist, pulling her to her tippy toes and held her close as she wrapped her arms around his shoulders and held onto him for dear life. He nuzzled his face into her hair, it was in a messy low-down bun and perfect for him to nuzzle against as he took in her scent. She smelt like cinnamon.


	22. Feelings and Confessions

Garrus clicked away at the terminal, he had taken up residence in the forward battery, working on calibrating the weapons system and thinking of ideas that could help in the fight with the collectors. It felt weird to him to be on the Normandy again, even if it was rebuilt, his fingers pausing on the keypad as he looked up and stared across the room. When he saw Shepard from his vantage point on Omega, he felt like he had finally gone mad, or that he accidentally took something that wasn’t medi-gel. He flexed his mandibles gently, testing his mobility without pain shooting through his face, his eyes closing as he ran a hand over the bandage. He was thankful Shepard showed up when she did, if not, he would have definitely been meeting her at the bar some where in the after life.

“Garrus.”  
He blinked and tilted his head, the blue orb in the corner of the room coming to life as her voice echoed in the room.

“The Commander has requested to see you.”  
Garrus’s head tilted to the side.

“Can it wait? I’m in the middle of some calibrations.”  
The blue orbs pulsed a couple times before it spoke again.

“She seems rather adamant on your presence. I would go now.”  
Garrus sighed silently and nodded as he closed what he was working on and made his way to the elevator. His arms folding over his chest as he waited for it, glancing about at the people staring at him as they walked past, and it made him chuckle. Cerberus asking aliens for help, he could almost say he had seen everything now. When the door opened to the elevator, he waited for the people within to leave before stepping inside and smacked the button to the Commanders cabin. 

On the ride up, Garrus thought about the calibrations he had been running, drawing numbers on his hand as he tried working out the solutions. When the elevator stopped, Garrus took a step forward and smacked into the edge as he was too busy thinking about the calibrations he forgot to check where he was going. He groaned and rubbed his nose and shook his head as he walked up to the door to Shepard’s room and brought his hand up to knock but stopped as he tilted his ear towards the door.

He stood there in silence for a moment, staring at the floor as he listened, a quiet muffled choking sound on the other side of the door made him forget about knocking as he opened the door and quickly moved inside. He stood on the first landing, scanning over the fish tank and stared towards the bed, the corner of his eye catching the fiery mess of Shepard’s hair sprawled out on part of the table in the middle of a couch set. He took another step forward and his blood ran cold as he saw her hunched over herself and holding her throat.

He was beside her in an instant, resting his hands on her shoulders and pushing her to lay down. Her eyes were shut tightly as she tried to breath, gasping for a breath as she held her throat in her hands. Garrus’s mandibles flared as he reached up and took her hands and held them tightly, causing her eyes to open and turn towards him. She squirmed on the couch as he held her hands tightly, staring at her as his subvocals hummed out with worry.

“Shepard, it’s alright. Calm down.”  
She rasped out a breath as her head tilted back, her fingers finally closing around his as she held onto him tightly. Garrus leaned over and rested his forehead against hers as she looked back at him, finally gasping for a breath as she stared up at him, his subvocals ringing out with a comforting tone as he stared down at her. Finally, her squirming stilled, and her grip loosened on his hands, her eyes shutting as she gasped properly for air.   
They remained like that for several minutes before Garrus leaned back and helped her sit up, letting go of one of her hands as she rubbed her face and wiped at her eyes.

“What the hell was that?”  
Shepard frowned slightly as she looked up at Garrus’s question, shaking her head as she held onto the hand still in hers.

“I… Don’t know. It’s like, a phantom pain. Like my body hasn’t accepted that it’s alive again yet.”  
She stared up at him sadly, smiling weakly.

“I’m sorry… I wanted you to come to have a quick drink with me. I didn’t think that…”  
She sighed heavily as Garrus looked over his shoulder at the table, seeing it had a bottle of one of the better turian brandy selections, and chuckled as he stood up and moved to the other side of Shepard and sat down. Still holding her hand.

“Don’t apologize.”  
He reached over and poured out a glass as Shepard smiled at him, her fingers tightening around his hand.

“You just wanted to drink? Or did you want to talk about something?”  
Shepard jumped at his question, watching as he took a quick sip from the glass before leaning back into the couch, turning towards her as he got comfortable on the couch.

“Well… no... I mean yes. Uh…”  
Garrus grinned as he watched Shepard trip over her words, shaking his head as he chuckled.

“Are you sure you are Commander Shepard? The women I know wouldn’t be so tongue tied over a simple conversation.”  
Shepard groaned and slapped her face with her free hand as Garrus laughed and leaned forwards to take another sip of his drink.

“It’s not a simple conversation! It’s… Serious… And silly, and…”  
Her voice trailed off as her eyes trailed down and landed on her hand tangled with Garrus’s, her lips thinning.

“Before the Collectors attacked, two years ago, I wanted to ask you something.”  
Garrus’s brow plate lifted as he stared at Shepard, leaning back with drink in hand.

“Before Nihlus died… He taught me a lot, about turians and their subvocals and… Things.”  
Shepard stared to the side, unable to look at Garrus as his mandibles flickered, trying to understand what she was getting at.

“When we went to earth for Shore leave, you kissed me. When you know you didn’t have too because of the silly human tradition. But you did. And after that… Your subvocals were everywhere.”  
Garrus watched Shepard as she started to play with the loose ends of her hair that hung over her shoulder, his eyes traveling over the length of the fiery strands as Shepard spoke again.

“Your subvocals started to sing the same as Nihlus’s. That… you, uhm… Liked me.”  
Garrus was in mid sip of his drink when she spoke the last words, and spewed it all over the table in shock as his mandibles flared as he looked back to Shepard in a panic as he removed his hand from hers to wipe the liquor from his mouth.

“You were taught how to read that?!”  
Shepard opened her mouth to speak but then simply nodded, her head tilting slightly before she stood and went to the bathroom, returning with a towel and handed it to Garrus as he began to clean up his mess.

“Why does that surprise you? I had to go answer a lot of questions that day I received the markings for myself.”  
Garrus glanced up at Shepard as she spoke about the markings, his eyes dancing over the white paint still vibrantly painted across her features, his subvocals humming loudly as loved the way they made her look.

“You’re doing it again.”  
Garrus coughed at her words and shut his eyes as he dropped the towel, rubbing his hands over his face before staring up at Shepard as she remained standing.

“It’s been two years, Garrus. Yet you are still singing that you like me…”  
Garrus sighed as he stood up and took a step over to her, his hands lifting to rest on her shoulders.

“A lot has happened in those two years. Everyone we knew left, broken by your death. Hell, I think Alenko took it harder then I did dispite your clear uninterest in him.”  
Shepard chuckled at that, shaking her head as she rubbed the back of her neck.

“Kaidan was always one to jump in head first without thinking.”  
Shepard smiled up at Garrus before looking back at the floor, frowning.

“When I saw it was you, on Omega, I wanted to run to you and kiss you, hold you, just to be sure you were real. And even if you weren’t, I still wanted to do it, so that I could have that small bit of you that I missed out on.”  
Shepard titled her head up, smiling up at the confused expression on Garrus’s face.

“Before I died. I wanted to ask you if you wanted to try being with me, not just as a one-night fling.”  
Garrus’s mandibles flared painfully in shock at her words and he winced, his hand shooting up to the bandage as he hissed.

“Are you alright!? Hang on, there is some ice here…”  
Shepard turned to get another towel but Garrus grabbed her shoulder firmly and spun her back around, her emerald eyes staring up at him in confusion just before he dipped down and pressed his lips against hers. Shepard stood there in frozen shock for a moment, her mind trying to catch up to the situation. Finally, her arms lifted and wrapped around Garrus’s shoulders and held him tightly as his other arm snaked around her lower back and held her just as tight, his subvocals purring loudly. 

When Garrus pulled back from the kiss, he grinned down at Shepard as she stood with her eyes closed and nibbled on her lower lip, making a quiet moaning sound, before looking back up at him as her hands trailed down his arms.

“Elizabeth. You know as well as I do, that our feelings are more then just that…”  
She stared up at Garrus as he spoke, holding tightly to his arms as he wrapped them both around her lower back and held her.

“You and I are drawn to each other. Instinctually searching for each other.”  
His voice growled lowly in her ear as she leaned into him, closing her eyes as he nuzzled the side of his mandible against her head.

“Commander.”  
Shepard groaned as EDI’s voice echoed through her cabin.

“We are nearing our destination of the krogan war lord.”  
Shepard sighed as Garrus chuckled and pulled away slightly, the both of them staring at one another.

“Thank you, EDI. Please inform Mordin I would like him to accompany me.”  
The orb flickered and vanished as Shepard sighed again and chuckled as Garrus gently placed his hand on her cheek.

“I guess we will have to continue this conversation later?”  
Shepard nodded and smirked up at him as she took a step back and moved over to her desk and fished around in the drawers for a tie. Lifting a brow as Garrus stared at her, watching as she pulled the waist length of her hair up and spun it around itself, tying it in place before walking back over to him and gently poked his forehead.

“You know, it’s nit nice to stare.”  
Garrus grinned and chuckled as he watched Shepard walk past him and head for the door.

“On the contrary. I believe staring is completely appropriate if you are staring at someone you think is gorgeous beyond life.”  
Shepard sputtered and looked over at him, her cheeks a bright red blush at his words.

“Mr.Vakarian! Will you stop trying to flatter your CO and get your ass moving to the shuttle bay for the next mission please?”  
Garrus laughed loud and hard as he followed behind Shepard. He grinned in the elevator trip down while she tried to calm down the blush on her cheeks, and when the elevator stopped, Garrus leaned down quickly and surprised her with a quick kiss on the lips before leaving the elevator. He was grinning as Shepard cursed colourfully, trying to put her armor on.


	23. A Krogan and an Awkward moment

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This chapter is short. I know. I'm sorry!! I will make the next one longer though, promise.

Shepard stared at the krogan inside the tank, pulling at her lower lip as she mumbled quietly to herself. 

“She always does that?”  
Mordin tilted his head towards Shepard as Garrus came up beside him, the turian shrugging his shoulders.

“Only when she’s annoyed.”  
Shepard sighed loudly and groaned as she licked the metal casing of the tank and looked at the dead body of their would be krogan companion, kicking it too. 

“Stupid, fucking, krogan, ass bite, stupid…”  
Shepard kicked the body with each word until she finally took a deep breath and brought her hand up to her ear piece.

“Jooooker. This stupid fucking krogan warlord is an ass munch and got himself killed. Buuuut, we have a different pick up... And it’s a big one.”  
Shepard looked over at Garrus as she heard him laughing quietly at her out burst and smirked, shaking her head as Mordin looked at them both with a mildly amused look on his face.

~~~~~

Garrus found himself staring at Shepard’s waist as they unloaded back on the Normandy, a quiet hum of approval of they way they moved back her pause in her step and look over at him. To which he casually pulled up his sniper and pretended to check it over for any damages. She rolled her eyes and grinned as she directed for the krogan tank to be taken down to the engineering deck. Shepard was about to jump into the elevator when it came back but stopped as Miranda and Jacob were on board and spun on her heels and started walking in the other direction, the two following her.

“Shepard, we need to talk about the dangers of the krogan you just brought.”  
Shepard rolled her eyes.

“No, we dooooon’t.”  
Garrus and Mordin, who had been checking their weapons before putting them back in the locker, looked up at the commotion.

“Commander, I think it was an brilliant idea. Even though the warlord was a no go, we still got a krogan on our side.”  
Shepard groaned loudly as she rounded a pile of crates, trying to shake them as Miranda started talking again.

“How do you know he’s on our side? It could be just one horrible idea. A raging krogan down in engineering is not ideal.”  
Shepard groaned even louder as she cupped her hands over her ears, trying to block them out. Garrus grinned as he watched her as Mordin tilted his head as Shepard finally spun around and ended their bickering as she put a stasis field around them both.

“Shut up!”  
Frozen in place, Miranda and Jacob could only watch their commander from the corner of their eyes.

“I am Commander of the Normandy, right? Right! Do I have the dossers on everyone? Yes, yes I do. Do I have a history of doing impossible things with people who I think are dumber then rocks? Why yes, yes I do.”  
She looked between then, realizing something.

“Oh, those people would be you both, and almost every other human out there. Just in case you were wondering.”  
Garrus couldn’t help it as he snickered, covering his mouth as Shepard glanced over in his direction.

“Now… Will you PLEASE stop trying to kiss my ass and second guessing me? Please? Yes? Thank you!”   
She spun on her heels and speed towards the elevator, the doors closing just as Miranda and Jacob came out of the stasis fields, gasping for air as they both looked towards the elevator before looking at each other and began bickering and blaming one another for “scaring” the commander.  
Garrus shook his head and looked over towards the elevator, his brow lifting slightly as he watched the lights on the side say it was down in engineering. 

“You and Shepard. Have an interesting relationship.”  
Garrus jumped and looked over at Mordin as he spoke, his brow plates lifting.

“What now?”  
Mordin shook his head.

“You like her. She likes you. Yet you both don’t “make the move”.”  
Mordin looked over at Garrus and he coughed.

“There is… a lot behind that.”  
Mordin tilted his head.

“Why? Because Shepard was claimed dead? She is not. She is here. What is problem?”  
Garrus rubbed the back of his neck nervously, looking at Mordin.

“Do you really want to be talking to me about this?”  
Mordin tilted his head again and looked up, pondering, before looking back at Garrus and shook his head.

“Maybe later. Maybe after finished with Collector specimens.”  
Garrus let out a heavy sigh as Mordin walked away, shaking his head as he put his sniper away and stared at Shepard’s locker. Why hasn’t he made a move?

~~~~~~~~~~

Shepard stared Grunt down as he had her pinned against the wall, her brow lifting slightly as he finally made the decision to let her go.

“Good choice.”  
Grunt make a noise and looked down as the clicking of metal against his armor caught his attention, a loud bellowing laugh left him as Shepard pulled back her pistol as he set her on the floor.

“Wise Shepard. Offer one hand but arm the other.”  
She smirked slightly, making sure he was settled in his space before leaving him. Rubbing the back of her neck as she closed her eyes and sighed tiredly. She waited for the elevator and took it up to her cabin, sheading her armor and stood in her under clothing in front of her terminal, checking her mail. She smiled as she got a responding message from Anderson with a photo attachment, her brow lifted as she tapped on it and almost started crying as she looked at the picture of Caneo sitting next to Anderson at his desk.

She laughed and smiled as she let him know she will stop by the citadel soon, then shut off her terminal as she walked into the bathroom and turned her shower on. The steam filled the bathroom from the hot water, and the main room as she forgot to close the door, and soon her whole cabin became like a sauna. When she turned the water off, she grabbed a towel for her hair and stepped out of the bathroom, her eyes growing wide as she realized she wasn’t alone and her emerald gaze was locked on Garrus as he stood shocked and slack jawed.


	24. Frustration

“I—”  
Shepard was frozen in place, dripping wet still from her shower with a towel half on her hair as she stared at Garrus.

“I—Am SO sorry!”  
She quickly took the towel and wrapped it around her body as Garrus turned to leave, grabbing his arm to keep him where he was.

“What are you doing here?”  
Garrus looked everywhere but at her, his mandibles flaring and flicking nervously as he rubbed the back of his neck.

“I... Well… I wanted to… Uhm…”  
Shepard smiled lightly as she let go of his arm, gently grabbing his hand and pulling him inside.

“Come in. Take your time. I’ll get dressed.”  
Garrus looked down at Shepard as she spoke, his mandibles hugging tight to his face before flaring wide.

“No!”  
Shepard stopped and looked up at him, her brow arched.

“I mean… You don’t… Need to…”  
Shepard tilted her head, placing her hands on her hip.

“Alright, Vakarian. What’s on your mind?”  
Garrus fidgeted, scratching his jaw gently as he looked around the room. Was it getting hot?

“I mean that… You… We… erm… That is…”  
Shepard stared at Garrus for a moment before realization hit her and she grinned broadly and clicked her tongue against her teeth.

“Ahh. I see what you are getting at. You are thinking about what I said before we went to get the krogan.”  
Garrus rubbed the back of his neck again, nodding slightly, his eyes still staring off to the side.

“Yeaaah. Honestly, I haven’t thought of much else…”  
Shepard grinned even more as she watched him, now folding her arms over her chest.

“Really? So, all that purring you did wasn’t for me?”  
Garrus groaned and placed his face in his hands, and Shepard laughed.

“Spirits.”  
She laughed more and took a step towards him and placed her hands on top of his, smiling gently as she pulled his hands away from his face and gently kissed his mandible.

“You’re cute when you are embarrassed.”  
Garrus stared down at Shepard, his mandibles twitching nervously. She smiled up at him, pulling his hands down to her waist and left them there as she placed her own on his elbows, still smiling at him as his hands rested nervously on her hips.

“I don’t want to make you uncomfortable, Garrus.”  
He laughed softly, shaking his head.

“You could never make me uncomfortable. Nervous, maybe, but never uncomfortable.”  
She smiled up at him as he confidently lifted his hand and brushed it through her hair, her eyes closing as she leaned into the touch. He ran his hand along the wet strands of her hair, watching as it fell through his fingers when he reached the end and smiled at Shepard as she peered up at him, her brow lifted as he reached up once again and gently brushed his fingers through it again.

“You know, it looks better when it’s dry.”  
Garrus laughed softly, nodding as he dropped his hand and she stepped back from him, smiling.

“I- I know, it’s just… it was fun to play with.”  
Shepard laughed softly, shaking her head as she walked across the room and grabbed her brush, looking back at Garrus as she pulled the length over her shoulder and began to brush it out.

“So, tell me. Did you come up here just to confess your thoughts? Or was there something else?”  
Garrus watched as she brushed out her hair, his mandibles flicking as he watched her. He made a bold move, crossing the room over to her and took the brush from her hands and dipped down, pressing his lips firmly against hers. Shepard gasped quietly at the bold move, staring wide eyed at him, and Garrus grabbed her hands with his and wrapped them around his neck. He smiled down at her as she stared up in surprise, chuckling softly.

“I- uh- I was wondering, many things, one of them why I hadn’t… Made a move.”  
Shepard grinned up at Garrus as he spoke, her fingers gently curling around is neck and sneaking their way up.

“I thought about it... Longer then I should have, and I--- Ah!”  
Garrus cried out in surprise as Shepard had placed her fingers gently under his cowl and traced gentle circles across the soft sensitive underside, and Garrus’s eyes closed blissfully before looking at her.

“I was talking, you know.”  
Shepard giggled softly, shyly, staring up at Garrus with a sly smile.

“You talk too much, Vakarian.”  
Shepard smiled as Garrus shook his head at her before dipping his head and pressing his hard lips against hers. He never understood kissing between humans, it was a strange thing he thought he would never understand, but now he was kissing her. His hands slid down her sides and held her hips firmly as she pressed up against him, gasping softly as her emerald gaze lifted to stare up at him while his fingers played with the fold of the towel rapped around her. She smirked up at him as he took either side of the fold and started to peel it open but they both stopped, frozen in place, as EDI’s voice rung out through Shepard’s cabin.

“Shepard. We are beginning our approach on Purgatory.”  
Shepard and Garrus stared at each other, Garrus’s mandibles flaring in both annoyance and a playful grin as Shepard’s pleased face turned into one of displeasure and rage.

“Thank you. EDI.”  
Her words came out in a very spiteful tone as she spoke to the AI, groaning softly as she reached up and cupped Garrus’s face in her hands and pressed her forehead against his as he nuzzled affectionately against her cheek.

“One day… I am going to put a do not disturb sign somewhere.”  
Garrus laughed softly, helping her tuck her towel back into place.

“Soon, hopefully.”  
Garrus traced his talons across Shepard’s cheek and smiled as she leaned into his touch, making a quiet noise as he turned on his feet and left her cabin. Shepard groaned, rubbing her face with her hands angerly before she went about getting ready, tying her hair up and getting dressed as she left her cabin and to the elevator. Her tongue clicked as she looked over at Garrus and Grunt as she requested them to join her, smirking playfully at Garrus as he purred in her direction and laughed as Grunt stared at them confused before throwing his hands in the air, claiming he will never understand. 

As they boarded Purgatory, Shepard bumped into Garrus on purpose, rubbing her armor against his as she stared up at him with partially lidded eyes and grinned at him as he groaned. They would definitely need to do something soon, less they go mad from the frustration.


	25. Crashed Memories

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'M ALIVE!!! I SWEAR!! ........  
> I recently got a new job! YAY! Kind of.... Means less posting, le sigh. BUT! I have, kind of, gotten back into a groove! So hopefully more posting!! :D

When Shepard brought Jack on board, her head nearly split in two as she listened to Miranda complain about the woman. She sat on the table in the meeting room, head in her hands, and groaned as Miranda bitched and complained for a solid hour after Jack had left to settle in the lower decks.

“This is irresponsible, Commander! Lord knows what she will find or do.”  
Shepard sighed, heavily, and over dramatic to put emphasis on her annoyance with the woman.

“Will you stop acting like you’re in high school, Miranda?”  
Miranda halted in her pacing step and stared at Shepard as she finally spoke, her eyes wide.

“Excuse me?”  
Shepard scoffed softly and smiled at Miranda’s expression.

“Look. I made the deal. I am responsible for Jack, and anything she decides to do in the future. So, will you stop acting like I just stole your head cheerleading spot?”  
Shepard smiled sweetly at Miranda as the raven-haired woman just gaped at her, for once at a loss for words.

“Now… If you are done reprimanding me, I have prior engagements.”  
Shepard then hopped off the table and walked away from Miranda, leaving the woman alone, and a small smile spread across her face as she rounded the corner and stopped to see Mordin, giggling quietly as the salarian was so engrossed in his work he never even saw her despite the fact he was responding to her words. Shaking her head slightly, Shepard finally left and walked toward the map, watching as the lights flickered and danced.

“Commander? You have a new message at your private terminal.”  
Shepard paused in her step as Kelly called out to her, smiling lopsided at the young girl before stepping up to the console. Her head tilted slightly, and she had to push loose strands of her hair back from her eyes, as she stared down at the screen and opened her inbox. She waited patiently, looking around the room and staring at each of the human face, she grimaced slightly at them still not feeling completely okay with what she was doing. 

A small chime made her eyes flick back to the console and she smiled when she saw a message from Anderson, her mind drifting off as she began thinking she needed to head back to the Citadel soon. Her eyes drifted further down the list of messages and paused when she saw one from Admiral Hackett, her brow shooting so far up it almost vanished into her hair line.  
She hesitantly opened the message, skimming over the text and closed it as quickly as she opened it. Her mouth felt dry, horse, and she waited a moment before speaking out to the pilot.

“Joker? I’m sending you new coordinates.”  
There was a pause in the haul of the ship as she flicked a button on her console to send to the cockpit, the silence eating at the back of her mind.

“Wait, isn’t that…?”  
Jokers voice rang out in the haul and Shepard closed her eyes, leaning heavy on the railing next to her console.

“Please just do it.”  
“Aye aye, Ma’am.”  
Shepard spun on her heels and walked to the elevator, tugging at her fingers as she waited for the door to close behind her before speaking to the AI.

“EDI… Please let me know when we get there… I will be in the forward battery room.”

“Of course, commander.”  
Shepard closed her eyes and took in a deep breath, waiting for the elevator to finish making its slow crawl down to the second deck. Once the door swung open, Shepard was sure she left a breeze behind her with the pace she took on as she walked to the battery room. She tried to slow in her step, tried to calm down, but almost ran into the doors while waiting for them to open.

“Ah, Shepard.”  
His voice made her stop in her step and she simply stared at Garrus for a long time, opening her mouth to speak but nothing came out.

“Shepard?”  
She cleared her throat and swallowed hard, closing her eyes as she folded her hands in front of her. Garrus watched her carefully, unsure if he’s ever seen her so rattled.

“I got a message from Hackett… They… Ah… They found the Normandy’s crash site.”  
Garrus watches Shepard for a long moment before turning back to his console and pressing a button to close the door. Once it was sealed shut, he closed the distance between them and placed his hands on her shoulders.

“Are you alright?”  
She nodded once, slow.

“Hackett has… Requested that we set a memorial statue at the crash site… He sent it in the last group of supplies that arrived while we were on board Purgatory.”  
Garrus nodded slightly, dipping his head and gently nuzzled his mandible against her forehead. 

“Do you want me to go with you?”  
All she could do was nod and Garrus pulled her into his arms, carefully holding her against his armor as he nuzzled against the top of her head. Shepards hold was hesitant at first, shaky, and her breathing hitched as she held to Garrus like a life line. Her face burrowing against his armor as she tried to breath deep. Garrus purred in his sub-vocals, attempting to calm Shepards distress, as he continued to hold her close.

What felt like an eternity of holding onto one another, was only a few minutes before EDI’s voice echoed into the room.

“Commander. We have arrived.”  
Shepard tilted her head up and stared over at the blue orb as it flashed in the room, letting out a heavy breath as she closed her eyes and nodded slightly. Garrus’ hands coming up from her shoulder and waist to gently cup her cheeks, his thumb tracing across the white paint on her jaw line.

“I’m with you.”  
Shepard smiled up at him sadly, cupping her hands over his and remained still for a while longer before finally moving, but never letting go of his hand as they made their way to the shuttle bay.

~~~~~~~ Planet Side ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Garrus watched Shepard carefully as she stepped out of the shuttle, offering his hand to her when she paused and seemed hesitant. She took it and Garrus could feel her hands shaking in her gloves, so he simply held her hand tighter as they began looking around at the wreck. 

“I… Was spaced from here.”  
Garrus looked at Shepard when she spoke, pausing in their steps when they reached the cockpit of the old Normandy. 

“I helped Joker get in the pod… And…”  
Her voice trailed off and Garrus gently squeezed her hand before they continued to walk. Shepard had found a couple old tags from the dead crew, now keeping her eyes out for more as the continued walking. It was a long painful hour for both of them, Shepard as she collected the tags of her old crew and almost reliving the experience, while Garrus could only watch her suffer and not know how to help her. 

Shepard had finally decided to place the monument next to the outer haul of the ship that was wedged between two large mounts of snow covered rock, the gold statue glinting in the sun light and reflected beautifully against the Normandy’s name painted to the outer haul. Garrus stood there for a while, not noticing when Shepard walked away from his side, but when he finally found her, she was sitting on her knees and hugging something in her lap.

“Shepard?”  
He walked over to her slowly and knelt down to see what she was clutching too, and his breathing hitched. Her old helmet. Garrus made a soft clicking noise and placed his arm across her back and she responded by leaning into it, allowing Garrus room to wedge his arm under her knees and hoist her body up into his arms and carry her back to the shuttle.  
The ride back to the ship was silent, Shepard still clutching her helmet as Garrus sat with her in his lap. Once they docked, he picked her up in the same fashion and walked briskly to the elevator. He paused seeing Grunt was inside, finally leaving his room to explore the ship and made a noise at the krogan before stepping into the small space.

“What happened?”  
Garrus looked at Grunt as he motioned to Shepard in his arms and he sighed heavily.

“I’ll tell you another time, Grunt. For now, just make sure no one else comes in here.”  
Grunt made a noise of acknowledgement, and as if on que, the doors slid open and Miranda looked up at the three of them with annoyance.

“Commander, we need to talk!”  
Garrus groaned and Grunt stepped off the elevator and into Miranda’s space.

“Not now you don’t.”  
Garrus tried so hard to not laugh, watching Miranda flinch away from the krogan, her gaze flicking back to the elevator just in time to have it shut firmly and resume its course to Shepards cabin.

Once the doors opened again, Garrus moved into Sheaprds room quickly and set her down on the couch, finally able to remove his helmet.

“EDI. Lock the doors. No one comes in here. If they need something… Tell them to piss off.”

“Affirmative, Arch-Angel.”  
Garrus removed his gloves and chest piece quickly before turning back to Shepard and began helping her remove her armor. His mandibles pressing tight to his jaw when he removed her helmet only to see her cheeks stained with tears. Garrus’ heart ached as he watched her, carefully removing her gloves, her shoulder pads, her chest piece. When he moved to her pants, Shepard blinked partially and finally looked at Garrus.

“Garrus…?”  
He made a low humming noise to acknowledge her, removing her boots.

“I’m…. still here, right?”  
Garrus looked up at her, his head tilting slightly as he put her boots to the side.

“This… Isn’t a really fucked up dream that will vanish. Right?”  
Garrus felt his mandibles flare in shock at her words, shaking his head as he took the old helmet from her hands and sat on the couch next to her. The armor plating of their legs knocking together as he pulled her into his lap and wrapped his arms around her and held her tightly.

“No, Liz… It is not a dream. You are here.”  
Shepard closed her eyes tightly and wrapped her arms around his waist, holding to him for dear life as a silent sob ripped from her lungs and more tears ran down her cheeks. Garrus closed his eyes, a quiet chirping leaving his throat as he purred and tried to sooth her, his hand running up and down her back across her shirt, carefully running his talons across her scalp and massaging her hair between the pads of his fingers. He continued to hold her, run his hand over her back and head, till her grip loosened around him and he tilted his head down to look at her. 

A small sigh left him through his nose as he took note that she finally fell asleep and he tested his movements, lifting her in his arms again and moving over to the bed. He dropped her down gently into the sheets before removing her leggings, then his, and climbed onto the other side of the bed and pulled her back into his arms. She made a quiet whimpering noise and she pressed against his bare chest plate and he simply watched as she slept, managing to untangle her hair from the messy bun she wore and began to slowly run his talons threw the fiery strands.


	26. Good Boy

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I feel I rushed this chapter.... But... I hope it's enjoyed none the less! :D

Garrus watched, partially amused, as Shepard sat at the table in the mess hall with her hands over her ears and clearly not listening to Miranda or Jacob as the two humans bickered and complained about things to her. After calming down, mostly, from visiting the crash site, Shepard had busied herself with talking to the crew and asking if they needed anything from the citadel before plotting a course. Now it was the waiting that was killing her. That and the two humans who won't leave her alone. 

"And I'm telling you it's irresponsible." 

Shepard dropped one of her hands on the table, staring up at Miranda. 

"No, what's irresponsible is trying to go behind our Commanders back and attempting to block Jack's access to our files." 

Shepard groaned softly and rubbed the side of her head. 

"She shouldn't' have been given access in the first place!" 

Shepard closed her eyes, letting the two argue more. 

"It wasn't your call, Miranda. It's the commanders. You are not in charge here." 

Miranda scoffed, loudly, folding her arms over her chest. 

"Perhaps not, but if I was-" 

Shepard cut her off by laughing, short and quiet before looking at the woman. 

"If you want to take over, then by all means. Please. I'd love to see how you do." 

Jacob covered his mouth to keep from laughing while Garrus full on chuckled, and rather loudly, catching the human's attention. He stopped chuckling the moment their eyes landed on him, Jacob still grinning while Miranda looked about ready to jump him and Shepard simply rose from her seat and walked over to him and gently threaded her fingers into his and gave his hand a gentle squeeze. 

"Sorry, Commander. I could not help but over hearing." 

Shepard laughed softly, shaking her head. 

"No worries, Garrus. I know that your hearing is better than ours, you can't help it." 

Shepards eyes cut over to Miranda as she scoffed and muttered "He could try" under her breath and Shepard's brow lifted as she stared over at the other human. 

"Something to say?" 

Miranda glared at Shepard, but soon lost all of the heat behind it when Shepards body pulsed in biotic energy and causing Miranda to take a step back and hold up her hands in form of surrender. It was now Jacobs turn to choke out a laugh, winning the glare from Miranda. Shepard grinned and gently leaned over onto Garrus' shoulder, closing her eyes as he moved his head and gently nuzzled the bottom of his jaw on top her head, the purr rumbling in his chest causing Shepard to grin even more. 

"Commander." 

Shepard groaned lightly and opened her eyes at the AI's voice. 

"Yes, EDI?" 

Shepard wiggled her head gently under Garrus' jaw, making his purr stop with a sputter at the sudden movement and caused her to giggle quietly as he looked down at her with a flutter of his mandibles. 

"We have begun docking procedures at the Citadel." 

Shepard tilted her head up and looked at Garrus, smiling nervously. 

"Want to come with me?" 

Garrus tilted his head, pondering. 

"That depends... What's the plan?" 

Shepard made a noise, tilting her head far enough to the side to expose her neck which Garrus took full advantage of and dipped his head, gently nuzzling his head against her skin. 

"I need to see the Council, maybe I'll be lucky and they will restore my Spectre status, I have some Thief to meet from the dossier's, and I have a four legged companion to pick up." 

Garrus chuckled quietly at the last part, his mandibles flaring in a small grin as he nuzzled her neck more firmly before pulling back and standing straight. 

"Well, I suppose we could do worse for a first date." 

Shepard's face turned bright red at his words and she spun around quickly to slap his shoulder, Garrus pretended to cower away from her, laughing as he held up his hands in a defensive manner as if it would protect him from her slapping his shoulder and gently shoving him. After the fifth slap, he laughed more and quickly snatched up her wrists and held them close to his chest with one hand while his other arm snacked around her waist. 

"Such abuse." 

Shepard giggled quietly, smirking up at him. 

"Only because you deserved it." 

Garrus made a low humming noise, thinking, before dipping his head and gently nuzzled his mandible against the side of her head before releasing her and took a step back. 

"Shall we?" 

Shepard rolled her eyes at him but nodded, smiling as they made their way to the air lock. 

~~~~~~~~~~Citadel~~~~~~~~~ 

Shepard blinked when she felt Garrus' hand wrap around her own, her gaze dropping form the door they stood in front of and to their fingers as her turian companion slowly worked to winder her fingers around his. 

"You ok?" 

She nodded once, her brow furrowing slightly as she looked back at the door that would open to Anserson's office. After talking to Kasumi through an advertising stand, she didn't think her day could get stranger and yet here she was, frozen, as she stood in front of the office door. 

"Do you need another minute?" 

She nodded again and Garrus gently pulled her away from the door and lead her to the far railing, giving her a moment to collect herself. She took in a heavy breath and closed her eyes, rubbing her face with her free hand. 

"I didn't think seeing him again would be so hard..." 

Garrus chuckled quietly, gently tugging her hand and pulling her close to him. 

"It's been two years. Maybe not for you, but for us, It's a miracle to be near you again." 

Shepard puffed out a breath and playfully glared up at Garrus. 

"I know that. It's just..." 

She looked back at the door, biting her lower lip. 

"The man practically raised me, Garrus." 

She looked up at Garrus, her brow furrowed so close together it looked like one long fuzzy caterpillar. Garrus sighed softly before chuckling, gently flicking stray strands of hair from her face. 

"All the more reason to stop stalling." 

Shepard let out an undignified squawking noise at that. 

"I am NOT stalling!" 

Garrus lifted a brow plate as he stared at her, her voice raise just barely at yelling pitch, and he let out an unbelieving "mhmm" noise. A loud hissing noise made them turn their attention towards the now open door and Shepard had barely enough time to register what was happening before she was suddenly on her back with what felt like a five ton body lying on top of her. She opened her mouth to sqy something, but all that came out was a very loud "ewwwww!" As a long slobbery tongue came out and started to lap at her face, and everywhere else it could reach for that matter. Garrus just stood there, blinking, as he watched the silver Varrin pounce Shepard and knock her over and now assault her with licks, unable to help the laughter bubbling up from his chest as he cupped a hand over his mouth to try and stop it. 

A sharp whistle sounded and the licking stopped. Shepard laughed breathlessly and stared up at the large Varrin still on top of her, smiling fondly as she gently reached up and scrubbed behind his ears. 

"Who's a good boy? You are, yes you." 

She giggled loudly as Caneo thumped his head heavily on her chest and just laid there, his tail wagging happily as a low purring noise sounded in his throat. Garrus grinned as he watched, leaning on the railing as his gaze drifted over to the human standing in the doorway. 

"I was beginning to wonder if you would ever come in, seems hearing your voice he got impatient. He missed you, Shepard." 

She looked up from the drooling face on her chest and smiled widely. She gently pushed Caneo on the side of his neck and he slid right off of her and landed with a heavy thud before jumping upright and gently nudged Shepards side as she stood up as if he was giving her a hand. Garrus simply watched as Caneo then walked over to him and sat on his rump, the two of them watching as Shepard was wrapped up in a hug as Anderson approached her when she was on her feet again. Shepard hugged him back just as tightly, pressing her face into his shoulder as his hand gently traveled across her spine, Garrus could have sworn he heard Shepard crying. 

"Come. There is much to talk about." 

Anderson smiled at Shepard as he took a step back from her after what felt like forever, motioning for her and Garrus to come into his office. Shepard smiled up Garrus as he came over and gently placed his hand on her shoulder, watching as she patted her leg and Caneo came charging after them before the door to the office could close and lock him outside. 

~~~~~~~~~~~~~Normandy~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ 

When Shepard and Garrus got back to the Normandy, Caneo tore off to explore the new ship. A small grin on her face as she watched the varrin disrupt the work of almost every single human in the bridge. 

"Varrin on board the ship? What happened for this?" 

Shepard grinned even more as she watched Mordin trying not to get run over by the large beast, shaking her head with a small giggle. 

"His name is Caneo, Mordin. Be nice to him, he's mine." 

Mordin blinked slowly, looking from Shepard over to the varrin as one of the crew shrieked so loudly it caught eveyones attention, half of them bursting out in laughter as they saw the human female had jumped up onto her console and tried shooing Caneo away with her foot. 

"Caneo? Yours? Interesting." 

Shepard grinned and walked past Mordin, gently patting the Salarian's shoulder as she walked over to Caneo and gently patted his neck, the large beast stopping his playful antics instantly and sat straight as an arrow as Shepard knelt in front of him. 

"Listen here, bud. You need to behave yourself, ok? No scaring the crew." 

Caneo tilted his head once, then to the other side, before growling quietly and dipped his head. Shepard smiled brightly and gently ran her fingers across the top of his head, watching as Garrus walked passed them with a few bags in hand. He stopped a few feet away and dug inside one of the bags and pulled out a bright orange ball, giving a sharp whistle before barely throwing it at Caneo who snapped his head in the direction of the whistle before snapping his jaws around the ball and began chewing on the rubbery orb as Shepard stood and walked over to Garrus and smirked. 

"How much do you think Miranda is going to want to kill me?" 

Garrus tilted his head slightly, pondering the question before he looked back at Shepard with a turian grin. 

"On a scale of 1-10? About 1000." 

Shepard burst out in laughter as she watched Caneo stand from chewing his ball, still having it in his mouth, and trotted over to her and Garrus as they pressed the command for the elevator. When it arrived, Shepard simply smirked as she watched the metal doors slide open to reveil Miranda standing there, data pad in hand. 

"Oh, Commander-" 

She took a step forward but stopped immediately as Caneo began growling at her, the surprised squeak coming from Miranda almost making Shepard topple over laughing. 

"What the hell Shepard?!" 

Shepard couldn't stop it. She was laughing so hard she had to use Garrus as support and he helped her climb into the elevator, pushing Miranda out so Caneo could get in, and Shepard simply grinned at Miranda as she glared daggers into her. 

"Good boy." 

And with that, the doors closed and the elevator was sent to Shepards Cabin.


End file.
